For the best night sleep in the whole wide world. . . .

I just count goats. Not sheep, but goats! Stinky, ornery, goats; the more ornery the better.

Counting cows is too stressful, and the coyotes never get the goats, but they clean up on sheep. I can go to sleep at night knowing every single one of those goats will show up tomorrow, and twice on Sunday! Nobody ever keeps an escaped goat; they'll act like they didn't know a damn thing when one of your steer calves show up in their pasture, but they'll drive 300 miles at 92mph to return a nasty old billy goat!

"That your goat with the chewed up bell 'round his neck, one stupid lookin broke horn on his noggin and smells like he just went for a dip in the trailer park sewage pond??? Yeah?? Ate my entire gawd-damned flower bed, he did, and then tried to breed with my wife's prize Shihtzu! You say his name is, Clyde, is it? Well, I'll have 'Clyde' back at your place inside 30 minutes...maybe 20!!!"

Yeah, I just count goats!

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...**chuckle**, **snort**, **giggle**...ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!

So now that they are all good and sweaty in the 185,000 degrees and smell like DB, are they still working?

Well, thank you very much. That's the best kind of endorsement!
a reply to: DBCowboy

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

I had already posted something like this earlier and forgot
about it.