addiction

Add to this with your stories or poems on how it effected your life.

I lay ripped and torn,
laying on death's lawn,
i wear my crown of thorns,
which i worn for many years,
its me that bled my tears
and increased my fears.

i drink myself to death,
if only i knew what was best,
i would of stopped to rest,
but i couldnt care less,
for you or anyone,
this is what i done,
i deserve what is to come,
if i could go back in time,
i might just change my mind.

(authors notes)

Yeah, there is a very personal poem about a dark period in my life. Thank God i have overcome it. Decided to bump this up to help any member of ATS who might have problems, etc, its easy to overcome it when you put your mind to it

I lay ripped and torn,
laying on death's lawn,
i wear my crown of thorns,
which i worn for many years,
its me that bled my tears
and increased my fears.

i didn't drink myself to death,
I knew there was something that was best,
i wished I could have rest,
but i couldnt care less,
for you or anyone,
this is what i done,
i deserve what is to come,
if i could go back in time,
i might just change my mind,
play the same instruments alike
but with different notes, a sight
with smarter eyes, faster thought
and find myself unbought...


I almost wilfully killed myself with a motorbike, once. Then a part of me submitted to this world - I feel your words, yet twisted them to my experience.

Deep stuff, my friend - hope you have good days

Self loathing - a hideous practice.
Renting space to a beast,
a tenant who does not pay
and will not leave.

Awakening often to the sound
of your own space
being burglarized,
you sigh and return to sleep.

Continue, defiler,
fear the loss of your ritual comfort -
desperate and afraid,
your world grows small.

[edit on 6/4/2005 by Zipdot]

Days gone by, days wasted, today is another
Once again I'll chalk it up as the cost
The cost of doing business with each other
You my old friend, have cost me lots
My money, my time, my youth even helping
Helping find a way to jailhouse cots

Sometimes you help me forget things
Other times you simply remind me
Help me forget I wear a wedding ring
Remind me I've never been worthy
Help me forget about the consequences
Remind me about the mistakes, bad choices

My old friend, why can't I leave you
Why do I curse you then spend my day
Spend my day looking for you, needing you
I don't want to be with you anymore
I try, but I can't just simply slip away
Somehow you'll be there knocking on my door

It's been years since I've been alone
Me with you, you in that bottle there
Me with you is all my family has known
Me with you, you don't seem to care
Me with you is the only thing I've known
Dear old friend, without you I couldn't bear

I'm tired and I wonder friend so dear
Would I miss you, and you miss me
If I could quit you, get my head clear
Would you let me go, let me be free
I've tried to let go, but you welcome
Welcome me back whenever I fall
Walk with me home from last call

I don't know how to stay clean
And as long I have you I won't
I can get drunk, get mean
I can get sober, but I don't
Till death or a sentence in jail
I'll have you in a bottle sweet ale

Morning flows to Night.
Hours pass, then days, then weeks.
And here I am, still.

So much violence,
So many thefts and killings,
Rest on my conscience

Yet I cannot stop;
GTA San Andreas
Consumes all my time...

Now this isnt about me, but someone close that I knew,

As the gleeming metal of the knife digs ever deeper into my arm, I grit my teeth and a small tear rolls down my cheek. I want to stop, yet cant. I am so depressed with everything- life,school,friends. Why is it so hard to take my own miserable existance? As the knife pierces through the first layer of my vein, I can feel the emotion I have longed for so many years. Happiness. It is over so very quickly, yet, I will never forget that feeling, my very last feeling.