posted on Dec, 13 2018 @ 07:56 AM
a reply to: Jess_Undefined
My mom has never really been honest about my dad. I know this because of what my Aunt has told us.
My mom didn't know she was having twins, back in the 70's sonograms aren't how they are now. The one sonogram had our heartbeats in sync. My Aunt and
my mom's mother told my sister and I the baby was suppose to be adopted but when it became twins my dad refused the adoption. My mom to this day
deny's it even though her own sister and mother told us and why would they lie? My dad use to call when we were kids and I remember my mom not letting
us speak to him when she did take the collect calls. I remember when we graduated he called and again she wouldn't let us speak to him. I know why she
left him but at some point we had a right to speak to him. We had no information on him so when we graduated my sister and I went online, that's when
the internet started to get going. Sites like Ancestry. com were just starting out but without any real names or information we couldn't find
anything. So around 2002 I believe my sister found his sister in Arizona, can't remember how she did. So we all called him and spoke to him. He said
after my mom left he never drank again and had been sober ever since. I also know around this time he had just had open heart surgery, he would have
been in his 40's. I have told my mom over the years how I didn't like how she kept him from us and that after a certain point it was our choice to
talk to him when he called. She never says anything. My mom knows about what is going on and said he wasn't a bad guy just a bad drunk and abusive
when he drank and he was but those are things i don't remember at all. I only know most of this because family has told us what use to happen and why
my mom left. I don't blame her for leaving but at some point especially in HS she should have let us speak to him. We found all this out when we
talked to him in 2002. We spoke for maybe 6 months then lost touch, his number was inactive. I kept the same number for quite some time in case he
called and he never did. I had many people look for him again after that to no avail, even some ATS members with connections tried and nothing. Funny
thing is I DID find him I believe now in about 2012 in NC and some guy named Richard. I called the number but he said he didn't know anyone by that
name. I wonder now if this person did know him and just said that because my dad's mom lived in NC. I guess I will never know until I speak to him. I
just want to know why after 2002 he never stayed in contact and WHY he was soooo below the radar that I couldn't find jack on him even with his social
The times we did speak back in 2002 it was like no time had passed. We got along great on the phone. I learned where MANY of my mannerisms come from.
My sister and I both look exactly like our dad as well. Many of our interests come from him. I remember he shared his special cheesecake recipe with
me too! My mom was surprised because he would never give it up before. So I get cooking from both parents lol I guess it was inevitable I would love
I hope to see or talk to him soon. I really want to go visit if he really is sick to the point he will pass soon. I want to take Liam with me,
something I am sure my mom won't agree with but I"m 40 years old and i want to see my dad and have him meet his grandson.
As for your relative. I hope you find them too! Have you tried online? I have ancestry.com if you want to give me names and maybe I can see if I can
find something. I signed up for a free trial for right now. It's CHANGED alot since I was last a member and now I have more information than ever
I found out one of my second or third uncle's started a COFFEE company in DENMARK! HAHA it's still there and extremely popular. I have coffee with my
name on it! That is the coolest thing ever! I will have to order it and send it to my bf since they don't ship to the states and he can send it to me!