The Stories I could tell

I'm old, and the stories I could tell are amazing. It's funny, many of them, I've seen so much. I've seen so many things, in my life.

In some ways it's sad, and I wish it could be different. I wish some of the stories weren't even real, but they are. The things I remember are just...well, hurtful sometimes. I remember everything.

I have this weird memory; I remember everything, every phone number, every date, every moment...every single detail. I remember every single thing ever since I was a little kid. It's weird (and it even freaks my wife out). There is no such thing as a "photographic" memory, but there is another name for it I think. In some ways it's a curse. I remember everything, in intricate detail. I have all this useless trivia, all this data. It means nothing now, most of it.

I remember every phone number of everyone on my street when I was 7 years old...and every number of every person I ever knew after that. It's a horrible thing. Like I said, it's almost a curse. Talk about useless trivia, well I have it.

I remember every weight, every social security number, every shoe size...every single thing. I don't know why, but I do.

Shoot, I can even remember the shoe size of a gal I wanted to date nearly 45 years ago. It's just crazy what I remember. (I remember her name, address, phone number and even the license plate number on her car (make, model and year)). I probably dated 75 gals, and I remember those details on all of them. So, you're thinking I'm a stalker, right? But Im not. Those same details, I remember about all my best friends. I remember every model of their cars, the license plates, the make, model and engines, the mileage...just every single detail. It's crazy, and I don't know why.

For some reason, I just paid attention on a different level than most people do. I see things most don't. Even my wife freaks out about it, saying I see things other people just don't see. I don't know why.

For my part, I'm pretty much ambivalent about all of it. I don't know why I see the things I do; I don't know why they matter to me.

I could tell a thousand stories, stories of things I've seen. The intricate details would likely be boring, but for some reason they're important to me. I don't know why, but they are.

To me, ATS seems like a wonderful place, because where else could you ever tell a story like this?

I think you are alluding to a eidetic memory. I know maybe you see it as a curse, but it sure would have been useful for some of the tests I took in school.

When I was just a little kid, maybe 6 or so, I had to go into the hospital and have surgery. I remember that day, those days.

I had to stay over (in the hospital) for a couple days.. What I am about to tell here is a very profound story, a defining moment in my life. I was just a kid of 6.

I had this surgery, gut surgery, and I had to stay over for a couple nights. There was no one there. After visiting hours, my parents and everyone went home. The place got quiet. It was night.

On the third night I was bored, and I woke up. I left my room and walked down the hall (I was 6, but I remember this moment vividly, like no other).

The hospital hallway was dimmed down, it was night. I wasn't supposed to be up and walking around, but I was. I walked by several rooms and at one point this person said..."HI". I didn't know where it came from, but he said it again..."HI"

I looked around and couldn't see anything, except for this crazy hospital bed with about a 8' diameter metal ring around it. It was where the sound came from. I looked and this kid, just like me, said "HI" He was a nice kid, and he just wanted to talk. I was 6, and I was alone.

It's a long story, but this little boy, just like me, had broken his neck...and he was in this crazy bed which rotated like a big wheel. (this was late 60's). He was a nice kid, and he just wanted to talk, to someone...anyone.

I learned about "forever" in that moment.

You know, most parents and adults want to coach you, tell you and make you behave a certain way, but that night, it was just us...two little boys discovering life. He said he didn't think he would ever walk again. I remember that, it was profound to me. I told him, encouragingly, he would. But he knew different. He was very matter of fact about it, but he seemed to dwell on the fact he wouldn't walk again. Sadly, it was worse than that. He was a quadriplegic, so not only would he not walk again, but he also wouldn't use his arms/hands ever again.

Before that moment, "forever" seemed like when you went to the first day of school in August, and the month of May when school was out was "forever", but this was different.

He asked me I would get this comic book off the nightstand for him. I did. He asked me to turn the pages. I started reading the comic captions. He said, "I"m not blind, I just can't walk, or use my arms!"". I felt so bad, but we learned something from each other that day.

I remember.

I have an eidetic memory... it is more of a curse, than a blessing.

Yes, I kick a$$ on standardized tests, "Trivial Pursuit" and "Jeopardy!"... I remember trivial crap of no real importance.

...I don't, however, have that filter that impairs or blocks traumatic memories. I REALLY wish that I did... I can never escape my own nightmares.

a reply to: madmac5150

With all due respect...how many digits behind the decimal can you recite "Pi" for?

Sadly, I'm good for about (30), maybe more.

I've known people who could go for over (100) or more.

3.141592653589793238462643383279502884..and I think there's a 179 (or 197) after that. I could be wrong.

a reply to: madmac5150

Regarding Jeopardy, I can usually RULE on that show, but I will often miss some of the really easy ones. I'd never be a contender.

The high dollar questions are a slam dunk for me. (Wife keeps telling me to apply for that show, but I'm not sure I could get through the easy stuff)

Probably never get on it anyway.

DP

Las Vegas comes to mind...

Back on topic...

How do you get away from all those numbers?

I hire Engineers (I'm a Physicist) and it freaks people out when I calculate complex equations just straight up in my head. I don't know why. They're often not exact numbers, but they're really close (without any calculators or other aids).

It's like there's this "sense" of magnitudes and relative orders.

Shoot, I should stop.

Sorry.

a reply to: Plotus

I WISH!

Those numbers strike me as somehow "negative" in my mind when I play.

I can't describe it really, but I can play the game, but I know the game is ALWAYS against me.

I can see the odds in my head, and I know when to get out. I can count the cards, and see the faces, but with 4-5 decks the odds are stacked. Dealer wins...always! Might pick up a few bucks in between, but the dealer always wins!!!

ETA...I'm gonna' start another thread about Vegas and gambling. (stand by)

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

Write a book.

I never pursued memorizing digits of Pi... I have no need to, and it sounds like an epic waste of time.

I don't have a photographic memory... not totally. It's really difficult to explain, but I will try. I can draw an accurate floor plan of the house I lived in until I was 6 years old. I can still see, in detail, the crappy old black and white RCA television that we had. I remember watching President Ford's inauguration (I was 4) on that same crappy TV. That same year, my neighbor was cutting our grass, and a rock shot out... gashing my head wide open. I remember every stitch like it was yesterday.

I cannot, however, remember what color the carpeting was...

...the wallpaper was hideous, though... I do remember that.

The really traumatic crap... the bad stuff that most people can repress... I can't. I was abused badly from age 8 until 11, and I remember every single horrifying detail. It can be a very sad reality... a nightmare you never quite wake up from...

That is what it is actually like. I have been doing my best to drink that ability away for years...

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

I'm in the same boat-I have what I call semi eidetic memory and it's a two edged sword and I think you'll agree that it's like having images burned into your mind.

I can remember moments in my life that I can recall that would seem at the least implausible. I can remember the exact time of my birth and the the name of the doctor despite looking at my original birth certificate once when I was 12 (4:12 PM delivered by A. jones) and I remember the phone number of my old primary school despite the fact it was more than twenty years ago. Oh and a Yaks' milk is pink-I read that on a Tuesday in 1994.

However it is a double edged sword-I am a trivia wizard but however I have PTSD due to traumatic events in my childhood so those images never leave you. Perhaps you should write a memoir.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

I know where your coming from

a reply to: madmac5150

I can relate-I won't speak of my traumas or ask of yours so i'll tell a tale that relates to the OP.

The year is 1991 and I got pantsed-I was wearing grey track pants and they revealed blue underwear, I also remember reading a gaming magazine describing a boss from Bart vs The Space Mutants as 'old but not feeble' and I can recall the image-are you feeling old yet?

I think as the generations pass, the less they seen to actually "see" and "do". The idea of a holiday is lying seal-like on a beach, or going to a rave, or doing a bungee jump (which is certified risk free).

I have been around and done quite a bit. Travelled far and lived in five countries, including my native England. I've collected a few stories, but my father had stories that were just amazing, but probably only really got to about 10% before he kicked the bucket, while my elderly mother had such an open life judging by the photos and stories. Never knew my grandparents much before they keeled over, except that both grandfathers served through WW2 , so like everyone of their generation they would have been entitled to laugh in the face of the current snowflake generation of expectant victims - "...bungee jumping scare you, you poor thing. Here have my let me dab your eyes".

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

I have a super power where I can remember lyrics to really, really crappy songs from the 80's, but have no idea why I just went into the kitchen.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

Wow. I'm going to go out on a limb and predict no "old timer's" disease for you....



I remember how to spell and say Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis. How's that?

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk
Jorge Luis Borges wrote a short story called "Funes the memorious" about a man with a more extreme case. You might find that interesting.

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

I can relate in another sense, as I have a somewhat detailed audiographic memory that is oriented to music itself. Even at a young age, I was able to accurately play a tune on my instrument after listening to it on the radio, or another person play it. I also don't rely on sheet music once it's in my head, and can transpose the part I'm playing to fit another key.

I can remember every song I've played since 5th grade, and can recall the song just as easily as one can open a folder on their computer.

However, in my case it's both a blessing and a curse: Blessing in that if I ever forgot any sheet music, I'm all set. The curse is that my brain seems to only be partitioned for storing music, not sounds in general (IE: I won't remember what you said yesterday, but I will remember it if you sung it). My normal memory is probably faulty due to this as well.

-foss