When Everyone Is Special - Nobody Is

Let me start by saying that this is purely a crazy thought that just popped in my head while watching a scene in the TV series "Witcher". My sister-in-law, God love her, is hooked on anything that has to do with a magical realm. During the episode, they spoke of witches against humans. I had never given any real thought to it before, but I always thought of witches as being humans that had either tripped up on some special knowledge, or one that was born into the art. All of it make believe and no chance of being real. I still do.

So why am I writing this thread? Because last night I saw a commercial that made me ask myself the same question. What is our obsession with being "special? Why is it considered an anathema just to be exactly the way we are? This constant push to be something or someone else, can't be healthy for the psyche or for society as a whole. The number of children stories, movies, programs, all focus on an ordinary child having secret or hidden magical or super human powers, are everywhere. Why do so many people push for their child to be labeled as "gifted"?

I believe it started out with the right idea, but it got lost somewhere along the way. Instead of leading children to understand that they should embrace who they are, they are making children unsatisfied with who they are, and have them chasing some magical power or gift that remains elusive, because it does not exist the way their mind wants it to be.

I have nothing against fairy tales, stories about magic and special powers. I just think, like everything else in this world, it needs to be balanced. Before the "Internet of Everything", we had to use our imagination to bring to life what we read. So in a way everything was pretty much individually and custom made for our own needs and understanding. With CGI so real that even the experts have trouble telling what is CGI or not, the impressionable minds of our children, can become overwhelmed, confused, and unfortunately fractured.

Children have enough on their plate and this virtual world that they have embraced, is not a magical realm where they can live happily ever after, and their quest for their hidden self, may not yield powers that are not available to everyone else on this planet. I think we may be setting them up if we don't encourage balance into their world, even if it means ripping away the curtain that shields them from reality.


Disclaimer:
I have not watched "Witcher" so I don't know anything about it outside what I saw in a brief couple of scenes. I don't think I will be watching it, only because I am not crazy about movies about witches and the likes.

a reply to: NightSkyeB4Dawn

Oh my OP.. S&F for an awesome thread !

I’ve been concerned for over a decade now how the cults of magic and witchcraft have been introduced to the screen and used to indoctrinate children.

Mind you .. show biz has always been that way..old Walt Disney stuff has a lot of magik in it.

It’s so sad to see who have become our children’s heroes.. all make believe fantasy stuff.

Maybe that’s another reason why I have a difficult time with the whole world of fantasy. It takes adults and children away from what really matters ( learning skills, studying, helping others) The amount of time spent on gaming ( with very dark themes) as well as watching shows with similar themes is increasing and to me that is showing that the darker entities of this world are indeed using their power , especially regarding children.

I'm not in total disagreement with what you said. I just don't see it as being something that's actually harmful. The shows are meant for entertainment and if children enjoy watching them, mission accomplished. It's the parents' job to guide their children in the right direction in all aspects of life. That includes books, shows, and toys. If they're concerned with any aspect it's their parental obligation to address it in a way that best benefits the child.

That said, let's say that you do find yourself raising a child that can't see past that mentioned curtain to reality. There's definitely an issue you need to address. If you find that your child has set off on a quest to chase down that non-existent CGI magic. Address that issue too. You cannot however claim that nobody is special, though. Anyone that finds their child doing crap like that can rest assured that their child is definitely a little "special". In that "Well bless their heart" kinda way.

a reply to: NightSkyeB4Dawn

Superheroes have been around for decades and I don't think kids have ever felt inferior because of them.
Relax a bit and just enjoy the fiction.

a reply to: Sheye

I don't have a problem with children believing they have the power to overcome an obstacle in this world they believe is stronger than they are. I don't have a problem with them believing that power is something that is deep inside them that they never took advantage of before or didn't know they had the ability to do.

I just don't think it is fair to keep pushing the idea that they are the only person on the planet with that ability and that makes them "special".

Okay, clicking your heels three times and wishing, isn't always going to be the solution either but, at least in the story it worked only after ripping away the curtain and coming face to face with the lies that held them hostage.

a reply to: NightSkyeB4Dawn

This is actually a quote from The Incredibles.

a reply to: NightSkyeB4Dawn

Sure "its all about the children" as per quotes from the Soccer Moms of the past along with their patsy daddies. Now look at the world to day. Think about this when your strapped to the gurney 30 years from now at the Vets office as you have been designated "useless" to society and are put "to sleep". Don't think it will happen? Sure? So why all of the attacks on Christians and their religion.

1. Look at all of the cars and trucks. Can you distinguish between just who's who.

2. Protect the nerds? Sure they really amount to basement terrorism.

3. Can I click my heels three time and as a male wish I want to be sexy girl for the moment to use female bathroom. For to do whatever; Right?

Filth

I think some are making the mistake of believing I am knocking movies, magic, and stories about super heroes. It is the lack of balance in the offerings that I am speaking of.

Why is it so hard for all the things that are passed off as spectacular in those stories, to have been done by an ordinary human child? A child with determination, wit, courage, and discernment?

Is it because we sell them short? That we don't believe they have the ability to work out obstacles, unless they are special, or have to use a force outside of themselves like magic?

If we are going to bombard them with the idea that they really can be and do anything, why aren't we pushing more realistic and achievable ways it can be done.

Fantasy and fun are fine. I just think we could use a little more realism in the mix.

You're UNIQUE!


Just like everyone else...

" All of it make believe and no chance of being real. I still do".
Good for you. For Eons people have been looking for magic, literally for thousands of years. Many learned slight of hand or tricksters, but never do I believe has there ever been Real Magic.

If someone had, it would be worth a kings ransom. Just like a 'Genie" the whole thing is simply tales of the whimsical.

Magic would be worth more than gold, or any earthly thing.

a reply to: Lazarus Short

You will get no argument from me.

For many, being unique does not bring them satisfaction or make them feel adequate, because they believe there is something else they are missing, that something that will make them special.

As #Anathros eluded to, special can also have a negative connotation, but negative or positive, the quest for that title can still sometimes cause some folk misery.

a reply to: NightSkyeB4Dawn
If you transpose this into the real world (without magic) it goes like this.
The basis of the supposed New World Order, The Illuminati and the Eugenics movement is the speciality of the members being superior to the rest, air breathers, useless feeders ETC.
They strive for the time when the useless ones are eliminated and therein lie the rub. Because when that time arrives, with just them on the Earth (Oh and their servants) having a million, having a billion or having a trillion wont be special at all.

Frankly I worry more about kids wanting to become a celebrity or an influencer when asked what they want to do with their lives.

a reply to: MindBodySpiritComplex

I expect kids to be fans of those that they see. Why else are they looking at them in the first place? They have to be displaying something that is notable, or maybe they would be doing something else with their time.

Over a million people watching and talking about a common person somewhere that said something or accidentally achieved something, that made people all around the world watch and talk about them. MSM gets in on the act and that 15 minutes of fame gets stretched out to weeks, months, maybe even more. All because of the real magic of the internet.

With the right luck, and right timing, they can become a celebrity or an influencer. Even though I would hope they would strive for something a little more firmly established, reliable, and steady, at least they have a snowball's chance in Hell of making it happen.

The personal explanation/conclusion I got out of things like Xena/Hercules, 80's/90's Disney, etc growing up was don't settle for ordinary, that's what everybody already IS by default and not many will try to push for better, thus reach for that ultra-high bar zone and go for it -- make something of yourself others will want to emulate for the own betterment. Awesomeness is a small club to kids, and it's a nice kick to the ass for motivation.

The fact OP never managed to come to that conclusion is a bit hard to wrap my mind around. It's not exactly like it was/is some buried sooper seekrit message.

originally posted by: Nyiah
The personal explanation/conclusion I got out of things like Xena/Hercules, 80's/90's Disney, etc growing up was don't settle for ordinary, that's what everybody already IS by default and not many will try to push for better, thus reach for that ultra-high bar zone and go for it -- make something of yourself others will want to emulate for the own betterment. Awesomeness is a small club to kids, and it's a nice kick to the ass for motivation.

The fact OP never managed to come to that conclusion is a bit hard to wrap my mind around. It's not exactly like it was/is some buried sooper seekrit message.

.. and why is being ordinary by default so bad ? What is the big push to have exemplary kids that others can look up to to emulate ? Ego ? Sure.. try hard and do your best, but everyone has different strengths and weaknesses and some of the wisest people on this planet came from very humble beginnings, stayed humble and with simple jobs offered more to humanity in the way of helping than many ‘reach for the top’ success stories.

The lyrics for the song Simple Man come to mind here..

May I also ask how all this awesomeness you were exposed to in cartoons directly affected the choices and aspirations you had for your own life ?

a reply to: Nyiah

I did make a distinction between how we processed what we saw when we were using our imaginations when stimulated by what we read, by cartoons, and fantasy in the past.

The level of technology, CGI, and placement of the delivery devices in the hands of children before they can even talk, is what causes me concern about where all this new exposure to so much fantasy will lead.

a reply to: Sheye

May I also ask how all this awesomeness you were exposed to in cartoons directly affected the choices and aspirations you had for your own life ?

I know you didn't ask me this question, but it made me think.

I was a big reader. I was never really hooked on TV, but I did, and I still like movies. Even the bad ones. Eraserhead being one of my favorite bad movies. Please don't ask why? I don't really know why. I never liked comic books. My brother was the comic book fanatic, and continued buying comic books up to the time he died, at the age 50 years old.

The only book that I can say that really motivated me was "Wuthering Heights". Not because of Heathcliff, but because of the moors. It became my life's dream to walk on the moors at night. I was finally able to do that around the age 40.

My life motivations came mostly from what was around me. Not from what was there, but what wasn't. I think the only other books that strongly motivated me, was the Sears Roebuck and Montgomery Wards catalogs.

I am the oldest of ten children. I spent a lot of time reading fairy tale and fantasy to my siblings. Times were very different then, and it was very easy to separate fantasy from reality, because reality was something that was ever present and staring you in the face.

I don't want children not to dream and have aspirations, I just don't want them bogged down by a virtual world that will keep them from ever reaching them.

originally posted by: Sheye

originally posted by: Nyiah
The personal explanation/conclusion I got out of things like Xena/Hercules, 80's/90's Disney, etc growing up was don't settle for ordinary, that's what everybody already IS by default and not many will try to push for better, thus reach for that ultra-high bar zone and go for it -- make something of yourself others will want to emulate for the own betterment. Awesomeness is a small club to kids, and it's a nice kick to the ass for motivation.

The fact OP never managed to come to that conclusion is a bit hard to wrap my mind around. It's not exactly like it was/is some buried sooper seekrit message.

.. and why is being ordinary by default so bad ? What is the big push to have exemplary kids that others can look up to to emulate ? Ego ? Sure.. try hard and do your best, but everyone has different strengths and weaknesses and some of the wisest people on this planet came from very humble beginnings, stayed humble and with simple jobs offered more to humanity in the way of helping than many ‘reach for the top’ success stories.

The lyrics for the song Simple Man come to mind here..

May I also ask how all this awesomeness you were exposed to in cartoons directly affected the choices and aspirations you had for your own life ?

Why be another boring cookie cutter when you can stretch your proverbial wings and be more? Ordinary is...ordinary. There's nothing remarkable or different about it. Suggesting to someone that settling for never trying for more is not setting much of an example.

It is a point of view that impacts us in that it inspires anyone with enough stones to push back against those willing to scowl & bash stepping out of that clone line and be something/someone better. If the nudge someone needed way back when to take initiative came from watching Captain Planet, so be it, who cares? It's the resulting action that counts. Star Trek set a raging lifelong wildfire for me for science, and especially astronomy.

90's Flipper, as corny as hell as it was after season 1, set me on a path to marine biology that damn near became a career, and landed me as a teen on the candidate list for schooling directly from a local marine lab in FL. I would have been earning college credits years ahead of time, through hands-on work with professionals out in the field rather than professors in a room. I missed the mark by a hair and lost out in testing a few years in a row, MANY repeat student applicants did, it was coveted and not a many spaces were available for the dozens that applied, but that damn show inspired that route in me.

No, I'm not in it as a career today, but that boiled down to poor advice from others, and not following my gut when it counted. I don't regret the left field change I ended up with, and a career wouldn't be compatible with where I am now. Wife and mom are the two most important jobs out there, IMO, and nothing will change my mind. I still have the satisfaction of knowing that not only did I buckle down and try, but I also had it within reach WELL before others in college would have been doing that level of interning. That's what counts, and that one cheesy TV show lead me there. What can others, or even you, say about inspiration and stepping out of the standard line to take a chance?

a reply to: NightSkyeB4Dawn

I don't want children not to dream and have aspirations, I just don't want them bogged down by a virtual world that will keep them from ever reaching them.

I very much agree with this and see too much of the virtual world interfering with real aspirations that matter much more to society.

I also want children to appreciate that it takes all sorts of blue collar workers and those that do grunt work to make this world go round. ALL should be equally appreciated.

What I don’t want to see is children playing daring games like they are some sort of super hero. Too many are plummeting to their deaths.

Example of foolishness..
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