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reply posted on 5-3-2005 @ 10:12 AM by RANT
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Originally posted by Angelic1
I would be interested in reading both men and women's opinion in this regard? Is abortion really a woman thing? Or do men have rights to their
children prior to birth?

Only one person can have the ultimate decision. One has to be at the top. In the thousands of years prior to the SCOTUS legalization of abortion
(technically a woman's right to medical privacy actually) the woman, her womb, the potential child, etc. were all the sole propety of the man. Even
in pre-Constantine Rome when abortion (even infanticide) was a long standing legal tradition it was at the leisure of the man's decision exclusively,
and most likely legal because of a strong deference to men's wishes.
One's medical decisions aren't a democracy of two. Ultimately, in any conflict of interest, one must supercede the other. So someone has to
be at the top of a woman's reproductivity. If not the women carrying the child as we have deemed to be the case in our enlightened age, then who?
Put the man back in charge? The government? Religion? What a horrible and unconstitutional idea.
This is a man's opinion.
Interesting side note:
Originally posted by Angelic1
Post-abortion counseling services are seeing an increasing number of men come forward, grieving their aborted children. Many of the same dynamics of
post-abortion distress that we see in women are are also present in men. " 
Perhaps it's the huge influx of our tax dollars into these "services" and similar outreach and witnessing inititives. I've posted previously on
exampes of "groups" comprised of little more than a man with a Bible, a website and address getting federal grants of $800,000 to "counsel" on
medical services in his town.
Those convinced there's a secret shadow government at work would be well served to visit the White House website and follow the links directly
to it.
Faithbasedcommunityinititives.org indexes the "God Departments" in most major
arms of government.
It's pretty much adding an "/fbci" to once secular departments like Health and Human Services (God Dept.),
Housing and Urban Development (God Dept.), US Dept. of Labor (God
Dept.), Department of Justice (Tribulation Force), etc.
So as to your statement about the "law being a powerful teacher," um yeah. Fear not I guess. That crazy little delapidated shack on the corner in
your town with the Virgin Mary statues, Christmas lights and sign that says "Free Abortion Counseling" is THE LAW now.
[edit on 5-3-2005 by RANT]
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reply posted on 5-3-2005 @ 11:27 AM by KKing123
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I know that many of you have made it a point to say that "not ALL men are horrible people who leave" but i just wanted to give an example that
backed it up.
me
2 months ago a switch flipped inside my wife (that's really what it seemed like) and her 2 major disorders (one of which we didn't know about and
the other we ididn't know how serious it was) kicked in. Bi polar disorder (didnt know it was that serious) and paranoid schizophrenia (didnt know
about at all). She lost control of herself, kept abandoning us, treating us badly, sleeping with my best friend. Eventually i had to take Michael
and move back in with my parents so she couldn't hurt him. She's getting treated now (though our relationship didn't survive, we're getting
divorced, she's now with my former best friend) but until, or unless she is successfully treated, she isn't allowed to be alone with our son, or see
him for extended periods, which means I am now a single parent, and effectively his only parent. And i have stepped up to that responsibility
happily.
just think about that before any of you make alot of accussations about how ALL men are.
for the record, my opinion is also that the man should have rights as well, if you couldn't tell that by now.
[edit on 5-3-2005 by KKing123]
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reply posted on 5-3-2005 @ 03:37 PM by John Nada
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Originally posted by KKing123
just think about that before any of you make alot of accussations about how ALL men are.
for the record, my opinion is also that the man should have rights as well, if you couldn't tell that by now.

That's the sad part, the second it is deemed she is free of her disorders to a point where she's stable, she will probably get automatic permanent
custody of your child, you being the weekender. I don't see how that's right.
I'm sorry to hear about your troubles, I hope everything is working out ok.
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reply posted on 5-3-2005 @ 08:12 PM by Reaganwasourgreatest
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Let have some discussion here that is related.
Suppose a young man is dating this girl that has told him she was on the pill. No suppose she is not actually taking the pill but wants to get
pregnant to trap him into paying child support, marrying her, or the girl just wants to be a mom with someone to love and receive love from. Now the
boy has other plans and paying child support for 18 years was not one of them. That amount of money would directly effect his life and maybe his body.
He might have to work two jobs just to support his self and his child. The emotional health of this young man could also be severly compromised. He
might even become suicidal. It also might affect his love life as well.
So should he have the right to make her go down to the Plan Parenthood
(sic) Clinic and have an abortion so his life is not ruined?
Personally, I do not believe anyone should have the legal right to take another human's life except as an act of self defense. That is how some of
these feminists describe that child, as an unwanted invader into their body and that they have the right to protect themselves from
that................
Again, what about the guy?
My logic is not necessarily your logic
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reply posted on 5-3-2005 @ 08:15 PM by LadyV
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It doesn't matter whether she said she was on the pill or not....if he doesn't want a child...he better take care of it himself or be more selective
in his sexual activity....JM not so humble O
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reply posted on 6-3-2005 @ 01:13 AM by Reaganwasourgreatest
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Hell must hath frozen over for me to agree with LadyV
My response to that young man was... Why would your wife lie to you about being on the pill..Oh you are not married? Then what were you doing have sex
with someone other than your wife? You reap what you sow young man!
Just because something is legal does not mean there are no consequences for your sin. All can be forgiven but consequences are lifelong.
Likewise there is consequences for deliberately killing children or shedding Innocent blood.
Ps 106:36-39
36 They worshiped their idols,
which became a snare to them.
37 They sacrificed their sons
and their daughters to demons.
38 They shed innocent blood,
the blood of their sons and daughters,
whom they sacrificed to the idols of Canaan,
and the land was desecrated by their blood.
39 They defiled themselves by what they did;
by their deeds they prostituted themselves.
NIV
It is because of this, we nutty Christians are so passionate.
Jer 26:12-15
12 Then Jeremiah said to all the officials and all the people: "The LORD sent me to prophesy against this house and this city all the things you have
heard. 13 Now reform your ways and your actions and obey the LORD your God. Then the LORD will relent and not bring the disaster he has pronounced
against you. 14 As for me, I am in your hands; do with me whatever you think is good and right. 15 Be assured, however, that if you put me to death,
you will bring the guilt of innocent blood on yourselves and on this city and on those who live in it, for in truth the LORD has sent me to you to
speak all these words in your hearing."
NIV
You might notice redundancy here
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reply posted on 6-3-2005 @ 01:27 AM by IBM
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Hey, wait a minute, the mother gets a say, the father might get a say, what about the baby? Does the baby have to say please dont murder me.
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reply posted on 6-3-2005 @ 04:17 AM by riley
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reply posted on 6-3-2005 @ 07:12 AM by dawnstar
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Does the Baby of the capability to have a say??? OR are you suggesting that a legal guardian be appointed to represent the baby. It's been my
experience that many of these legal guardians aren't really placing the kid's well being on the top of their list now, when those they are
representing are capable of talking and telling them what they want. All that seems to happen in the family courts now is that all the lawyers meet
behind closed doors and make their deals, and then if your lucky, they might decide to come tell you what they have decided, or, the first you might
hear about it is in the courtroom, as the judge is telling you what the decision is.
SO, let's say that we did manage to work it out so that somehow, both mother and father could at least have an equal influence in the decision.....as
long as it didn't risk the health of the mother.
So, the little tiny baby is now just as much the "property" of the father, as the mother. Does he now have legal say over just what the baby
"eats", or just how much excercise the mother does or doesn't do during pregnancy? Can he insist that she only listen to classical music 24 hrs a
day? What about emotional stress, should he be able to shield his baby from the stress that is induced in the mother when she watches all that
horrible, scary news?
Protecting the father's rights involving the abortion issue would be easier than dealing with the backlash afterward.....and well, the courts are all
overloaded as it is. Should they really be hassled with the question of weather or not a dozen chocolate doughnuts every day is really healthy for
the baby?
[edit on 6-3-2005 by dawnstar]
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reply posted on 6-3-2005 @ 07:39 AM by Partyof1
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We wouldn't have to face virtually ANY of these unfortunate issues if people were capable of accepting personal responsibility for their actions.
Nothing like good ole-fashioned morals and values.
Does anyone remember those archaic ideas? Unfortunately, not many these days.
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reply posted on 6-3-2005 @ 07:45 AM by LadyV
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Originally posted by Reaganwasourgreatest
Hell must hath frozen over for me to agree with LadyV

Isn't it the truth...but one does not have to be of any particular faith, to have morals and decency, and to take responsibility for their
actions.....today's world is too caught up in the if "I" want to, I can" mentality and shrugging off responsibility.....
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reply posted on 6-3-2005 @ 07:59 AM by Mayet
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Angellic....the father should have had the baby in his custody if the mother didn't want it.
No a father does not have the ultimate choice over abortion
No a mother should not get child support and so on. She wants to raise it alone, support herself then.
In our country the government is so nice it pays money to single mothers that is quite enough not to need the father to give his money to raise a
child, often being raised by another man with the mother.
It ultimatly depends on each situation, what is right for one, is not always right for another.
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reply posted on 6-3-2005 @ 09:52 AM by RANT
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Let's Do It.
Originally posted by Partyof1
We wouldn't have to face virtually ANY of these unfortunate issues if people were capable of accepting personal responsibility for their actions.
Nothing like good ole-fashioned morals and values.
Does anyone remember those archaic ideas? Unfortunately, not many these days. 
How "ole-fashioned" do you want to get? I think your presumption of "archaic" might be a little off. But I'm game.
Anything pre-Eisenhower is fine with me with the exclusion of post Constantine Christian State Rome.
Abortion Has Always Been With Us
 In 1955, the anthropologist George Devereux demonstrated that abortion has been practised in almost all human communities from the earliest
times.1 The patterns of abortion use, in hundreds of societies around the world since before recorded history, have been strikingly similar. Women
faced with unwanted pregnancies have turned to abortion, regardless of religious or legal sanction and often at considerable risk.2 Used to deal with
upheavals in personal, family, and community life, abortion has been called “a fundamental aspect of human behaviour”.3
In primitive tribal societies, abortions were induced by using poisonous herbs, sharp sticks, or by sheer pressure on the abdomen until vaginal
bleeding occurred. Abortion techniques are described in the oldest known medical texts.2 The ancient Chinese and Egyptians had their methods and
recipes to cause abortion, and Greek and Roman civilizations considered abortion an integral part of maintaining a stable population. Ancient
instruments, such as the ones found at Pompeii and Herculaneum, were much like modern surgical instruments. The Greeks and Romans also had various
poisons administered in various ways, including through tampons.
Socrates,4 Plato and Aristotle2 were all known to suggest abortion. Even Hippocrates, who spoke against abortion because he feared injury to the
woman, recommended it on occasion by prescribing violent exercises.2 Roman morality placed no social stigma on abortion.
Early Christians condemned abortion, but did not view the termination of a pregnancy to be an abortion before "ensoulment", the definition of when
life began in the womb. Up to 400 AD., as the relatively few Christians were widely scattered geographically, the actual practice of abortion among
Christians probably varied considerably and was influenced by regional customs and practices. 
Let's get real archaic shall we? When man was truly free. Pre- Church States. Of course, we've tried since with a little thing called
America. A secular dream of our enlightened founding fathers. I'm obviously not saying they were perfect or envisioned women to have the right to
medical privacy or reproductive sovereignty any more than they wanted women to vote, or blacks to not be slaves... but they did have the right
"archaic" ideas of kicking the moral authoritarians out of our lives.
Interesting summary from that study (which goes through all religions and parts of the globe in history)...
 SUMMARY
Abortion is not a modern aberration, but a practice common to human communities throughout history. Historically, early abortion was tolerated
by the Church, and for centuries it was not punished under English common law. Nations which have passed abortion laws have done so for a variety of
reasons, such as concern for women’s health, the demands of the medical profession, demographic fears, religious beliefs, etc.
Restrictive abortion legislation does not lead to a low abortion rate. The data from Romania when it prohibited abortion, from Italy before its
liberalized abortion law, and from Latin America, the Middle East, Africa and other developing countries show that the abortion rate is high in
countries in which abortion is illegal. Whether legal or not, every year millions of individual women around the world— of all cultural, religious,
and economic backgrounds— seek out abortion when they cannot carry a pregnancy to term.197 History has proved that laws do not stop
abortion. 
[edit on 6-3-2005 by RANT]
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reply posted on 6-3-2005 @ 10:24 AM by Uncle Joe
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At the end of the day a womens body is her own and only she can decide what to do with it.
As a man i would not allow someone else to dictate to me what to do with my body, i have the right to make all descicions regarding my medical
situation.
If men are allowed to dictate to women whether they have to have abortions or not then women should be allowed to insist that men have vasectomies as
this could help prevent the need for more abortions.
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reply posted on 7-3-2005 @ 08:08 PM by Reaganwasourgreatest
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Joe shoot up heroin then or masterbate in public. Your body, just do not get caught huh? Those things do not hurt anyone else. It might offend some
though like killing babies instead of using birth control?
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reply posted on 7-3-2005 @ 10:20 PM by SonofSpy
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Of Course Men Dont Matter When It comes To Abortion!
Men are always the aggresor. Always. This is why almost all the decisions concerning abortion are left up to the woman. If it was left up soley to a
mans carnal instincts the abortion rate in this country(Amerika)would be ten times higher. Peel the mental layers back and we(men)are brutal animals
that would eat our young if we had too just like wild animals. We may have the intellegence but we are carnal beasts just like rabid wolves. If us men
dont kill us all first it will be tens of thousands of years before men evolve above the carnal level of predatory wild animals. Deal with it. Thank
you...
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reply posted on 8-3-2005 @ 10:39 AM by Uncle Joe
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Originally posted by Reaganwasourgreatest
Joe shoot up heroin then or masterbate in public. Your body, just do not get caught huh? Those things do not hurt anyone else. It might offend some
though like killing babies instead of using birth control? 
All great references to mens right when it comes to abortion.
Where are the drug support references in my post? Or public masturbation?
Women have the right to subject their body to any medical treatment they feel they want or need. Men should not have a say in the matter.
To prevent these situations use condoms. Its that simple kids!
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reply posted on 9-3-2005 @ 11:17 AM by launchpad
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just as i thought i see a lot of folks talking out of both sides of their mouths- and MOSTLY seems to be women.
to paraphrase " if you guys don't want a kid- you are responsible for taking the pre-cautions - else you can be responsible finacially FOR LIFE- but
women always have an out"
i disagree whole heartedly-
it takes two to have sex
it SHOULD take two to take precautions
It SHOULD take two to handle the consequences of it.
right now the women have their cake and can eat it too.
if the guys says up front he didn't want the child- and the women overides him- (oh and BELIEVE ME SHE IS ABLE- even when HE uses condoms) then she
SHOULD BE on her own. That is the ONLY truely fair out come to THAT HALF of the situation.
to reference the very messed up analygy of the "BASEBALL" mentioned earlier by a very missguided FEMALE. sure you can own the ball once it is placed
in your "yard" but when it causes damage to others property YOU are responsible for the finacial damages not the original owner. At least that is
how it should be.
how come if i go donate to a sperm bank am i "reasonably" safe from being forced to pay child support? whereas, if the woman has decietfully poked
holes in condoms or "harvests" the contents of a used one to get pregnant on purpose despite the male being up front on the issue and taking
precautions (happened to me) the man can be hunted down and finacially ruined? still the fathers fault? -- gimme a break! i did not concent to use of
my DNA.
a synical approach might be: "Just gimme my half of every cell and i'm outta here"
Then what of denying the father equal visitation once said child is in the world? in California (and many others) the amount of support a father must
pay is factored baised on how much time each has the child- boy call that fair! if he isn't interested in a relationship with the child or the mother
interferes enough with his visitation, his income is the ONLY determining factor on support amount and it can be as high as 51% BEFORE TAXES!!!! In
some cases this amount is so astronomical that the mother can comfortably afford to quit working/ buy a new car/ and a new house and never has to pay
taxes on the money because the father already has. Often times in this type of case to add insult to injury- mom and child are shacked up or married
to another and the father of the child funds ealier retirement of the whole bunch or greatly suppliments the quality of life- meanwhile the bio-father
is scraping by with little if any recourse and out 51% of his income PLUS the taxes on the whole income.
Women forcing men to have offspring (what else can you call it?), withholding visitation (if he is interested), and demanding support after the fact
are nothing more than parasites. Should a father have rights in reguards to keeping the child? Why is this even a question? YES! MOST DEFINITELY YES!
Else there needs to be a REASONABLE out for the s'perm donor'
someone asked WHY a wife might LIE to her husband and go against his wishes?? get real! you wouldn't ever have been married have you? How about HER
timing and desires don't necessilarly match up with yours or the 'groups/families' consenses and she doesn't want to wait? yeah sure something
THAT big and with such far reaching concequences SHOULD be a unanamous decision but usually it isn't. How about just the factor of another persons
selfishness and willfulness? no man and wife are ONE person- there is another individual there that is going to still have moments (at least) of
wilfulness and selfishness and ignor the "group" desires. But God forbide the man wants a new powertool which has much less impact overall.
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reply posted on 9-3-2005 @ 10:32 PM by csulli456
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Originally posted by LadyV
The problem here is that it is not the man that goes through all the bodily changes, emotional upheavals and birth...not to mention that most men are
not the ones to give up their lives to raise the child.....do not jump me! I am saying most men. I know Kidfinger and I think he would of
taken that child and done fine....he's a good father! But many men are not that way, after the initial excitement of a child is gone....it's the
mother left alone. I don't think things will change on this subject due to the reasons I stated at the beginning.....for the record though, I think
it's unfair and it's not right. The father is just as important to the child as the mother! 
Personally I think it all comes down to responsability. It is quite obvious that it is only natural for a child to come to being with the help of two
adults. Our anatomies are designed for reproduction so that our species may not become extinct. While it is almost completely ridiculous to think that
that is the only reason we will have sex, it is the only reason our bodies our designed this way. Now saying I for one believe we should only have
sex for means of procreation is totally untrue. For many of us it is a constant part of our lives, almost an art in form. But we should not degrade
the fact that we may create a new human in the process. Kids are going through puberty at much earlier stages then ever before because of all the crap
we pump into the animals that we eat. Its in the milk the meat and even most produce is grown unnaturally. So it is almost not the way nature
intended when it comes to kids "doing it". We all know nothing is going to stop them though, we`ve all been there (that is if you aren`t too old).
In cases with children I believe it is up to the parents then to make the correct choice for their child if they are to be a parent at such a young
age. Getting past the issue of kids having babies, I didnt mean to drag on, we as adults need to be responsable. Every time you have sex with someone
you need to know you may share a bond with this person for the rest of your life if a child is the result of your fun. Times have changed and it is
accepted that you dont have to be married to have a child so thats not to worry about, however I think thats what nature intended in some sense
anyway. When a man and a woman come together and produce a child whether they wanted to or not they must take responsability. I think that the man
should take care of this woman at the least throughout the pregnancy. There is a reason why nature intended for two people two make a baby and not
one. A child needs two parents no doubt but if it is accepted by both parents that only one will raise then that is between the two and may infact be
better off for the child in certain circumstances. If the two adults dont want to be together as a couple but choose to have the baby then it is the
man`s responsability to take care of that woman until she delivers their child and is healthy enough to take care of herself and then go back to work
if that is what she does. That is what makes us men and its a shame that so many fathers are not men and just run away like little boys. However if
that man wants to try and work something out in terms of a relationship and living together for better financial purposes and making an attempt at
being a family and on all terms he is not a danger or something like that then the women should not expect money for anything besides the child if she
so chooses she doesnt want to be with him. Dont get me wrong no woman should feel like she has to spend the rest of her life with someone just because
they created a child together but if that so be her choice then she is responsable for paying for all her expenses and no one else. That man also has
an obligation to pay half of everything that that child needs such as clothes, food, diapers, toys ,furniture, daycare, schooling and so on. The
choice of the relationship is between the adults but both need to know they have an obligation to take care of that child. Also the same applies if
the woman does not want to raise that child and the man takes it on then the woman is obligated to pay half of the expenses. On the issue of abortion
it is clear that it must be a unanimous vote if one wants and the other doesnt whoever wants it gets it and gets no help after all is said and done.
it is only fair. I for one do not believe in abortion for one soul reason and I know there are so many who disagree with me but I have to put it out
there. I truly 100% believe that as soon as a child is conceived you have a new human life there. I dont believe it is right to take anyones life
especially that of a defenseless unborn baby. Whether it is 1 minute old or one month or one year it is a life. I believe that even life in its most
earliest stage is life. The only difference is that it is still so undeveloped but it is there and it is beginning. Sorry to stray too far again. The
issue at hand is very complex for me. Under the law abortion is legal so I will address it as so. If a man wants the baby and the woman does not then
he should be required to take care of that woman until his baby is born and then they can part ways. Mabe the woman should even be compensated in some
way for her very hard work through all of this but like I said the man should be taking care of her every need during her pregnancy paying for all her
bills and all of everything. When they part ways that woman then has no obligation to have anything to do with that baby. The same should apply to a
man. Even if he doesnt want the baby he needs to take reponsability for his actions and that means taking care of the woman until she gives birth.
Then he should be able to go on his way. There are plenty of men who arent going to like me saying this but its like I said in the beginning you have
to understand that even if you take every precaution you may still create a baby. It is very hard to not have sex with someone when you both want to
so like nike said "just do it" but keep it real and remember why we were all naturally equipped with the means to have sex. Take responsability for
your actions when it happens. Until then if you dont want a baby make sure you use a condom, birth control and mabe even another condom. Nothing is
100% fullproof so adding together a few things will only help. To sum it all up I would like to add my own experience on this subject. I was 23 when I
found out my girlfriend was pregnant and I was so far from being a responsable adult. Anyway I changed my life dramatically because I knew it was the
right thing to do. I took responsability and I`m not sure how I did that but I am very happy I did. Things will work out if we let them and we need to
be reponsable. I got a better job a place to live and couldnt imagine life without my beautiful daughter by my side every day.
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reply posted on 10-3-2005 @ 07:27 AM by riley
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Originally posted by launchpad
how come if i go donate to a sperm bank am i "reasonably" safe from being forced to pay child support? whereas, if the woman has decietfully poked
holes in condoms or "harvests" the contents of a used one to get pregnant on purpose despite the male being up front on the issue and taking
precautions (happened to me) the man can be hunted down and finacially ruined? still the fathers fault? -- gimme a break! i did not concent to use of
my DNA. 
Unless she actually dug through a rubbish bin to find a used condom just to self impregenate.. [and that does happen- i agree the guy shouldn't have
to pay if he hasn't had sex with her and she's stolen sperm] what you are saying is a bit baseless.. how are you sure the woman poked holes
in it? Condoms can tear all by themselves.
Why should a man be mortiphied when a woman becomes pregnant to him through sex? Sex causes pregnancy.. this is not a recent phenomenon and as said
before contraception offers no guarentees.
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