New dad question

a reply to: and14263

Doesn't it seem like nature does everything in its power to make us promiscuous!

I think like has been said already, the terminology of ppd being a kind of depression is wildly inaccurate. Yes, it can manifest as depression or lack of feeling for the baby etc. (probably many don't even know this much) but the potential for extreme mental episodes is there and needs to be looked out for.

I'm already on the lookout during this pregnancy. She carries very well, but bless her she is very sensitive to the hormonal side of things and it can be very tough.

a reply to: Dem0nc1eaner

We were offered help as soon as we told the doctor about the second pregnancy.

Mild medication and a 'plan' in case there were any signs. If you have any worries at all ask your GP about this, it kind of makes things eaier - but of course, you and your mrs are the ones who know whether this is required!


Of course, as males we are programmed to hit and run, relationships are not in our innate make-up. However, women being the stronger sex have manipulated us into believing the opposite.

And people say women are the weaker sex.. They are by far the cleverest and strongest.

a reply to: and14263

Each sex has its innate strengths.

originally posted by: ketsuko
a reply to: putnam6

Oh lord, yes, COLIC!

Ours went through that colic phase. Like clockwork every night at the same time. We ended up with one of us with the kid on our lap and the other one running back and forth to the microwave with a slightly damp tea towel warming it. The only thing that would soothe was to take the warm towel and put it over his tummy and rub in a circular motion.

Since we didn't have a heating pad, and we didn't know how long the colic would last ... back and forth to the microwave with slightly damp towels while the other massaged.

I managed to burn a hole in one of them.

Its terrible drove my wife to tears, we were young when we had our first and the first few times, even the doctor was like we were over reacting at first till she had an episode in his office. Thats when we started trying all different formulas etc. holding her different ways, we use warm towels from the dryer Those first few months it was a battle to get her fed burped and get through the colic episodes. We would go through an episodes rocking her in the recliner and just fall asleep there with her. It was amazing our second would take a bottle and burp normally and go to sleep, spent the first 6 months always checking on her LOL cause we were used to a non crying baby.

a reply to: ketsuko

Oh, yes I agree.

I am under no illusion though that men are the stronger sex... This propaganda has been fed to society for years.

Women = most powerful sex.

a reply to: putnam6

Ours had colic too, I honestly nearly lost my mind after 2 and a half months of doing all night feeds and him screaming for hours on end in between.

Thank goodness he slept through the night from 10 weeks and never looked back. We cured his colic using that horrible looking thick comfort milk, it worked basically straight away.

a reply to: Dem0nc1eaner

first..congrats on the new baby!!! also we are not trying to scare you but good idea to look up post par tum and and post par tum psychosis...just so you know what to look for..just in case...sometimes medical insurance there is a number where you can talk to a nurse.

please come back and update us......yes your wife needs to get enough sleep and the follow up appointment

a reply to: Dem0nc1eaner

Yea its pretty stressful. Seriously nobody believed us thought we were overreacting. My parents her parents our brothers and sisters. One Sunday we all went to our grandmothers and our baby had an episode and my grandmother was like thats not normal. We took her back in to pediatrician the next day after a late afternoon feeding, and she started wailing having an episode and he finally agreed it wasn't normal. MY wife and I were like no # Sherlock, think this is where my distrust of doctors come from.


My daughter would just wail turn stiff as a board and cry forever, NurSoy was all she could take and not the powdered, the huge liquid cans that were 30 bucks for a case of 6 . Her second day on it she finally took her evening bottle burped like a biker that drank a case of beer , and fell asleep laying in our bed between my wife and I we all slept straight through till past mid night and never looked back. LOL GOOD TIMES..

a reply to: Irishhaf

Suck it up buttercup...welcome to the rest of your life.



Seriously...once the hormones subside (it'll be a couple of months) things will get easier. Until then, she is still nesting.

originally posted by: Irishhaf
How long is everything I do in regards to the baby is wrong?

Warm up the milk for him... its to hot its to cold..

You did the diaper to tight..

You didn't use enough diaper rash crème...

She is 150% zeroed in on the kid and we are coming up on 1 month and she still hasn't seen the doc for her follow up, or gotten anything else done that she needs to get done because she doesn't want to be away from the baby for 1 second.

I literally have to push her into bed so she can get 4 hours sleep, and god forbid I let her sleep for 5 or 6 hours and feed the kid from her bottled breast milk.

The kid has only gotten on my nerves one time so far... the wife on the other hand...

So any tips, suggestions, or advice are seriously appreciated.

When my big sis had her first baby, she was a control freak, constantly looking into all the small details, always making sure no one would do anything that could possibly affect the baby in any way, no one was allowed to take care of my niece, the way this was fixed was to send my mom for one month to take care of the baby

Once my sis watched from the sides and learned that babies are fragile but not THAT fragile and how calmed my mom was and how she would handle things then stopped being a control freak, i think this is just that at first you can really get worried and you have to make sure that things will be done in the safest way, but it wears off.

If she can see someone else doing things with better experience and see how calmed that other person is and how things that looked like the end of all turn out to be nothing maybe it will help?