posted on Sep, 10 2018 @ 01:34 AM
*note - mods plesase move to correct forum, this isn't really a rant, but it also kind of is, but I feel it is more related to societal issues and
potential civil unrest from the breakdown of many institutions.
**note - the second post/page is where I describe what happened to me, the paragraph on the page before explains the circumstances surrounding the
assault. Note - this happened 20 years ago, so I can understand why some women have kept their mouths shut in many situations.
Before I get into details about what happened to me, I've never talked about it with anyone, but there was a pretty big issue when I was in high
school and college when it came to coaches (and maybe teachers) abusing, harassing, mocking and just making the student's life miserable. The abuse
could be all kinds from talking down to the kid in front of the team, mocking them, harassing them by always picking on them when others are doing the
same thing if not worse and finally physical abuse (I guess sexual is also an issue especially after Sandusky and Nassar, but I haven't witnessed
this. There is also all of those things I mentioned done by team mates, often in front of the coach (so with their approval) and it can lead kids to
This topic is an extension of the "bullying in school" as well as the sexual harassment "MeToo" movement and it can have profound and lifelong
repicussions from these actions. When a coach bullies and mocks you for whatever reason, an athlete may want to push themselves harder, faster,
longer, etc and may even turn to performance enhancing drugs to get the edge they need (they may already be as good as starting teammates but due to
team "politics" of the school/institution or just that the coach or team mates hating them) from the use of steroids to doing "speed" or other
things that could give the person a leg up and to make the coach STFU.
I suffered a case of sabotage by a few team mates when I played football (left gaurd). The center and I had long history, were babysat together and
never had problems until 9th grade when I started playing football. 98% of the team had been playing since probably 1-2nd grade our town is like
Friday Night Lights (from what I hear, never seen it) but more like the town from Varsity Blues (1999 movie) with a 40+ year tradition with state
records and maybe national records for most winning coach - NFL players, many D1 players and slews of D2 & D3, yearly all state players, you name it.
It is the towns unofficial religion. The football program makes most other sports possible due to the amount of money taken in from ticket sales at
the stadium (so it pays for all stadium upkeep/renovations, etc) - then there is the booster club which raises more money for state of the art
equipment, training camps, guest coaches, lots of assistant coaches, etc. BUT all the players are home grown, born and bread in the school district
with the occasional transfer every few years (due to some family emergency of some kind and usually out of state - as compared to other teams of
similar talent/skill who are notorious for recruiting and those are public schools - I won't even go into the catholic schools and charters!) So
there is a lot of pride from the town, school, players and the district as a whole (there are some haters though).
So with that kind of mindset in a town and with a coach with the 3rd or 4th most winning coach in the states history, that puts a lot of pressure on
an abused kid to come forward. My coach was the high school version of Joe Paterno (when it came to in town/county/region celebrity status) and he
also turned a blind eye to a lot of behavior which should not have been tolerated - though he was VERY strict when it was seen or reported & verified.
The issue in cases like this if a player has a problem, there really is no one to turn to (the principal and vice principal were ex players for him,
or the wrestling coach), and the other coaches (for wrestling, were probably worse but not as well known at the time). If a student made an allegation
that would get the coach in trouble or the team or star player, then that student would be in for a world of hurt - alienation, mocking, phsyical
abuse, threats and much more - and that is just during the school day, in the school/hallways. It would get worse at practice, at the gym or riding
bus to school or walking. It would be like accusing a beloved preacher/minister/reverend of some heinous act.
My senior year there was an new head lineman coach (3rd year on team, but promoted to head job), he was a few years out of college where he was a
lineman at a decent school. He was big, tough and intimidating to us youngins. He worked as a sub/temp physed teacher (coach probably using up his
accumulated sick days to get new coach some hours to make his position legit) but his main job was a corrections officer for very troubled youth to
young adults - these were some bad kids from the city who showed zero respect and were very violent. We heard some stories and it sounded like a
scary violent place to work. I think he carried over that mindset to our practices for some people that he didn't like - maybe he was venting on
people he didn't care for (me and a couple others, but I was able to make jokes about what he said when he insulted me or mocked me. Oddly he
wasn't a bad coach and did try to help me at times.
W/o getting into all the details of why this happened (it is very complex and deals with one other player - the center - sabotaging me on some
speccific plays - as I was the left guard). In the play when the center snaps the ball he is supposed to take a step forward with his foot furthest
away from me, then pivot about 30-40 degrees towards me while running towards the linebacker or tackle that was in front of me. My job was to pull to
the right, behind the center and block/kick-out (aka Trap) the defensive tackle that was allowed to pass through the line and then the running back
would run behind me and through the hole I had just made in the line for an average of 6-8 yards (but could be as far as a touchdown if done
correctly).. The problem is the center was taking a step backwards with his foot closest to me and then either stood there until I ran into him, or
took anothe step backwards to garuntee I would run into him. On a run play, the center NEVER does this and it should be obvious to anyone watching
what was happening. This was also the first string center (I was second string b/c I didn't play junior year b/c I worked) and he always had a
problem with me. The coaches would go balistic when this happened and I would be singled out and mocked, ridiculed, and at one point this was yelled
so loud anyone within 200-300 yards could hear: "Jesus Christ, Ghod dnamit. (with proper swearing) (insert my last name here) you are the dumbest
phuking... errr ummmm.... smart kid I have ever met" all while breaking his clipboard, stomping up to me while screaming and grabbing my facemask
and flicking it areund. I tried to explain what was happening but he said 'run again, and same thing, but more cussing and more abuse, this time with
the offensive lineman coach jumping in. So it happened 2x in a row. Now is where it gets bad - the previous was kind of "normal".