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I'm a Florida 'Skunk Ape' :D

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posted on Dec, 26 2018 @ 09:19 AM
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I have an humorous anecdote for you. Two weeks ago, I was pedaling a bicycle & trailer rig across highway 60 here in South Florida. I am 55 years old and ride like this a LOT for adventures. I don't like to spend a lot of $ and the fact I was raised in Florida wilderness makes it easy. I set up a 'stealth camp' along the roadway, just out of sight of passing traffic. Across the street was a minmart type place in the middle of nowhere - I am sure it would close pretty early as most do. It was about 9pm I walked over there and bought myself a big bottle of V8 and then returned to my camp spot. About a half hour after getting comfortable, I hear foot steps crashing through the brush and see a flashlight. It was a Polk County Deputy and of course I was rousted and checked out as would be expected (so much for stealth lol). I asked the deputy how he spotted me. He said some lady driving by, saw a 'skunk ape' walk across the roadway. She called 911 and parked and waited at the little store to point the way to the deputy, that she saw it cross lol! I'm dying over here by now haha. It was cold to my bones, I know it doesn't get real cold here but to my old bones after riding all night I was freezing. Anyway, she tells the deputy that 'it' walked across the road in THREE STEPS
. By now of course, the Deputy and I know it was ME she misidentified after I assured him NOTHING was in, nor came into the woods lol. I am 6'2" tall, I was wearing an M65 Army field jacket, a 'boonie hat' and black 'tactical trousers' and brown hiking boots. I should mention that I have very, very long black hair still a top my head and a full beard, but it is white haha. I didn't use a flash light while crossing the road, because I could see very well from the lights at the store. This lady swore to the deputy that the creature was at least 8' tall, all black in color and moving very fast across the road. I will concede that I was moving very quickly because I was cold and miserable in the wind. The deputy was cool and told me to go back to sleep and watch for snakes and left. So either, I spent the night with an 8' cryptid primate within feet of me, or this lady misidentified me as such - you decide




posted on Dec, 26 2018 @ 09:30 AM
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a reply to: vance

Obvious disinfo to throw us off your trail.

We're on to your little ruse.



posted on Dec, 26 2018 @ 09:33 AM
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a reply to: watchitburn

Haha, ugly does not a 'skunk ape' make. My foot is only 13.5" long. I am innocent!



posted on Dec, 26 2018 @ 09:34 AM
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originally posted by: vance
a reply to: watchitburn

Haha, ugly does not a 'skunk ape' make. My foot is only 13.5" long. I am innocent!


Phht, that's just what a skunkape would say!



posted on Dec, 26 2018 @ 09:47 AM
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a reply to: vance
Do you stink? Skunk apes are notoriously smelly. Or are you a shapeshifter?



posted on Dec, 26 2018 @ 09:52 AM
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Obvious this is a cover story for ManBearPig.

You're not fooling anyone



posted on Dec, 26 2018 @ 09:58 AM
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originally posted by: vance
I have an humorous anecdote for you. Two weeks ago, I was pedaling a bicycle & trailer rig across highway 60 here in South Florida. I am 55 years old and ride like this a LOT for adventures. I don't like to spend a lot of $ and the fact I was raised in Florida wilderness makes it easy. I set up a 'stealth camp' along the roadway, just out of sight of passing traffic. Across the street was a minmart type place in the middle of nowhere - I am sure it would close pretty early as most do. It was about 9pm I walked over there and bought myself a big bottle of V8 and then returned to my camp spot. About a half hour after getting comfortable, I hear foot steps crashing through the brush and see a flashlight. It was a Polk County Deputy and of course I was rousted and checked out as would be expected (so much for stealth lol). I asked the deputy how he spotted me. He said some lady driving by, saw a 'skunk ape' walk across the roadway. She called 911 and parked and waited at the little store to point the way to the deputy, that she saw it cross lol! I'm dying over here by now haha. It was cold to my bones, I know it doesn't get real cold here but to my old bones after riding all night I was freezing. Anyway, she tells the deputy that 'it' walked across the road in THREE STEPS
. By now of course, the Deputy and I know it was ME she misidentified after I assured him NOTHING was in, nor came into the woods lol. I am 6'2" tall, I was wearing an M65 Army field jacket, a 'boonie hat' and black 'tactical trousers' and brown hiking boots. I should mention that I have very, very long black hair still a top my head and a full beard, but it is white haha. I didn't use a flash light while crossing the road, because I could see very well from the lights at the store. This lady swore to the deputy that the creature was at least 8' tall, all black in color and moving very fast across the road. I will concede that I was moving very quickly because I was cold and miserable in the wind. The deputy was cool and told me to go back to sleep and watch for snakes and left. So either, I spent the night with an 8' cryptid primate within feet of me, or this lady misidentified me as such - you decide


Funny, just hope she didn't say she smelled the skunk ape as well...



posted on Dec, 26 2018 @ 10:12 AM
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Well if I stink, she didn't come close enough to find out lol. It is just that misidentification became a very real phenomenon for me that night. I find this fascinating that something like that might be out there. I always believed people have to be seeing something. I was born here in 1963 and I would say I have spent two thirds of my life deep in the Florida wilderness all over the State. I have seen everything, but no sign of anything like they claim to see. I grew up hearing them called 'boogers' so I suspect something is behind all those sightings - hell I was behind at least one



posted on Dec, 26 2018 @ 12:20 PM
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You are not fooling anyone. In fact, you were migrating South from Kentucky in October, you big, smelly, cryptid!

www.abovetopsecret.com...



posted on Dec, 26 2018 @ 08:47 PM
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originally posted by: usernameconspiracy
You are not fooling anyone. In fact, you were migrating South from Kentucky in October, you big, smelly, cryptid!

www.abovetopsecret.com...


lol that was great, thanks



posted on Dec, 27 2018 @ 05:56 AM
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Thanks for sharing that great story and very cool that you can just set up Camp like that in Florida



posted on Dec, 27 2018 @ 05:59 AM
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I'm just surprised that a 911 operator would take a call like that seriously and send an officer out. Now say this was a real skunk ape what was this officer supposed to do, shoOT it? It would have been long gone by the time he showed up and with your boots on you were probably like 6'4"



posted on Jan, 10 2019 @ 01:23 PM
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Vance, you wouldn't happen to have been in Kentucky a little before Christmas this last year?



posted on Jan, 14 2019 @ 07:56 PM
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Interesting




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