Spider in mouth

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: Allaroundyou


The only way this friggin story could be worse is if there was a tiny clown in there too.

I give you the Pennywise Spider

a reply to: auroraaus


Punch yourself. Hard.

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

Too busy digging that big hole with the shovel you told me to buy from the store.

a reply to: Allaroundyou

Really? He just wanted a kiss!

He should have known better, spider-men get eaten all the time.

#Feminism

a reply to: auroraaus

Look at that derpy spider!

Heh!

I prefer eating spiders when I am asleep! That way, I don't know I did it!

a reply to: Allaroundyou

LOL, if people would have to rate any bug they hate and despise it's would probably be the spider. My son is muscular young man, yet when it comes to spiders he quickly turns to a squeamish little girl. I could just imagine if the same thing happened to him. He would probably be an emotional wreck and would have to seek professional help.

a reply to: Allaroundyou

Vomit, light yourself on fire, good god man don’t swallow it.

The spider has won.

a reply to: Allaroundyou

I want to see OP blow webs out his azz.
On you tube.

Chomped and swallowed it!!

Savage!

a reply to: auroraaus

Looks more like a Juggalo Spider.

They don't list spiders in the nutrition databases.

originally posted by: Allaroundyou
So I was sleeping quite comfortably. Then I wake up to a sharp pain on the top part of my mouth. When I woke up the thing was still in my mouth. I quickly chomped down and ate that mofo. My mouth is slightly swollen but not to the point I can’t enjoy my coffee. What a horrible way to start the day I must say. (I’m a poet

) I reacted quickly with the eating the predator part. So now I am up at the early hour of 4AM. No point in trying to go back to sleep so I will enjoy some coffee and a few cigs and get ready. FU spiders

Well I just finished my meeting and did not get a chance to use my PowerPoint that I prepared (Jimmy I know you are here and that is your fault). I told a doctor what had happened and he just looked at me and said “your fine”. So all is good I guess. But you Jimmy.....My office NOW

I am appalled by the glibness and flippancy of some of the comments in this thread.

Bereft is humanity, woe is you, shame, shame!

originally posted by: Allaroundyou
So I was sleeping quite comfortably. Then I wake up to a sharp pain on the top part of my mouth. When I woke up the thing was still in my mouth. I quickly chomped down and ate that mofo. My mouth is slightly swollen but not to the point I can’t enjoy my coffee. What a horrible way to start the day I must say. (I’m a poet

) I reacted quickly with the eating the predator part. So now I am up at the early hour of 4AM. No point in trying to go back to sleep so I will enjoy some coffee and a few cigs and get ready. FU spiders

< covers mouth with both hands and runs away crying hysterically >

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: Allaroundyou


The only way this friggin story could be worse is if there was a tiny clown in there too.

I had a Jumping Spider watching me use the bathroom this morning. Played hell catching the bastard, but I eventually did, and flushed his ass. That's the third one I've caught since yesterday evening. A few days ago, I had one pounce my hand on the computer, I just instinctively flicked it away without looking, I assumed something more mundane like a Stink Bug or moth. F#er came right back for more, too. Damn things are aggressive in my house, man.

We have the occasional Wolf Spider running through the basement now and then. My husband likes to catch them and play with them. Then comes up to me all "Hey, look what I found downstairs!" And I'm 100% 'GET THE F# AWAY FROM ME, YOU SICK BASTARD."

Ortho is a damn good insecticide, for everything BUT spiders, it seems. Either than or ours are mutants, immune to insecticide.

a reply to: Nyiah


I would nuke your house from orbit if I could.

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: Nyiah


I would nuke your house from orbit if I could.

Some days, so would I. They're a bit more numerous than usual this year and preventative measures don't seem to be doing jack s# to dissuade them any. We're not remotely at an infestation level of spider numbers, the numbers overall are quite low in general, but 1 is still too goddamn many.

a reply to: Allaroundyou

what kinda poems? flower poems? BTW I hear we eat 3 spiders and year. put the coffee on

a reply to: Allaroundyou

Pissed my pants!

No really. Just did. Sorry.

About the spider though?

originally posted by: DBCowboy
About the spider though?

I think if the spider were inside a jelly donut that was inside your mouth you'd gobble that thing up without a second thought.

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: DBCowboy
About the spider though?

I think if the spider were inside a jelly donut that was inside your mouth you'd gobble that thing up without a second thought.

Actually had that happen to a friend of mine in Florida growing up, except it was one of the giant-ass flying cockroaches that ate it's way in near to the middle overnight, left a hole that wasn't seen until way too late. As an adult, I remembered that and stowed my donuts in the fridge. Screw that, don't need insect protein in that large of an amount