posted on Jun, 17 2019 @ 10:50 AM
I've been meaning to update this post forever, and once I get on ATS, I check messages and new topics and completely forget! But not this time...
First, a BIG THANK YOU TO EVERYONE!!! You all helped me be a good friend, and that's probably the best thing I could have done.
I talked to my friend this weekend and he's doing pretty good. I'd gone by his house one day to see how his gardens were doing. There were roofers
next door checking me out, so I sent him a text to tell him if anyone told him an old lady was wandering in his yard, it was just me. I offered to
help him thin out the bulbs in the fall and replant the gardens. He was pretty excited about that. I helped him plant the beds when he bought the
house, and we had a blast that day. So I thought it might be something fun for him to do again and look forward to.
He has quit drinking. He just told me that the doctors told him he wouldn't be able to do another detox, his heart couldn't take it, so this was his
best and last hope. He apparently took it to heart and he's muddled through.
Because of the heart conditions found, they weren't able to give him the meds that many alcoholics receive. But the CBD gummies helped him quite a
bit, especially with sleeping and eating issues, so that was a godsend for him. He's been attending AA meetings at a church close to his house. He's
actually still living with his parents, but his own home is only half a mile away.
He fell off a ladder at Christmas while putting up decorations, and broke a couple bones and a concussion, and his dad insisted on a blood alcohol
test when he went to the hospital. I don't blame him. But it was clear for alcohol -- yay!!! So my friend's been recovering from the fall as well.
Probably the best news of all though is that he finished his schooling and is starting a job this week as a phlebotomist. He had gotten most of the
way through, then the alcoholism got in the way. But he was able to pick up the classes again, and is now certified. He has four weeks training, but
he's very much looking forward to it. I'm pretty excited for him too!
What isn't so easy to fix are all the broken relationships and friendships he racked up while he was drinking. I know more than I want to know about
his bad behavior, but I also know that I don't know the half of it. And it's probably best that way. I know enough to tell him that he really
screwed up, and that love and trust cannot be regained as easily as health. I've told him that he really cannot expect much from his exes, and to
focus on his girls. I've told him that it might take a lifetime for them to trust him again, but they will always love him. The only thing he can do
is be his best self, all day every day, and let the girls see it for themselves. I don't know any other way to regain trust once it is violated.
So in the end, I think the only good I accomplished was getting him the first order of CBD gummies, and just being a friend with a shoulder to cry on
and a heart to share his progress and accomplishments. I couldn't have done it without the advice and wisdom I got here though, so THANK YOU ALL!!!
I was pretty darn clueless about all this, and I got some real good information to use.
At the risk of sounding melodramatic, we may have saved a life. And I think that's pretty darn amazing.
So score 1 for Awesome ATSers!!!
And, again, thank you all soooooooooooooooo much