Highly emotional

When a young, healthy, seemingly happy young man decides to end his life, that is beyond sad. Especially if you have a child the same age. It reminds you that we have no control nor do we really ever know what is going on in that person's life.

It's hard to admit that some things in life we can't affect, no matter how hard we try.

My daughter went to a small Christian school and out of 20 in her class, three committed suicide shortly after graduation.
Really, confusing-no signs of depression, etc.

Crying is just a natural way of showing how deeply we are affected and care. Some people are stoic about death-alot of us arn't and the circumstances do make a difference.

This was a truly sad story about this young man. Feelings are real as is crying when sad.

Unfortunately, when bad things happen it does make us think more than we'd like. Hug your daughter and have some fun with your family and normality should return. But, hey, it's okay to cry about sad things-then move on. Best wishes.

Have you heard of emotional intelligence (EQ)??

Do you know of the theory of learning via deduction, induction, and abduction?

Here is what I think. A very emotional event hit your small community. It was sudden. It was violent and tragic at the same time. There is a "vibe" in the air. You have "tuned into" that collective vibe. We are social creatures. Why does EQ only have to be personal? Why would the group and the group's feeling not "count" or "matter" too?

There is the belief that our brains have "external limbs" that we use to sense our surroundings. It is called "external cognition" so it is not a hippy-dippy "vibe" thing. The example always used are spiders and how they use their webs to "feel" their surroundings.

Now lets put it all together. You, as a father, in a small town, have been witness to a shared grief. Without being aware, you have applied the rules of deduction: A implies B, B implies C, therefore, A implies C. Your personal EQ, your paternal instincts, have combined with the social EQ to give you a double-dose of empathy.

The communal feeling is hard to hold for extended periods of time. In time you will return back to "normal". But now you will also be more aware of what/how is happening to yourself and those around you.

It is not to be feared or hidden away. It is a growth. A personal growth and a communal growth in EQ.

PS - Here you are on "the web" on a "social media" site wondering wth has happened to you! How's that for another example of extended cognition?!!

originally posted by: InhaleExhale
a reply to: Raggedyman

We live in a manworld that seems to think it's shameful

I think times are a changing though.


I agree in the past, not near past but a generation or 2 or 3 ago it was more frowned upon by blokes and some of the ladies but I think it was due to how it made some tough guys feel, uncomfortable.
That is just personal opinion based on popular cultural stereotypes.

I mean even today there are both male and females that feel the same way, some ladies might find it unattractive that a man is emotional where as others find it attractive that a man can express his emotions.

Not asking,mashing what I think, feel

I sort of thought that because you didn't punctuate with a question mark after saying that, my misinterpretation.


Its good to share feelings

Yeah, yes it is good to share feelings, certainly is

Thank you all for the kind words.
As I said in my original post, I'm not sure there's a solution or really if it's a problem.
Either things will go back to normal or I'll just have to adjust.
Damn, I can't even listen to the radio now...lol
Definitely going to be a learning experience.

originally posted by: Bluntone22
Thank you all for the kind words.
As I said in my original post, I'm not sure there's a solution or really if it's a problem.
Either things will go back to normal or I'll just have to adjust.
Damn, I can't even listen to the radio now...lol
Definitely going to be a learning experience.

I don’t want to be nosy and ask your age Bluntone... but there comes a time in both a man and a woman’s life where hormones change. It is common for men to experience a rise in estrogen during these times rendering them softer and more emotional in their later years. I wouldn’t worry too much about it, as I think it’s healthy for men to show their softer , more nurturing side.

I didn’t read through the whole thread.. so someone may have already pointed that out.

a reply to: Sheye

46 long long years...

originally posted by: Bluntone22
a reply to: Sheye

46 long long years...

Probably too young for hormonal changes.. lol.. but everyone is different!

a reply to: Sheye

I have been described as different....
But I prefer unique..

As has been said already, suicide is a real emotional subject, and very different when it's up close compared to just hearing it on the news.

It does feel weird though when you are not used to being so emotional. I've been going to through the same thing over the last couple of weeks, I took my daughter to start her basic training in the British Army.....having served myself, I helped her with her fitness as well as advice, tips and support to do what she said she wanted to do.

Yet the slightest thing recently has made me well up. I looked up "empty nest syndrome", as it sounds very much like that...but jeez it's making me tear up all the damn time lol.

Different reasons to yours I know, just wanted to let you know you're not alone on the leaky eyes front.

CX.