I just smashed my head into a mirror

originally posted by: pthena
a reply to: Firebrand1105volunteer

Does anyone around here know how to get Heath ledgers joker in my avatar?

Yes. DontTreadOnMe does. Avatar Creations 2018 - 2019

When you find yourself locked on to an unpleasant train of thought, remember this... there's always madness !



~

Remember,

When you let the cat out of the bag.

The turtle must shave his mustache.

a reply to: Firebrand1105volunteer

Please hush it jaden, not again with your dumb stuff.. *rolls eyes*

originally posted by: whyamIhere
Remember,

When you let the cat out of the bag.

The turtle must shave his mustache.

You ever tell a mate to close the window, when you're walking down the street.. Or say, Just gotta brush my feet, when being hassled to hurry up.

Or is it just me..

I have absolutely zero idea what this thread is about!

Jaden? Is that you?

originally posted by: chr0naut
a reply to: Firebrand1105volunteer
There seemed to be a lot of separate intertwined topics in your OP.
Would you perhaps like to disentangle it for me, please?

Yeah, looks like different persons ranting at the same time. 2 or 3 at least.

a reply to: Firebrand1105volunteer

Please quit smashing your head against things. You're gonna really hurt yourself....

Then you'll call 911- Emergency, I'll have to come bandage you and transport your butt to treatment.

If you are feeling, acting, or think you're losing it? Then remember you're not alone!

Say NO to mirrors!!!!

EMT/ERT, Advanced Life Support

a reply to: gallop

When you find yourself locked on to an unpleasant train of thought, remember this... there's always madness !

When confused by seemingly random ideas
don't get swept away by the swirling
vortex or lost in the maelstrom of incoherence
but rather seek the bottom line.

Disdain the maths
go with the visual technicals
the top line caret down
settings cog in drop down row
copy paste direct url in avatar box

but don't forget to right-clic
copy link the image of your desire
else go back and start again.

a reply to: Firebrand1105volunteer

Seek help. Sure sounds like you need it.

So I been doing this investigation . My own murder. I was at friends house we were looking at Playboys Jenny McCarthy. I didn't know about female anatomy or what sex was. I was 13. Moved around a lot quiet talk when spoken to keep my head down draw all the time, quiet. So my best friend...whips it out and demonstrates solo. We spoke marijuana and I talk about a crush on this girl six years, I would go to a field and kiss little kid stuff. The guy who brought pot also like girl and ran and told friends. That was gayest I had ever seen.

So I am walking home the day before I got on a train and jumped off as a shortcut . I call my uncle from Blockbuster video which was right by train station. He was drinking couldn't pick me up. So I walk on tracks, the day before the train was going really fast and scared me. So five guys run up behind me.

I woke up in a hospital 3 weeks later. Couldn't talk told i fell off a train. Wasn't able to speak would open mouth and nothing came out. Was in wheelchair right side of body was paralyzed couldn't walk. Had to learn to walk again. The medical records were changed and everyone told me I fell off a train. I still have no memory of the day and woke up with amnesia.

11 years later I go to a conspiracy site to talk about MTV and graduation . Everybody tells me nothing happened. I wake up one day with a big purple stain on my arm. Dad says I look like Michael Meyers I just got up. I call an ambulance after 5 days. I am taken to Cpep they send you to any hospital on island that has bed. Four people are in there I recognize from school. One says we killed you p***y. I had 24/7 schizophrenia for over a year so I was a little out of it. I put pieces together. Secret murder plot.

So the day I forgot that made me a school shooter or I thought till 2 weeks ago I found out it didn't happen. 5 people run up behind me, I get castrated after 2 people's on my face. Get scar on inside of right wrist. And go into seizures because of massive head injury. For some reason I work or undercover as a spy for the gove4nment. The illuminati freemasons and NWO. So does anyone think this was black ops , the freemasons symbol is a compass and t square with G in middle. 7th letter.

the social media is over. i had a stalker who was interrogating me. just keep it up and empty. i was kinda sarcastic about sounding crazy. i am or was communicating with the masses or certain people. so the government probaly didnt plan a bunch of 13 year olds to attack me. then Y2K and columbine because of gangsta rap heathers movie or doom. so we go into black 7 simply because the empire was there. so my tv talks to me on july 14th 2002 and i visit 3 psych wards for a total of 3 months the last one taken to court for refusing meds. they made me sick i dont need them.

so i got a court order for treatment monthly injections and made 5 days a week go to program smoke cigarettes watch pool draw pictures and do tai chi. i hated it it took me five years to finish high school because of attendence problems and i dont give a *. i talked to myself cause i was convinced i had surveillance on me and the tv was real. i made a plan to write a book because something was going on. mtv treated me like surviving school shooter and i got very paranoid of town.

my dad s boss was a millionaire and left him everything in his will. so we had money a little while cause he was probating will. till they threw it out and put my dad in jail. i met these 2 girls and we used to go to trips to city, florida, rhode island out east and it was cool. my court order they just kept continueing it so my dad and me told the mental illness people i was moving to florida. we stayed at hotel then came back. i stayed undercover till court order expired on january 1st 2005 . on that day i went online now someone can tell me truth of what happened.

i started college and got kicked out for talking to myself too much acting wacky. also i think my dad took me to a hotel outta state room 222 . i got caught trying to overdose on pills i took half a bottle of tylenol and got sick and couldnt finish it. i felt bad because my alter ego the shock jock in my room who would talk to himself. i would ruin holidays for the police or whoever was listening to my room. i was nieve cause of injury a tsunami happened on 12/24/2004 and i felt bad for being idoit.

so after i got kicked outta college i got put back in psych. i broke tv with hammer saying i hate you. got a new tv and used it just for games. i used to grow things in closet since high school. finally got mason jars which were airtight. yada , yada , yada soon i had a lot of hallucinagenic mushrooms. overdosed after using six weeks every other day. six months later i started hearing voices24/7 but i thought it was a conspiracy. my neighbors using sound radar guns to talk in quiet voice under sound. for five years i was in breakfast club and i was being covertly run outta town. may 5 2008 i went online about mtv cause voices told me to wait three weeks. so 3 1/2 & 3 1/2. then i found out about secret murder plot.

Aaaaahhhhh. Aaaaahhhhh. My dad got outta jail in November 07 pretty soon I started working with him. Voices started 4/4 or 6/2007 and it was all day every day. You get used to it so worked with dad and start going to strip clubs a lot. We were making good money.

So for 5 years go to work go to program and neighbors would follow me to every location with sound equipment at my roast trying to be persecutory make fun and remove me from town. I don't remember the day to day dialogue but for awhile had to go to silent hill and meet demons. It was just like the game all my peers dead wife.

In 3/2012 I got meds herbal incense got banned new about 15 months and my mom was diagnosed with stage four cancer. She made it about seven months .

I am impulsive and have short term memory problems cause of accident. I used to fight injustice and just believed I had freedom of speech. I was a burden on some people. A sort of kind of crazy. This is rant so that is what I am doing.

My adventures, well I had to sell my mom's house with my sister. The voices came back cause this doctor in Brentwood heard of Facebook and wouldn't give me enough meds. After I was in dangerous people psych for bringing knife into town at 3 am. Couldn't take voices held up hands tried to arrest self so I could leave house. I don't know might have been before that. Found out not normal schizophrenia it was NASA and ghost in the shell cyborg stuff. One night in year six they leveled with me Obama was in charge and maybe got pardon.

I thought I gave self schizophrenia and just the lengths people go to for a front.

The girl is nice she kept looking out for me and communication and I stayed on the phone too long. I don't know if everybody thinks mentally ill from amityville rape and murder your family too? I got my arms big that's for defense cause MTV signed me up for fight club. She is nice probably will never see again. She had a job left, she gets job back and I bump into her I am not going to be crazy person and talk about Above Top Secret.

a reply to: Firebrand1105volunteer

... Couldn't take voices held up hands tried to arrest self so I could leave house. ...

That must have been something to see!

originally posted by: Firebrand1105volunteer
I F ed up. A few days speaking crazy on my social media. One friend I knew from program probably believes mentally ill. Talking in maths about personal stuff, maybe no one knows what I was talking about. Run away. I am probably never going to see any of those people again exce best friend and cousin. Facebook doesn't rule the world.

There was a time I got gang trolled by community. Word of mouth spread and every time I go to far west trolled by people. At mall the other day at cafe and these people I didn't know them. Just in their conversation said "shouldn't talk about CIA stuff". Infamous like OJ.

That is all behind me know for whatever reason possessed to go on Facebook . Sometimes second guess my choices. Because of slight of hand. Anyway I was having mental problems and smashed my head into a mirror metaphorically. It's all over go undercover. Sometimes look how many people are on this site see 191. The shadows the thread about five years ago, wink wink nudge nudge.

There is no longer any chance to speak up or revolt, just go with the flow. Does anyone around here know how to get Heath ledgers joker in my avatar?

1 x 3 = 11.420986543 squared divided by Pi. to the power of infinity and beyond

had to speak in math so the OP might understand the personal stuff.

anyhoo,

next Friday beside the bush behind that bin, you know.

a reply to: Firebrand1105volunteer

I had 24/7 schizophrenia for over a year so I was a little out of it.

had?

No offense man, but you sound like you are posting a great description of a dream, it makes no sense like many dreams do when you try and understand or describe them.

I can never seem to explain dreams that aren't vivid dreams because they are so strange and things change or morph would be a better word from one to another.

Reading your posts reminds me of explainable indescribable dreams because they are sooo all over the place and make very little to absolutely no sense what so ever.

These last 3 or 4 posts in my opinion are scary, nightmare.

I hope things get better for you, the internet, most media like TV and other forms information you should stay away from and try getting healthy, you say you worked on your arms and they are big so hopeful you can work on your mind and clear up what ever mess is up there.

all the best

i am already a lot better than i sound . i used to run a conspiracy show from facebook. i didnt have any other means to broadcast my pirate signal. like a poor mans alex jones or bill cooper. my writings all make perfect sense to me i lived them, i know they seem a little disjointed.


i was in high school upon turning 18 and fifth year i stayed for second year of tech cause of attendence issues. a few weeks into summer and my television contacts me. in the real world i got a psych history of 20 hospital visits. in my double life i run a truman show from house and tv personalities wink at me product placement from show shows up in music movies and video games. tesla free energy with imagination religion the apocolapse armageddon games like silent hill.

i gotta go can answer any questions.

I don't mean to sound disgusting but scarlet woman atop ten headed beast. What if beast 2000 years ago meant sorta wild animal or onestep forward two back? I would read through the prophecy when I found out and look for signs or try to fit things.

The tsunami on Christmas Eve 2004 earthquakes and in the remake of the movie the omen they talked about the war in Iraq as a sign. I think the towers falling or something with fire. I haven't read Revelation in a while.

Somebody once told me
The world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kinda dumb
With her finger and her thumb
In shape of an "L" on her forehead

Well the years start coming
And they don't stop coming
Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense
Not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb
So much to do
So much to see

So what's wrong with taking the back street
You'll never know if you don't go

You'll never shine if you don't glow
Hey now
You're an all star
Get your game on
Go play