I wanted to share something that just happened and has me laughing to myself.
I normally dont post about or even talk about my little shenanigans here and there on my journey in life.
I am a quiet shenanigan-er.
Any hoo, I was eating some pizza as per my after work tradition. The pizza shop is right next to the subway I take home so everyday that I work, I eat
Right outside there are tables with merchants. Fruit stands, hats, gloves, purses and so on.
This is the south Bronx and there are some low lives concentrated in the area. Cops are deployed like it was a concentration camp.
So, there is a guy in front of me looking at stuff on one of the tables. Im munching by a phone booth I lean on and rest my drink on.
I see the vender is saying to stop and the guy is holding a hat. He is wearing an old crap one.
He looks like a die hard scum bag. The guy didnt see me, so I walked up right beside him, snatched the hat and threw it back at the vender.
I didnt stop to look, talk, nothing.
If I did the guy would have tried to whoop my ass right there. He immediately starts following me as people start laughing. He was probably unsure
what the hell just happened at first but he figured out it was me quickly after.
Im a fast walker, so I lead him to a street around the corner where I know there are no cops or cameras.
I am technically in the wrong at this point for taking something out of his hands like that and dont want to get arrested for something so dumb.
Also, this street is short and leads back so I could loop back around to the other subway entrance to my train right across the street without being
seen if I wanted to.
Thats what I did.
Thats not the funny part. While I was walking away with scum lord screaming and trying to catch me without running, we cross the intersection.
At one point he asks why the Ef did I do that. That it was HIS hat. Nope. (New like the 20 others on the table.)The vender was looking right at him
and screaming for him to stop in spanish)
"Bull Ssst" I say and look back at him. He slows down and thinks we are going to throw down right there. Thats not my intention. I see something
coming closer to us....
So, I stop, turn around and tell him to "go get your hat, it looked like you were jacking it. But go ahead, get your hat now, its right over there"
"Steal it now that they are watching you"
He said something more about how he was going to buy it.
At this point we're in the intersection about to turn onto that street I mentioned, when who comes driving by behind us but a NYPD van.
Their windows are down and they heard the last part I quoted here.We are on the divider basically in the middle of the road, really close to the
Mr scumbag turned really small and his voice cracked.
You ever seen that look of rage and frustration in children when it feels like they are about to throw a teary temper tantrum.
Missing his 2 top front teeth, crusty lips tightly curled under his rat hair mustache....squinty angry eyes... skin getting flush.
I kept walking but I know the cops lingered and probably started the "do you have any warrants, ID please" process.
Funniest thing I did all week.
Im only a little upset that in the process of snatching the hat, he pushed me slightly into a table as I was passing by, which knocked over some
merchandise that was on the corner. Nothing broke but I did freak at that moment for a second. lol
It would have been a flawless ninja karma trolling. It looked like he did it to everyone anyways, which was awesome, but I know.
So thats it. I had to share this one, it was too funny.
Support your local street venders!
They do hard work everyday outside in the cold, heat, rain and snow.
Have a good one!
edit on 2 17 2018 by tadaman because: (no reason given)