I think most of the craziness around this comes from the puritanical POV that “if you sleep with someone. You are sleeping with everyone that person
slept with, and that person slept with, into infinity” and “ that women are lessened somehow by every sexual partner the you have”...
Both are just ridiculous concepts..
I think this has led to women feeling used after some sexual experiences..
This feeling of being used makes them regret those experiences to an unhealthy level. As if something has been stolen from them.. something of extreme
I think this SOMETIMES kinda snowballs into fake rape allegations, claiming they were drunker than they were, exc.. and also semi severe
Idk.. this is gonna sound way controversial, but should rape be viewed as worse than a life and death beating???
SHOULD (not does ) being raped make a lot of people consider suicide, when a really bad beating just becomes a cool war story later???
There are 2 main points I worry about with my own daughter when it comes to the craziness of teenage life..
1) never do anything you personally yourself don’t want to do. Never do anything to make someone like you, or in the hopes you win them over..
Your only being trash if your getting played.. if your the one in control. Then your not getting played.
2) never feel ruined because of a mistake you might have made. It doesn’t lower your value as a person..
I just watched that happen to way too many chics in highscool..
Some things I could advise, working on a thesis on gender myself (when not partying it up on ATS), some pointers I would advise within a college
- Although you may know some of what you write is one-sided, or even nonsense, do not try to subvert the dominant discourse i.e. women are the main,
and longstanding victims of sexism and misogyny in Hollywood (although as the recent "me too" movement, testimonies of former male child stars or
queer theory proves, males have also been the victims of predators). However, do remember not to change the essay or topic into one about masculinity,
and apart from a sentence or two, to keep the main focus on femininity. Especially as undergrad essays are quite short, stick to the topic, and the
focus group it represents (apart from a sentence or two, do not try to represent everybody). By focusing on men, she may be going off topic quickly.
Be careful with some points above raised by others. A college essay is not ATS - do not make this essay about men, or change the topic. Focus on
- She should point out that women are not monolithic. There are race and class differences between women. For example, I've seen clips on YouTube that
Native American actresses often feel stereotyped, and find it hard to get roles outside Western movies. What about lesbian, trans or queer women? Are
such women open to bigger abuses? Is victim-hood itself dominated by middle class and race - or white women's voices? What is her identity as a woman
- or her voice? If your sister is a woman of color (I would definitely mention the maid in Gone With the Wind - equal salaries for all women?),
or a queer woman, I'd find one or two historical examples (Google some actresses) and focus on that. If she is speaking as a white heterosexual woman
(Marilyn Monroe?), I'd make sure to say this in a sentence, and to admit "her privilege". But writing your own female class or race identity into an
academic essay always wins brownie points; "I'm speaking as a ... woman, and hence my focus will be on ... women". Once again acknowledge
specifically the "Other" women, focus on what represents your own voice or identity, and say so. If the identity seems too bland, I say: "I might be a
white privileged woman, but I would also like to explore how queer women of color were treated or represented in film". But for an essay I don't think
that will be necessary.
- Make SURE to mention the patriarchy, and how Hollywood has been linked to all kinds of propaganda and censorship that benefited the patriarchy, from
Anslinger to McCarthyism, direct links to the military-industrial complex and postmodern advertisement (gendered product placement). Also mention
female "raunch culture" (eventually using female sexuality as a means of revolt - from Madonna to Paris Hilton). Is "raunch culture" liberating or
Finally I suggest two recent books, with short but concise intros that may help, and will definitely set her up for the academic stratosphere:
Barker, Chris: Cultural Studies: Theory and Practice. Sage Publications: 2012. Specifically Chapter 9: "Sex, Subjectivity and Representation",
and Chapter 10: "Television, Texts and Audiences" (pages 289-360).
Barker, Meg-John And Scheele, Julia: Queer: A Graphic History. Icon Books: 2016. Specifically pages 103-109, which look for subversive gender
identities from James Bond to Finding Nemo.
Finally here a song about the typical poor-girl-goes to Hollywood (or stardom) from the 1980s.
Poison - Fallen Angel.
I would actually start with a line or two from this song - I mean it's the ultimate starlet stereotype described in narrative/ballad form.
But who did it represent at that point?
The band's imagery was hardly multi-cultural at that point.
When chances were slim, what about the women whose chances were even slimmer?
Conclusion: "So while unpacking my own gender oppression as a woman by the patriarchal, heteronormative superstructure, the topic has also made me
think of how in future I can assist the struggles of my ... sisters because ... [perhaps, "We are living in a multi-cultural, increasingly globalized
world in 2018, in which we need the support of our fellow women. Sexual predators will remain, but our collective voices grow stronger!"
Or something to that effect.
edit on 12-4-2018 by halfoldman because: (no reason given)
I am not a fan of any form of body shaming or dress shaming whatsoever.
I am also against sex shaming.
Being human is being sexual and imo there's nothing wrong with that as long as nobody is being hurt about it. It's a beautiful part of the human
condition that people so often make ugly (like rape, assault, sl-t shaming, accusing people of being witches or possessed so they have to be burned at
the stake kind of things).
And I think healthy people who are secure about their bodies can walk around naked, lol, and that it's actually a sign of insecurity when people try
to disguise and cover up their bodies (out of fear of being judged/rejected/going to hell/or even assaulted) and... those are all horrible unhealthy
states to live in. I know firsthand! I know that there is a religious and cultural conditioning too which I mostly disagree with as well, because it
gives us guilt/shame for having a body and being human. But, if people want to cover their bodies then I'm not going to shame them either for it.
Who am I to dictate what other people should wear or not wear!
I probably am not helping here, lol.
I do think that people can be taken advantage of easily, too. And I do think that Hollywood can definitely feed into our insecurities, making us feel
like we should be beautiful and perfect all the time and if we're not then we suffer from all those fears of being rejected and etc. But at the same
time, it's not wrong to celebrate and respect something that is beautiful, too. We shouldn't have to shame something that is beautiful just because
it makes us feel insecure.
edit on 12-4-2018 by geezlouise because: (no reason given)
The counterargument would be that women are not forced to do those things. They choose to do it in a culture known for advocating and encouraging that
I would even go so far as to say that some of the women who are "subjogated" into that kind of behavior have no moral or ethical issues with it
In the first place. They'll do whatever it takes and they'll do it willingly.
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