When leaves wave... The Gift

Ok, so lately I've been under alot of stress. The stress is what I'd consider above average in the percentile of a 100% range and I'm like at a 90% or higher in stress mode right now (who isn't though... right ?). This super stress has been going on for about 7 months or so now. Now before these 7 months there was stress then too, but it like tripled or quadrupled in these last 7 months. At first I cried alot, was angry... ya know normal emotional responses you'd expect in stress filled time periods. Then I got to a point that I could not cry anymore which was kinda awful. I'd want tears, because they make me feel better. Crying for me is a super powerful release of pent up emotions that need to get out and not crying is harmful. So i wanted the tears to roll but they weren't. They were all dried up and gone.

Now here recently though I've started to have bouts of hilarious thoughts that get me laughing hysterically. So now I've turned toward coping with laughter. It's like I get a thought about something and I just can't contain myself.

An example, the other day it was very windy as I was driving down the road. The wind wouldn't relent and it was this way all day. I hate wind... with a passion too. So i was like ugghh wind please stop. & being that we are in the season of fall, the leaves have made their way to the ground. Well the wind kept picking up the leaves and blowing them around like they do but this time they blew the leaves in a straight line, like a parade, in front of my vehicle, low to the ground not lifted up in the air. They hastily marched by, hundreds of them, waving at me. For real it was a parade of leaves. They didn't blow in the whiper whirl twirling fashion you'd normally see. All the rubies, jades, emeralds, ambers and bronzes running by in a straight line looking at me and waving, giving a nod in my direction. It was as if this was winds way of talking to me or something. It made be smile but also it got me laughing so hard as I began the little story in my head that it brought tears to my face, I just couldn't contain myself at that point. It came at a time when I really needed the laugh. So I call it a gift... sent my way when i really needed it. The wind was talking to me I thought, and it was being kind of sarcastic too I thought, sending me a nod right after I asked it to stop. OMG I'm really losing it now I was thinking.

These episodes of laughter are absolutely wonderful too, they get so emotionally charged I will laugh until i tear up and they make me feel so much better so I'm not complaining about it at all. I've kinda labeled it my temporary loony laughter. & after the laughter gets so hard, here are the tears I've been wishing for so I could release this pent up emotion. So what I feel is going on here is my mind has found a way to release the emotion subconsciously.

I'm like by myself in my own mind and the thoughts are so funny and the laugh is genuinely good. So I call it the gift because its so needed right now. One can just hope I'm not coming across as a loony tune to outsiders who may have to witness these laughter episodes. Gosh... wheh.

Anyways... if anyone has any of their own laughter stories they would be great to hear. All I can do is hope I'm not losing it mentally and this is a normal coping mechanism my mind is engaging.

leolady

a reply to: leolady

I live in the woods and I have had the trees do this for me.

It is was a very still hot day. Since I was walking under the canopy it was a bit cooler. Feeling a bit of ennui, I started talking to the trees. Then it looked like they started playing a game with me.

Keep in mind that the wind was not blowing. A copse of tree were I was standing bent over, so I thought, "Good, a breeze!" but no breeze reached me. I teasingly said, "Are you bending your heads because you agree with me?" Again, they bent over. Again, no breeze. I asked a couple more questions, all with yes answers. So I said, "I bet you want me to shut up."

Imagine my shock when the trees bent in the opposite direction, like they were shaking their head "NO!"

I laughed so hard. Needless to say, no more ennui!

a reply to: leolady

Hi L:L.
Embrace, accept, love the laughter.

It's ridiculous to 'hate' the wind, no ?
How in the heck could we justify our right to protest the reality of : this that is ?

Accept this, here, now. Whatever the heck it is.
Feel the release of laughter, as you stop resisting this that just is.

Perhaps the stress you are feeling, is like the tension of those supposed tectonic-plates, before an earthquake ?

No resistance.
Let it be.

a reply to: NightSkyeB4Dawn

Oooh i love the story of your experience ! That is so awesome. Nature can be so amazing.

leolady

a reply to: Nothin

Yes, It is kinda ridiculous to hate the wind and a negative feeling to have toward it, but I do hate to be wind blown, especially if its cold and even worse if its wet. It like hurts me when its cold or wet, but I guess I need to give more love to the wind since it put on a little show for me the other day.

leolady

a reply to: leolady

Meditation is the best way. Silence your mind and relax. Practice makes perfect.

“A time to weep,
And a time to laugh;
A time to mourn,
And a time to dance;”

This was beautiful, thank you for sharing..

Laughter is my best coping mechanism... and humor is my favorite art!

‭‭

Your story made me smile LeoLady.. all except the part where you are experiencing extreme stress.
I’m happy you have been given the gift of laughter to help you, as well a creative mind that sees leaves marching in a row and waving. That was precious to read.

Hoping your gift of laughter will stay close to you the remainder of your years here on earth.

a reply to: leolady

The past is present in the here and now, as memories that are just happening.
Am wondering what your experience with this is, as far as feeling hot or cold goes ?

For me: memories of over one year, seem to have no link to whether there was a feeling of hot or cold associated with it.
Seems wind as well.

As an example: was lamenting one of my old cars while chatting with a friend, going over it's advantages.
Then he says to me: did you forget that you had no floor heating for two winters, and always had wet frozen feet ?
Yup: the memory of cold toes was gone!
Just can't remember what it was like, to feel hot, or cold.
For that matter: also the wind, and whether or not was battling a head-cold.

How about you ?

a reply to: Nothin

Well I immediately quit thinking about the wind and its effects that weren't so fun as I began to watch the little spectacle leaf show being put on display for me. So as far as memory goes, the leaf show will be the memory for sure. Its why it was a gift.

leolady

a reply to: leolady

Well that's a wonderful way to think of it !
A beautiful and unique experience, received as a gift.

Might all memories be gifts, in their own way ?