here goes... i saw the post about the radio Dj visiting Area 51 attempting to do a live broadcast, and having his "live on air" signal scrambled.
Pretty good story, but in my eyes was weak!! either no one has any real guts these days, or i'm just a serious risk-taker.
In every post i have read, not just here, but on any website for that matter, everyone stops at "the sign", and waits for the
Wackenhut security guards to come and hassle them. not me, i drove from Pennsylvania to Nevada in an attempt to live out the american dream; winning
millions in vegas, and like the rest of us, i failed horribly. so i picked up the pieces, and decided to make another trip to the E.T. highway while i
was in the general area. i wasn't going back to PA with my only two stories being about the brothels and why i couldn't afford to pay rent this
month. there had to be more, and we were going to make sure there was.
i barreled past the infamous "restricted area" signs with two of my buddies... but before i ruin the best part of the story, i am
going to start from the begining.. well almost the begining. i'll leave all of the lifeless details out in an attempt to save everyone from boredom,
and start from my second visit to "The Little AleInn" .
i remember seeing what looked like someone being pulled over ahead, and i knew i was finally there, for those of you who have visited
the resturant, you know what im talking about. And for those of you who don't, they have about an eight foot, man made UFO as a part of their sign
out front, with blinking blue, red and green lights which is visible for a mile or two. we stopped in, and all got something to eat,( i got down on
the trendy alien burger), read a few of the many anti bush, anti everything, bumper stickers that are affixed to the bar-side wall. lastly,we checked
out some of the truly amazing ufo pictures that clutter the back wall. really neat stuff. it's amazing seeing some of the things that were once
flying around out there. Plus, it shines a whole new light on the subject when you are able to look at actual 5x7 glossy prints. before we left, we
were talking to the heavy blonde lady that works there who told us we were idiots for even attempting what we had told her we were going to do, but
had asked us to come back if we made it back (giggle giggle). the funniest part was, in an attempt to promote our delinquancy, she handed us a
pamphlet with dead on directions for finding the black mailbox, and the road aptly named "black mailbox road" (the originality of that just kills
so, we were on our way. after a good drive, we had arrived to our destination. i was gung freaking ho about driving at the highest
possible rate of speed past these signs, even we were all thoroughly convinced we were getting shot. i figured this was a better alternative than
having to go back to PA to face the wrath of my evil significant other when i break the news to her that i am down four grand. nonetheless i stepped
on the gas. dust flying, all three of us shaking, and at least one of us deficating ourselves (still to this day the other two won't admit to it) we
flew past the signs. looking back through the dust i could see three white cherokee's gaining on us, and up ahead, was a fence with a guard hut. i
could see that from this direction, there was more backup on its way. a helicopter, came barreling in and was, right above us. it was then that i
stopped. not only because of the maroon trucks flying towards me from the front, the jeeps from behind, and the helicopters above, but because my
tires were FLAT (i'll get into that in a few, hang tight).
these guys all out surrounded my car. it looked like something out of worlds wildest police chases. within seconds they had
every one of my doors ripped open, and all of us on the ground at rifle-point. someone was stepping on my neck, i had a set of knees painfully placed
directly on my back in the worst position imaginable. these guys weren't playing around. from what i could see, and also from what i was told after
the fact, they were the roughest on me, which makes perfect sense, it was my foot on the gas pedal. we were all cuffed, and forced to lay on the
ground faces in the dirt (i'm talking looking at, almost tasting the ground, with no choice but to comply)
while they ripped through my car like i was the unibomber.. they questioned us a little bit, but didn't seem like they were too
interested in anything we had to say other than whether or not we had weapons, and what the we thought we were doing. after an hour, yes an hour, we
were all greeted by four different sherriff's units three of which transported us back to the vegas area. aside from the questioning we all had
gotten during our seperate drives back to the barracks (which was most likely to see if when we were really interrogated we changed our stories at
all, smart cops) this is when the real questiong began.
we were met by FBI agents at the station who seemed thouroughly angry. the first thing out of their mouths (to me) was "i would
have f'ing shot all three of you. you're lucky i'm not employed there" . we were questioned, nothing too serious when it came to the questioning,
and all charged with felony defiant trespass. at the time all i could think was "great, im an idiot, i got only five hundred feet past where i was
allowed to be, and now we are all going to be convicted felons.
we were transported to jail in las vegas (this city has officially, at this point, gotten the best of me) where i spent that night,
saturday night, and sunday night. monday morning, we were all arraigned, and the judge lectured us about government property being private for reasons
of security, once again we were all told we should have been shot, and all charges were dropped with our written word that if we were to ever come to
nevada again, we would not leave vegas city limits, of course they had no way of ever enforcing this, but to say the least we were greatfull.
now, outside of the courtroom, the sherriff that had driven my friend Adam to the barracks came up to me and had told me my
car was at impound in vegas and had told me which busses to take to get there. the guy was nice enough to get us tokens (which i actually saved for
the sentimental value, and two of which are now a part of my keychain) for las vegas transit.
we got to impound, at which point we had to come up with 370.00 (luckily my friends weren't as stupid with their gambling habits
as was i) to get my car out, and another 240.00 to have someone drive to the impound yard and repair all four of my tires... i hate vegas, honestly, i
back to the tire situation, apparantly it is possible to hide those one way spike strips on a dirt road? too bad i had no prior
knowledge of this, unlike every other of the 11 vehicles that were there, right behind me that day. now, back to the impound yard, we all threw down,
payed my fees, and did an inventory of the car. all of our digital cameras were there, but the memory cards weren't. my video camera was there, but
guess what wasn't ? thats right! but, not just the tape that was in it was gone, so were two other tapes. all three of which had nothing on them from
area 51, i taped a little bit of us driving down 375 toward the little aleInn, and maybe five minutes inside of the restaurant, but that was it, and
they took them all! our clothes as well as all of the rest of our belongings were all over the back seat. i guess that they felt the need to
disrespect me in the same manner that i disrespected them. my tires were soon fixed, and we were soon on our way.
i'll leave the rest of that drive of shame out, and leave you all with this.. i honestly have no real idea what goes on
behind those fences at the infamous area-51, nor will i ever. and neither will you. was it worth it? ummmmm, sure, i guess so. i was probably the
first one to ever attempt what i attempted, and in my mind, now that im looking back at it, i think of our trip as legendary. just please don't be an
idiot. if you ever get the chance to head to area-51, go for it. just be smart. i'm living proof that they aren't going to shoot you. but they are
above the law, and they will definitely rough you up. me personally, i will never go back to vegas. that town raped me in every way imaginable. in
fact the name Las Vegas will never leave my mouth again, but the story of my area 51 experience definitely will, for years to come
[edit on 7-3-2005 by matthew williams]