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Canned gravy is evil!

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posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 10:59 AM
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meh.. just not worth it.. done with this backpedaling idiotic thread.

See ya.. wouldn’t wanna be ya 😆
edit on 29-11-2019 by Sheye because: (no reason given)




posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 11:12 AM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: Flyingclaydisk
Sincerely,
Lame Humor Members United


I eat children. But never with canned gravy because I'm a food shaming food snob.









You disappoint. I felt sure you had the very best roasted peacock yesterday or something. I mean, aren't children a bit routine for you?



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 11:17 AM
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originally posted by: Sheye
meh.. just not worth it.. done with this backpedaling idiotic thread.

See ya.. wouldn’t wanna be ya 😆



You won't be missed



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 11:26 AM
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a reply to: Sheye

Oooo, "your kind" what was that about not being all judgmental again?

Not like we walk up to folks and play food police. We leave to Michelle Obama and vegans, but mostly vegans.

You want your canned fat/salt (what I call the fast food gravy from the local Pizza Ranch) have at. It isn't terrible, but it does taste like heavily, heavily salted fat glop without much character.



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 11:34 AM
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"Pull up a chair there, my good young man, I want to tell you a story about the old days gone past.

Way back in the second decade of the 21st century, when people still drove these things called cars and didn't have these damn Alexa-9000 chips embedded in their foreheads, there were the Great Canned Gravy Wars of 2019. It was a terrible time; there was this thing then, they called it the interwebz, and people used to hurl insults at each other with it. It was a very dark time. As I recall, it was the day before the last Thursday in November of 2019 when it all started.

This was all long before the Great MSM Consolidation, the Basement Couch Revolution and the United Socialist Federation of The Google. Back then this was a continent known as "North America" and it was a land of three countries; Mexico, Canada and the United States of America. It was a brave and proud frontier.

Back then, just prior to the Great MSM Consolidation, the world media had whipped everyone into a complete frenzy. Burritos from Mexico flooded the country and were being held in cages. A great Orange light cast an eerie glow from the east. Some called it The Orange Man. Worse, people were so divided...about everything...they could fight over just about everything. Just when everyone thought there was nothing left to go to war over the "Gauntlet of Gravy" was laid down. It was a terrible and wretched time. There were many casualties. The war waged on for decades, and along the way the ancient scrolls (and thumb drives) containing the alchemy of gravy making were lost.

From that point onward, and forever more, canned gravy became the gold standard by which all things of value were measured. Not long afterwards, the Couch Warrior insurgents, in concert with the MSM, launched a coup attempt on the world from the basements of their Mom's houses. Armed only with turkey drumsticks, canned gravy and video game controllers, they set out to rule the world. The great Google catacombs under the streets of society, where The Google itself lived and had mined personal information for eons was preparing an attack of its own, unbeknownst to all.

I think it was about the 12th of December or so when it all began. The infamous Twelve Days of The Google had begun. By Christmas of that same year The Google had prevailed. Christmas became what we now know as 'Festivus', and as everyone knows, all Festivus poles are purchased from Amazon via The Google. %...and a Google in a Pear tree!%

So there you have it; it all started with the Great Canned Gravy Wars of 2019, my boy. And your great grandfather was right there on the front lines, by golly!

The End


edit on 11/29/2019 by Flyingclaydisk because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 11:46 AM
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a reply to: Flyingclaydisk


Bwhahahah

Lemme guess, a second battle front opened up in 2020 between the manual and electric can opener factions?



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 11:55 AM
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Good lord are we on day three Gravy Wars




posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 11:58 AM
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a reply to: Bluntone22

I have kept a p-38 in my wallet just in case for about 25-27 years now.



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 11:59 AM
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a reply to: Ahabstar

Don't the propellers poke you in the butt?

Ha, had too



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 12:01 PM
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a reply to: Bluntone22

And others ask where I keep the spare mags.



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 12:31 PM
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originally posted by: Bluntone22
a reply to: Sheye

You are wrong..
I wrote the damn thread as a joke and everyone but you thinks it's funny.
You have that right of course but stop trying to tell everyone else what they find humorous.


There's always one Scrooge trying to bring everybody down. Bah! Humbug!



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 12:56 PM
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a reply to: Bluntone22

My in-laws weren't even aware that canned/jarred gravy is terrible. The forst time we spent Thanksgiving with them, I saw the jar of Heinz on the counter and knew right away I had to intervene or Thanksgiving would be ruined in its entirety. Not just dinner, the WHOLE weekend.

A few of them still wanted their flavorless brown goo, but those who used the real from-scratch gravy I made had their lives changed for the better that day and now ask to ensure I will be making the gravy every year.

I've noticed that with a lot of people in this "natural paradise" that is the far reaches of upper peninsula Michigan live almost entirely on processed food - outside of the fresh caught fish and vension. They think "just add water" to pancakes means "homemade/made from scratch."

Maybe its just their little neck of the woods, but I expected behaviors to be more like farm country here. Instead, its artificial and wasteful everything.
Natural beauty everywhere, but not a recycling bin in sight. Its a jarring dichotomy.

So, every time we come up to visit, we cringe as the garbage bins fill up with cardboard and plastic water bottles, and do our best to cook all of the meals.

Anyhow, I kind of went on an in-laws rant as we're on day 4 up here, but, yeah...canned gravy IS evil! As are powdered packets lol.



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 01:56 PM
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originally posted by: ketsuko
You disappoint. I felt sure you had the very best roasted peacock yesterday or something. I mean, aren't children a bit routine for you?


I made OrPiDo.

It's a ortolan, stuffed in a carrier pigeon, stuffed in a dodo. The more extinct the species is the better it tastes.



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 01:59 PM
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originally posted by: Sheye
meh.. just not worth it.. done with this backpedaling idiotic thread.

See ya.. wouldn’t wanna be ya 😆


It's cool, we'll try to suffer along with out your curmudgeoness.



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 03:23 PM
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a reply to: dogstar23

I know exactly what you mean.
Shopping carts full of "square" meals...boxes are square...lol

I'm not a food snob but I just don't understand why anybody would eat that stuff with the sodium content. I love the occasional $1 pound of hot dog dinner but not very often.



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 04:35 PM
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a reply to: ketsuko




You want your canned fat/salt (what I call the fast food gravy from the local Pizza Ranch) have at. It isn't terrible, but it does taste like heavily, heavily salted fat glop without much character.


I’ve been accused of missing the humour on this thread, but you have missed multiple posts on this thread of me saying this wasn’t about me using canned over making it from scratch. I prefer homemade gravy and I’m sure most people do. My point in all of this was the pettiness of a rant over canned gravy.

I already said I realized the word ‘evil’ was an exaggeration, but nobody ‘got’ my sarcasm in comparing it to rape and murder in my post.. instead I’m told to chill.

Don’t know why I bothered to explain that again but some people seem to have reading comprehension skills.🤷🏻‍♀️

ETA: I’m sorry I didn’t see all the so called humour in the OP, though I admit I knew the word evil was exaggeration and sarcasm. The rest of it seemed like a full on rant to me with no clear indication of it being a joke.


edit on 29-11-2019 by Sheye because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 10:04 PM
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a reply to: Sheye

Well, try harder before you go all SJW and get offended on behalf of legions of nameless others you are just sure are weeping into their gravy boats adding even more salt to the goo but who won't step up themselves. You're so very sure they exist because you got your knickers in a twist a can't just simpky admit this thread pisses you off ... no, that can't be it. You have to instead be crusading on behalf of the greater good of the nameless voiceless mass of others who just have to be as ticked off as you because that at least lets you keep moral superiority on your side. Otherwise, you'd just be a hacked off sourpuss.



posted on Nov, 29 2019 @ 11:00 PM
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a reply to: ketsuko

The only gravy boats are in the Gravy Navy.

You're either a gravy "can" or a gravy can't.

It's time to pick a side.



posted on Nov, 30 2019 @ 12:53 AM
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originally posted by: ketsuko
a reply to: Sheye

Well, try harder before you go all SJW and get offended on behalf of legions of nameless others you are just sure are weeping into their gravy boats adding even more salt to the goo but who won't step up themselves. You're so very sure they exist because you got your knickers in a twist a can't just simpky admit this thread pisses you off ... no, that can't be it. You have to instead be crusading on behalf of the greater good of the nameless voiceless mass of others who just have to be as ticked off as you because that at least lets you keep moral superiority on your side. Otherwise, you'd just be a hacked off sourpuss.



I did simply admit this thread pisses me off for what I see as condescending attitude. In a day and age when so many seriously bad things are being done by humans, I simply think it’s petty to criticize food choices. I’ll admit I had a knee jerk reaction to the OP’s alleged joke, which sounded so condescending to me that I just had to put in my two cents.. big mistake I guess.. considering I’m now considered as evil as a can of gravy.😆

... and yes.. it does appear I’ve taken up the championing of protecting the underdog in all sorts of scenarios. I don’t have a problem with that... if you do.. I guess that’s your problem. I amz what I amz and it will be God’s judgement I’m concerned about at the end of this journey.. certainly not anyone on ATS... as it should be for everyone here.

I’ll try not to care too much about the petty things.
edit on 30-11-2019 by Sheye because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 30 2019 @ 04:31 AM
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edit on 11/30/2019 by Flyingclaydisk because: (no reason given)




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