Grandma shoots masterbating cyclist trying to break into her house!

www.foxnews.com...

There is just too much going on here for me to absorb. A guy riding a bike, masterbating and breaking into a house. Talk about multitasker, someone get this guy a job!

A nice neighborly granny. She'll tell you once, she'll tell you twice, but don't make her tell you three times or she'll pop a cap in you.

This lady is my spirit animal and good aim MeeMaw!!

a reply to: JAGStorm

Is it wrong if I think the title is hilarious?

originally posted by: CriticalStinker
a reply to: JAGStorm

Is it wrong if I think the title is hilarious?

Best of the day/week/month? ??

a reply to: CriticalStinker

When I read the story I laughed for ten minutes!!

"Mrs. Jean has some advice for anyone who tries to bring drama to her home again: "They better stay away."

originally posted by: Jefferton

originally posted by: CriticalStinker
a reply to: JAGStorm

Is it wrong if I think the title is hilarious?

Best of the day/week/month? ??

It's in the runnings for all three.

a reply to: JAGStorm

Haha, too rich.

I trust she beat him to the "shot".

Woof, I'm going straight to hell.

This dude gives us normal masturbating cyclists a bad name.

Now we'll never get to the Olympics.

a reply to: JAGStorm

The linked article states "Police said investigators were working to determine whether the woman would face charges".

That's kind of odd... Isn't Texas a 'Stand your ground' state?

I mean, how much more of a clean cut 'Stand your ground' incident could you get, than a masturbating cyclist trying to break into your home?

a reply to: Subaeruginosa

If she shot him in the back, she is screwed. (It's truly impossible to say anything in this thread without it looking like a joke).

a reply to: Subaeruginosa

www.kxan.com...


Granny Jean says she went and grabbed her pistol when she realized the man wasn't listening.

"And he kept coming and reached for my door after it was locked so I shot through the door," she said.

The grandma fired just one shot and hit the man in the chest. Police say the 38-year-old required surgery after the incident but he is expected to be okay.

"I don't bother nobody, I don't get in nobody's business," she said. "It's just me and him. And like I keep saying, I warned him."

Maybe she only shot after he discharged his weapon?

That would be pretty straight forward self defense.

And I thought I had the strangest wanking tales

How the eff is that even possible?

Never mind I don't want to know.

Good for granny.

The cyclist deserved what he got.

The Darwin Award.

a reply to: CriticalStinker

Uh no. First thing I thought was wow multitasking taken to new levels.

Can't flag. Don't know what's going on.

Did he come and go at the same time?

There really IS something very stimulating about riding in tight bike shorts.
I love mine.

a reply to: JAGStorm

Never trust a grown man who still rides a bike.

Especially if they wear the tight pants.

Perhaps theres a forum where those WTF threads that to be honest need preserving

Clearly...

An old lady was having trouble getting over her husband's death.
She decided to end her life early, to be with her beloved in the afterlife.

She went to see her doctor the next day..
“Doctor, where is my heart?”

“On a woman’s body, it is just below the left breast.”

Wth that, the old lady goes home
takes her husband’s loaded handgun,
and shoots herself

the shot ricochets off of the helmet of the helmet of ...
...Mr masturbating cyclist !!

who calls 911.

Paramedics arrive ...
Old lady gets admitted with a gun-shot wound to the left foot