So while we're on the subject of 'rants'...
McDonald's, what have you done; is your corporate goal to make the most awful food on Earth? What happened? You used to be so awesome!
I mean, could you possibly make the patties on the Big Mac any smaller? We'd love that if you could do that! Why not change the name to Big 'ol
And you know, I just LOVE cold french fries. Have you ever considered refrigerating them? I mean, they could be colder, you know?
What happened to the Quarter Pounder? A "Quarter" of what...dried out old old Nike shoe? But hey, put some cheese on it and we're good, right? Of
COURSE we have to buy that $4 dollar drink! The damn burger sponged every ounce of liquid out of my spleen!
"Value Meal"???? (Gawd, I'm just dyin' here!) LOLOLOL!!! "Value" to YOU maybe, McDonald's, but it certainly ain't no 'value' to us!! So help us
all understand this, McDonald's...a Big Mac costs $4, fries cost $1 and a drink costs $2, but the "Value Meal" cost's $8 dollars??? How does
work??? That 'value' left a reverse-mohawk streak down the top of my skull. You really should consider changing the name; "Three-Card
Monte Meal" has a nice ring to it. Or, how about the "SUCKAAAAH Meal"? That works too.
Okay, let's see, there just MUST be something good at your joint. How about some Chicken McNuggets? MMMMmmmmmMMMMmmm, just love the taste of
cardboard! What is that stuff anyway? Is it even real? I've eaten mud mixed with sawdust which tasted better. Oh, and do we really have to beg for
the 2nd dipping sauce??? I mean c'mon, one sauce isn't even enough to choke down 2 of those things...and there's 10 of those little gems in the box!
And correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't they supposed to be like actually fried??? As in, like in actual OIL and kinda' hot? I love my microwave
too, but there's just nothing better than quasi-fried food (I guess it was fried...somewhere...wasn't it???) which has been warmed up in a sterile
plastic tray and then placed in a Chinese cardboard box with all sorts of absolutely deeelicious chemicals in it to add extra flavor. Oh, but wait,
you didn't microwave them at all did you? Nope, everybody LOVES cold DRY McNuggets, they're the BEST!
Would you like to Super-Size that? Oh HELL YA! I want a whole pickup load of cold stale ass fries! I'll definitely need that extra-large drink with
those!! And the Big Mac with the two tiny 'dots' of meat, a gallon of thousand island dressing and a half a loaf of bread...oh, it's just sooo
wonderful, I can't wait to stand in line for one. Oh yeah, and then have to go wait "over there" for you to toss all that food you prepared last
Monday into a bag...WAIT...not all of it, because you forgot something so I'll just love coming back and asking for the meal I actually ordered, and
not the Happy Meal for customer #641 (I was customer #367).
Yeah, you're awesome, McDonald's! No wonder nobody who speaks English wants to work the counter! That's awesome. I've learned words in Somalian I
never even knew before!
And who is it that actually assembles the food back there? I mean c'mon, how hard can it be, really?? The bun goes down first, then the patty, then
the cheese, some sauce, then the other bun, then the other patty (well you get the idea). Why then did I just get a Big Mac with bun, patty, patty,
cheese, bun, bun?? Is it really that hard?
Can I get a refill on my drink?? I'm REALLY thirsty!! No??? Another $4 bucks huh?
edit on 6/29/2018 by Flyingclaydisk because: (no reason given)