Regents park police post twitter pic of dangerous spoon they got off the street

this thread would be a lot better if I could get the pic upload feature on ats to work, but I cant.

So I will just link to the twitter feed and people can see.

there has been a lot of talk about the UK going after knives.

Some people like myself have thought this is ridiculous, but I was told that only very dangerous knives would be confiscated.

And so I was shocked, shocked I tell you!, to find a police force in the UK showing a pci of all of the dangerous weapons they got off the street yesterday.
twitter.com...

Yesterday we conducted weapons sweeps,dealt with a person injured from a van reversing on them, reported a burglary and collected all these from @scope charity shop who diligently didn’t want them to get into the wrong hands & disposed of correctly & safely

What are some of these dangerous weapons?

Regular kitchen knives, a knife sharpener, barbecue forks, and..... an old rusty spoon.

yep, third from the right is a rusty everyday dinner spoon.

Now this obviously is a staged publicity photo. SO either this police really did feel this was a weapon they got off the street, or they are the best trolls online.

either way, its laughable to see how far the UK system of confiscating weapons (or in this case people turning in "dangerous" weapons voluntarily) has gone.

A spoon.....

I'm guessing it was some rouge UK fan of styx taking his spoon clanking to the next level. Obviously I'm referring to a spoon shanking.

Damn alt righters.

I'm guessing sporks are next.

The dreaded "switch-spork" has been destroying buffet restaurants for years... silent, concealable and so ridiculous, that "sporking" victims almost never report their attacks.

I have heard that "assault sporks" are being developed. Ten tiny tines, instead of four or five.

3D printer ready plans for "assault sporks", have been circulating on social media.

One particularly sinister design, incorporates a drinking straw with a spork-bayonet attached... it's reportedly popular with middle-class Californians...

As for the UK, I think everyone should be locked into a room until a government official comes and escorts them to a pre-approved destination(work or groceries). Outside of that, like dating, I think the government should obviously oversee any social interactions that the "citizens" wish to partake in.

Also, outside of the usual daily oversight(movement, speech, etc) I think all citizens should be subjected to an annual mental as examination as well.

Also any sort of job placement should be overseen by the state. Put people into the positions they are best suited for and not what they "feel" they should be doing.

Remember that this started with gun control.

Now they are literally talking about putting GPS trackers in all knives.



Imagine Braveheart if the English had also confiscated the rocks the Scots trained with.

Did I say Imagine?

I meant wait until...

originally posted by: madmac5150
I'm guessing sporks are next.

The dreaded "switch-spork" has been destroying buffet restaurants for years... silent, concealable and so ridiculous, that "sporking" victims almost never report their attacks.

Keys are very pointy as well. The UK has a lot of cars, cars require keys, by extension all those drivers are infact harboring a makeshift shiv in their pockets.

You should have to put your keys in a keybox and request access from an official government official. After having stated your intended destination and purpose of course.

Jokes aside, you brits are a bunch of cucks. Have fun in your dystopia.

originally posted by: abe froman
Remember that this started with gun control.

Now they are literally talking about putting GPS trackers in all knives.



Imagine Braveheart if the English had also confiscated the rocks the Scots trained with.

Did I say Imagine?

I meant wait until...

I wonder "who" they'll choose when they regress back and grant the rights of prima nocta to for the UK ladies.

Hmmm. Who could that possibly be.

Imagine if those UK dandies ever set foot in a KFC

a reply to: MisterSpock

"It's good to be the king."

a reply to: Grambler

What about "Assault Sticks"?

They can be rather pointy.

And splinters.

Damned Trump!

I know it isn't "fair" but it's crap like this that makes me increasing invalidate the opinion of any brit when it comes to commenting on actual western freedoms.

Because the UK is no longer included in the definition of western freedoms.

It's literally probably the most dystopian first world/western country. The only reason we are mocking you is out of concern/helpfulness. It's not too late(pretty close), pull your heads out of your butts and reign this garbage in.

Dear god, what if people start using harsh language?

(curls into foetal* position and cries.)






*I said "foetal" because Brits would understand the language

I look forward to some commentary on this from our UK friends.

It's understandable that it's taking a little while for the responses. Seeing as though all their social media commentary has to be filtered through the government for hate speech.

I'm sure the boys at the government are working overtime and will soon "approve" some of their citizens comments.

Honk! Honk! Clown world! The UK is so screwed it aint even funny anymore.

a reply to: MisterSpock

They have to finish their "Jellied Eels" and tea and crumpets first.

Then they will reply with something dry and very educated because they all went to Eton and wore ties to school.

"Brazil"...Gilliam nailed it years ago.

originally posted by: quercusrex
"Brazil"...Gilliam nailed it years ago.

*Hangs head in shame*

Still haven't seen that movie, have had it for years.

But these days it's understandable. Watching stuff like that from decades ago isn't about envisioning the future, but living the present. It just pisses me off more.

Gilliam is great though, so it's worth watching it for that.

looks like someone cooked some heroin in that spoon.
just looking at the coloration.

originally posted by: abe froman
Remember that this started with gun control.

Now they are literally talking about putting GPS trackers in all knives.



Imagine Braveheart if the English had also confiscated the rocks the Scots trained with.

Did I say Imagine?

I meant wait until...

Not an issue, judging by most of the "scots" here. They are all in on the UK dystopian nonsense that their ancestors would be ashamed that they embraced.

I guess it's okay though, since they don't see it.

Don't underestimate the lethal power of a spoon in the right hands.

Have you not seen the wobbly spoon bending trick? They're obviously demonic in nature.