alligator husbandry 101:
... (channeling the crocodile hunter as we speak) envision the accent...
Right mate...
ere we are today at a bit of the outback called a swamp to help make baby alligators...
first thing is to collect the little man squirmys.. see these big boys ain't so big, since they have been TOXIFIED by hormones...They can't really physically do the mating thing, becuase they have been chemically affected to have an extordinarily small man tool...So they need our help!
so we ave ta grab the gator behind the snout and hug him tight so as to prevent the teeth from getting at us... cause boy, do they pack a WALLOP!
ginger my dog will distract the gator while i sneak up behind the monsta...
GARRR now that ive manhandled him... i reach around to collect the sperm, which is a little tricky....
(edited for pornographic content)
now that I ave the little squirmys in my jar, we seek out the sexually deprived female gator... yep ya guessed it... this is the fun part.
since she hasn't had the company of a man gator for a good while, she will seek us out from the musty smell of the sexually satisfied man gator that we were snugglin with...
yep here she comes up the bank... boy see how she is charging us... she must want these little wigglers bad... she wants to be a momma...
if i am careful, i can dodge her charge as she comes by, and throw myself on her as she passes... then it is just a matta of doing the opposite reach around and shove a quick fist full of wigglers in the Cloacae... and WALLA... the circle of life goes on...
ok, end of alligator husbandry class...
of course in this case, the offspring would likely be infertile, and the whole process would have ended up doing nothing but sexually satisfying two gators...
I am sure the gators would be grateful, but i would just feel so used...



