uncomfortable situation at work. how would you have handled it?

a reply to: Sillyolme

i just look at it like i look at most other things. if someone does not like a thing and asks/tells you to stop then you stop.

then its done

a reply to: TinySickTears

I went to school with a Fijian dude that was like that. It creeped me out at first. It was the first time I met someone that did that. From what I remember reading, people do it as a way to make them feel less nervous or comfortable in social situations or something.

Writing your manager was the best thing to do. The guy sounds fairly annoying and if he didn't stop after you ask him that's the next step. Don't hit him...don't attack someone at work it's not worth it. You will get # for it no matter what.

Do like I did when that happened to me...

As her rubbed my shoulders I looked him square in the eye and started licking my lips with a slight smile, then I winked.
He no longer did that, as a matter of fact, he stopped talking to me.
Actually, looking back, everyone stopped talking to me... Weird...

originally posted by: recrisp
Do like I did when that happened to me...

As her rubbed my shoulders I looked him square in the eye and started licking my lips with a slight smile, then I winked.
He no longer did that, as a matter of fact, he stopped talking to me.
Actually, looking back, everyone stopped talking to me... Weird...

If someone ever did that to me then I think we would be best friends after that. That is too funny.
That is my type of humor man.

Ah, the work fondler.

Just tell him politely that it's inappropriate. Record the times and dates, so keep a diary. Keep it professional. Go and discuss with senior management.

Touching at work is an odd one. If people won't change their behaviour then it should become a management issue. Excusing it away as "well it's just the way he/she is" is not the way to do it. While it may be innocent, it could can also be a control mechanism, or even sexual.

Just keep it professional.

You handled it correctly. First complained to him, then his and your supervisor.

I had a similar problem at work with what the Australians call a "Bogan" and a squeaky chicken. After things escalated within two days and literally gave me a minor stroke and arterial ulcer, I complained directly to HR. My software manager put me under performance review. I was gone in six months.

a reply to: TinySickTears

stick with the chain of command and don't go outside of it. Dude just needs to be told by someone of authority. You didn't look mean enough when you said it. Try puffing your chest out.

Hand on shoulder, immediate wrist lock. Especially after you've contacted your supervisor and his about it. A simple little wrist lock will get the point across and if worse comes to worse you can claim self defense.

My .02

a reply to: TinySickTears

'mornin TST. I think you handled this very well.

I have to steady Middle Eastern elderly women every day...where they may be culturely offended...it's done in a matter of their safety...

Whereas it's not done..unrelated men to not touch middle eastern women...I never gotten any complaints.

Your situation is odd..very. I think he has some agenda ..maybe not...but you handled it well and did the right thing!

Cya TST...it's always a pleasure! MS

Just make sure you print out a copy of the email you sent to supervisor. Should it escalate and you you need to report up the chain, it will be hard for them to claim you never reported it.

As others have said, you have every right to your space and to go untouched by anyone.

You handled it very well,lots of good advice all ready,so I won`t ask if you know any bikers that would follow him home and have a friendly conversation about how friends getting harassed make them feel like using someones head for a football.Heard that works really well ,though.

a reply to: TinySickTears

Sounds good to me. You should only have to ask once.

There is a chain of command you must follow when reporting " incidents " at work . ...That way you do not get in trouble . .... And make sure you Keep records of all emails. If using a work email address ,Make sure you print a copy or have a copy of email ,If you should leave the company or be fired you will no longer have access to your work email .... Always put complaints in writing so you have a paper trail ....and do you know the dates of the other times you told this guy to Not to touch you ? Maybe write them down as a log of events ...You may need that too if called into office to explain past history of telling this guy not to touch you ... Hopefully your complaint will end the touching , but you never know ..... Do not be fired for aggressive behavior or fighting at work .... Handle this correctly through the proper channels that have been established for this ....the Supervisor , HR , etc ....it will eventually be taken care of ....in the mean time , if he touches you , make sure you pull away and
Say to stop . .... Are there cameras in your woke area ?

a reply to: Meldionne1

cameras all over the place

Swiftly execute a Squat-Thrust Spinning Uppercut Nut-Punch to your foil. Known as "Das Grunndull Hammarr" in German....

a reply to: TinySickTears

a reply to: TinySickTears

Thats what millions of women are regulary going through. But you are a man and thats an advantage.
What to do? Just tell this person to stop. If its not working, you have to tell your boss. Or you write the person a mail and make your point clear.

a reply to: TinySickTears

Next time he does it jerk your shoulder out of his hand and tell him that ," I have asked you many times to keep your hands off me. If you do it again I am reporting you to HR."

I would even tell the guy that I don't want to talk with him unless it's work related.

I am always upfront with touchy people that try and be my friend when I don't want them to be.

Maybe a work jacket with metal spikes on the shoulders?

Sorry you are having to deal with this creepiness.

a reply to: Allaroundyou

I think it would be a benifit to the work force if we forced employers to use a third party service for anonymous claims.

I made an anonymous claim once only to find out that it was anything but anonymous which actually increased my anxiety towards the situation and ended up in me leaving the company for mental stability.

To the OP This is difficult situation to be in. Hopefully this can be resolved without any emotional trauma to either side. I believe you are taking the right steps.

Next time he rubs your shoulder, start rubbing his. Hard. With direct and intense eye contact.