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Birds

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posted on Mar, 17 2019 @ 12:57 PM
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I had just woken up for the day, fixed my lightly spiked grapefruit juice breakfast (Doctor's orders), and was sitting at the command center in front of the big screen at the controls when all I hear is..

..a female bird doing a mating call maybe ten feet away from the window in an otherwise silent room. It's particularly sunny and lukewarm outside today as it's been more often since time was set forward an hour. And man, she must want it bad because she was persistent. I know it was a female and not a male from the sound and pitch of it, then the reply it'd get from another bird within some distance of proximity.

She didn't like him apparently, maybe his mating call game is weak because he's young or less fit and it wasn't loud enough and/or the right pitch for her approval. So she kept doing it in intervals.. over, and over, and over again. As I was forced to tune in, I have a bad habit of timing from music and cooking so my brain started counting seconds inbetween calls.

Finally. after 10 minutes, one/both of them gave up or perhaps she said screw it, this is the best I'm going to get and the hormones in her literal pea sized brain of intricate evolution from millions of years of selective breeding flooded her biological circuitry, but it stopped and peace reigned..

..except now I hear residual chirps that aren't actually real in my brain like listening to a song too many times.
edit on Sun Mar 17 2019 by DontTreadOnMe because: removed emoticon from title




posted on Mar, 17 2019 @ 01:45 PM
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a reply to: r0xor

Your experience is much better than my recent experience with hundreds, perhaps thousands, of birds swarming the massive holley tree in my front yard.

A week ago, the tree was loaded with berries in a vain attempt to procreate, when the swarm attacked it with truly inhumane violence. Protected by my double hung picture window, which at times I was concerned about, I stood there mesmerized by the sight. Birds chaotically flying one way, then another. Some landing, some swooping, some just flying by. None were at peace. All were voraciously chomping the once beautiful red berries the tree had to offer.

As I stood there, one bird flew directly into the window not at all caring that I was standing there, knocking itself senseless, and then flying off. Then another, then another, then ten others, and so on.... This went on for hours. All in all, I estimate that between 100 - 200 birds had their noggins at least dented a little, further diminishing their pea sized brains.

Then, as one, they all fly away presumably on to attack other targets in their path south. All I'm left with is a beautiful tree stripped of it berries with no hope of procreation, ten million prickly holley leaves on the ground to tip toe around, feathers piled up on the window sill like tiny snow drifts, and smudges all over the window waiting for me to clean it.

Spring, how wondrous!



posted on Mar, 17 2019 @ 02:02 PM
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a reply to: r0xor
It could be worse. It could be a swarm of birds that want to peck your eyes out.




posted on Mar, 17 2019 @ 03:18 PM
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a reply to: r0xor

Most birds are stupid. Pretty, but stupid.

My friend has a beautiful white cockatiel that rings a bell and chirps all the time, wanting some stale bread, so when I go to feed it.... honestly continents drift faster than this birds cognitive functionality.

And don't get me started on the rainbow lorikeets, you feed one and suddenly it invites it's brothers, sisters, cousins, second cousins, some birds it was partying with, then listening to the football is drowned out by never-ending squawking.

I like my feathered friends but sometimes I wish I had an air horn, the little buggers always chirp up when the score is level at the death.



posted on Mar, 17 2019 @ 03:22 PM
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You think that's bad? Every year, spring through autumn, about an hour and a half to 2 hours before sunrise, a goddamn robin sits atop my chimney, which runs right next to our bedroom windows on the second floor, and sings his fool head off. Unless it's a heavy rain or thunderstorm, in which case, the windows are closed anyway. But most of the time, it's every morning.

Every.

SINGLE.

MORNING.

We have no A/C system or even window units, so open windows in the warm seasons is critical for keeping the home at a pleasant temperature. Shutting the windows jacks up the temp upstairs quickly.
So come summer, that feathered bastard sits up there, and sings and sings and sings. Starting around 4:30 in the goddamn morning for several hours on our longest northern days.

AND, AND! Sometimes the SOB brings guests and they have a party up there. Nothing more aggravating in the middle of the night/wee hours of the AM than a crooner who doesn't know when to quit, or his entourage. It's even worse if other birds in the trees/elsewhere in the neighborhood chime in. That's a cacophony nobody's ears want at that hour.



posted on Mar, 17 2019 @ 05:05 PM
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I'm loving the posts in here! OMG, so funny!




posted on Mar, 17 2019 @ 05:15 PM
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a reply to: r0xor
I flagged you for your story however I just cannot get on board with the "wing of hate"!!!



Me and my Shasta are outta here!




posted on Mar, 17 2019 @ 05:29 PM
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So, Roxor, are you saying that today's event turned you into a bird brain?







 
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