It looks like you're using an Ad Blocker.

Please white-list or disable AboveTopSecret.com in your ad-blocking tool.

Thank you.

 

Some features of ATS will be disabled while you continue to use an ad-blocker.

 

US Girls Self-Harming, Trying Suicide at Increasing Rate

page: 5
12
<< 2  3  4    6 >>

log in

join
share:

posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 12:16 AM
link   
a reply to: CulturalResilience

No doubt that would solve a lot of our modern problems, but only because we'd be too busy suffering from old problems to create new ones. It's not a sustainable solution, it just resets the cycle, dulls the spiritual pain with physical pain. Just like cutting.
edit on 25-11-2017 by Cutepants because: (no reason given)




posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 02:58 PM
link   
a reply to: silo13

Hey, sorry: I got to this thread late, but it is maybe the most important thread from which I can seek some answers recently.

I have read what people have said so far.

I have a 13 year old daughter who scratches herself when she is under stress, and she tries to hide it.

She just uses her fingernails so far, and she hides her wounds. I did offer to rub some Neosporin on her arm, which is what she scratches that I know of so far, and she refused. Then ... I got a little angry -- what does a parent do? I told her not to hurt herself, and that if she did not want medicine, I could rub some salt in her wounds. She said 'yes' ... so I rubbed some salt in a scabbed scratch on her arm, trying to provide a deterrent ... but she didn't even flinch. I was in shock, and stepped away. So, wtf is wrong with us both?

What to do about this?

I have a cousin who is a 'cutter', and she has had a really rough life.

I do not want to have my daughter becoming another cutter....



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 03:22 PM
link   
a reply to: Fowlerstoad

help her see a therapist so she can figure out better ways to manage her stress.

and for eff's sake, don't rub salt in her wounds. you're the grown-up here.



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 03:28 PM
link   
a reply to: Fowlerstoad

Find her a good counselor ASAP. Outside of the school and obviously one who specializes inn Self Inflicted Injury.

I'm not trying to be an alarmist - but, be alarmed.

If she's already to the point where 'more pain' (salt in her wounds) causes no reaction? She's already addicted to the dopamine rush, and sadly? After that? Once is never enough. Then it's deeper is never enough. Then, blood to the point of feeling dizzy isn't enough. Sometimes it's really tough not to go another step - even if you have no intention of committing suicide.

Does she also have any known eating disorders? It can be any of them but they more than not go hand in hand.

If she were my daughter I would take her to a church youth counselor. If they don’t give you something 'good' to fill back up with after letting all that go and dealing with it? It can come back many times worse.

And please - if the first thing a counselor says is ‘here, these pills will work?’ Go to another one.

And don’t put up with her saying no - that’s going to be a HUGE hurtle because most of the time what you’re going to hear is ‘there’s nothing wrong with me...’

Be prepared to have an in-house facility to take her to and sign her in if she refuses to go of her own accord.

I know that sounds drastic but she's already 'won' the - 'You tried to reprehend me and failed' part.' (Sorry) You can't let that happen again. Anything you tell her from this point on? You're going to have to follow through with.

It's going to be exhausting unless she gives in. Even then she'll need to be constantly monitored.

When you know it’s serious is when they’re hiding it. If she wasn’t I wouldn’t be as concerned maybe like others have said just a cry for attention and going through a phase. I do not believe at all that is the case with your daughter. Not at all.

Another thing even harder to do - but you might consider it?

Put her computer in a room where she can’t be alone with it.

Monitor her music. I’m sure you can figure out what I mean about that. If it’s all death doom and blood destruction? Dump that crap.

On the same side? If it’s all ‘I’m so sad and lonely and hate myself’ - well, you’ll know what to do also.

I’ve studied this subject for a very long time. So I’ll say again something you might not like.

You might need a counselor also.

Please - I’m just trying to cover all the bases and if there’s ANYTHING you want to know PM me or ask here. I’ve got nothing left to hide.

Just makes me wish I would have posted about this years ago.

Good luck and prayers for you and your family.



edit on 2230Saturday201713 by silo13 because: typo



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 03:31 PM
link   
a reply to: Fowlerstoad

One more thing.

Does she scratch designs?


'Scarification' - is not the same as SII - but can turn into an SSI if not monitored.

Best of luck to you and please let me know how it all turns out.

~ grace

My Child is hurting herself...


Breaking the cycle of self-harm is not easy.

Treatment can be an emotionally challenging time for your kid while she’s going through it.

It will help her if you let her know that you are there for her and provide her with empathy, caring and unconditional love and acceptance.



You look over at your lovely daughter and think to yourself how time flies. Gazing at her with love, you notice red marks and lines on her youthful arms. Immediate panic sets in; you reach over with shock and say, “What is this?!”

Your parental urgency sounds like terror, and your daughter pulls away quickly and rebuffs your concern. She retreats to her room, and you are left wondering where you went wrong and concerned that she’s in danger.

As much as it’s an unwanted membership, you’ve just joined with other parents who have children who cut. You may not even know that’s what you’ve exposed, but most likely it is. If your child has been acting more irritable, overwhelmed, and on edge, be aware of the signs of potential self-harm.
more here

I'm trying to weed out a few sites for you. Be very cautious of any site calling your daughter's self harm anything like 'self mutilation' and other equally derogatory names. That kind of labeling is not going to help.




edit on 5742Saturday201713 by silo13 because: added links



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 03:51 PM
link   
a reply to: fiverx313

True that, and thanks. Yeah, I am the grown up ... wow.



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 03:55 PM
link   
a reply to: silo13

Thank you so much for all that.

Okay, I am scared #less, as this does seem to run in my family, and I have obviously not been handling it very well constructively in any way so far.

I have not been a very good adult.

Denial is a very (unfortunately) powerful force.

I really appreciate your advice.

I will take it.

I am staying on this thread to read more, but I gotta withdraw a bit ... to think about all this, and figure out what to do next.

But truly, from the heart, thanks. thanks thanks thanks



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 03:58 PM
link   
a reply to: silo13

Suicide has nothing to do with Religion. Religion never saved anyone, how people have been swayed by social media however, does.



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 03:58 PM
link   

originally posted by: Fowlerstoad
a reply to: fiverx313

True that, and thanks. Yeah, I am the grown up ... wow.



if it's feasible you might consider talking to a counselor also, to learn how to deal with your daughter's issues. it's tough stuff to handle, and a professional can help you get past your own reactions, so you can help her more easily.

i went through a phase of scratching myself too, because i had a lot of anxiety, depression, and stress and didn't know how to handle it. if she's doing it in a place that's visible it's probably because she wants help but doesn't know how to get it or what she even needs. that's a good thing, that some part of her is reaching out. she's in over her head but you can help get her back on land.

/hug



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 04:01 PM
link   
a reply to: fiverx313

*hugs back*



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 04:32 PM
link   

originally posted by: Sapphire
a reply to: silo13

Suicide has nothing to do with Religion. Religion never saved anyone, how people have been swayed by social media however, does.


Sorry, you're wrong.

Religion/Christ saved me.

Can you too but I'm thinking you'd rather be willfully ignorant.

I'm sorry for that.



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 04:39 PM
link   
a reply to: silo13

hey i didn't willfully insult your belief like you did mine. You might want to reword how you talk to people based on their beliefs. I know how staunch Christians are, i was one a long time ago, which is why i'm not now. I respect that you believe in your system and would not willfully infringe on that, please respect mine.
edit on 25-11-2017 by Sapphire because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 04:59 PM
link   
a reply to: Sapphire


Religion never saved anyone,


Has nothing to do with being a Christian.

It's a pet peeve of mine when someone tells me something is a lie when I know it to be true.

Kind'a like someone who 'gaslights'.

As for the rest of your post? I didn't see you post anything about 'your belief system'.

I don't think believing in nothing counts as a belief system.

And when I was sorry for you, I meant it.



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 05:01 PM
link   
a reply to: silo13

I'm sorry your ignorance would go to such lengths as to insult my intelligence. If your trying to show your love for your belief to others here, you've failed.

It is you i am sorry for. Let's be adults and leave it at that shall we.



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 05:38 PM
link   
In the spirit of unification to some degree, I'd like to attempt some middle ground with a theme that is running through this thread. First silo thanks for your story and I am beyond saddened that a person had to experience what you did and I am also glad you found something to help you with it. I appreciate your notion about Christ and how religion can help and the absence of it can be a potential factor in some folks lives, particularly those who struggle, sometimes in extreme ways.

Religion...whew, I think it is/has been of good and bad and I personally think now-a-days it does more good. The middle ground, for me is to suggest that there is a spiritual vacuum in society today, and what is left is the status quo which imo has rotted and is filled with materialism, social status and consumerism and of course a somewhat poisonous environment via drugs, pollution and sensationalized information output. I feel that there is so much negativity around us that if one doesn't become proactive with something positive, they could feel empty,alone or tainted. When I say 'spiritual' I mean both formal and informal religions that include higher power, a force, the universe, nature, a deity or whatever one may find power in and relief from. Even meditation, discovering one's inner self via conscious effort to sort things out,is of benefit.

I am not saying that people who value nothing 'spiritual' or religious are bad or doomed, I just feel, from personal experience and observation, that incorporating some type of spiritual practice offers additional strength that some may need with their journey through life or to recover from such devastation, whether personal or external. Sure, I can call it a crutch even, but life is tough so imo, seeking some type of power source can be beneficial.

One thing that turns people off of this idea is when they are told they are wrong to think otherwise or if they would just do this thing they would be alright. It is better to live the example and maybe offer bits of advice and experience in a more passive way, or when asked ,as opposed to overly matter of fact-ish. I do understand the passion of faith and wanting to fix/convert others, but I personally frown upon that notion and would rather see it suggested as an option to consider instead of 'this is the only way.'

My thoughts on religion in school are this: there could be a building that within are separate rooms offering a variety of spiritual practices/themes. It would be voluntary only and could serve as a source of positivity and strength. Unfortunately, not everyone has good parents or a life that is more good than bad, and imo this is where a spiritual practice of some sort could be helpful.

Let me say to the non-spritual folks that they too of course can navigate through life just fine on their own accord and have plenty of love and positivity around them. I am not suggesting they must find god, I just wanted to throw my view on th8ings out there for consideration. I guess I am talking about bringing in some type of new and positive awareness into one's life and it doesn't have to be spiritual, for one can do volunteer work, creativity, garden, get a pet, etc...)all of which could be considered spiritual) but I do value some spiritual sustenance as part of our experience. I just think it an informal approach is just as valuable as a formal one

peace



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 08:18 PM
link   

originally posted by: Sapphire
a reply to: silo13

I'm sorry your ignorance would go to such lengths as to insult my intelligence. If your trying to show your love for your belief to others here, you've failed.

It is you i am sorry for. Let's be adults and leave it at that shall we.


Now I'm attacking you intelligence?

Whatever.

No, I've not failed. It's called the truth. And sometimes the truth hurts.

Sadly one day when you're on your knees procaliming Christ as Lord (when it's too late) you'll remember you had a chance.

That's what I'm sorry for.

It's called tough love.

Christian's are not 'welcome mats' to wipe your feet on, or mamby-pamby 'Oh, I better not ruffle any feathers.'

We're strong. And if you can't take tough love? I'm told by my belief system to 'dust off my feet' and leave you to your own devices.

So knock yourself out.

Done here.



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 08:29 PM
link   
a reply to: waftist

Fabulous and caring reply.

I'm looking forward to talking to you more in depth.

Between here and now?

At some point in life - we all need someone to tell us when we're wrong.

Getting drunk and driving? Wrong! Or you'll get slapped by the police with an over 10k fine.

Continuing in unprotected sex? Pretty sure you're going to get a STD or worse and that's gonna truly suck.

Lie to the government about your taxes? OUCH! You're in some big kimpshee. (spelling?)

The relevant point in all of this?

No one likes being told they're wrong but someone has to love them enough to do it.

I fail. I mess up. I say the wrong things when I should say the right - but the point is?

I don't mind standing up for what I know to be true - when others don't even know what they believe in, if anything.

Seriously.

Ask yourself (not you in particular but others)...

Who made me?

Why am I here?

Where do I go when I die.

I can answer all those questions with a secure answer built on solid ground.

I had it. I lost it. I turned to something else (ME - I CAN DO IT ON MY OWN) which nearly killed me.

Then I turned back - and - I'm not saying life is bliss?

But I know why I am here.

That I do not belong here.

That I have a reason for being.

I know where I am going when I leave here.

That's called emotional and spiritual security - no matter what this life throws at me now.

This is what I want kids who are SSI'ers and their parents to know.

There is HOPE!

I'll add more tomorrow. Time to feed the goats.


Thank you for your kind and well thought out response.

edit on 3729Saturday201713 by silo13 because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 08:33 PM
link   
a reply to: silo13

I was done with your reply hours ago.... Grow Up.



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 09:36 PM
link   
a reply to: silo13

No... You saved yourself. You're the one that did all the heavy lifting, don't given the credit anywhere but to the person who did the work.You. If you were really so into Christ's message you wouldn't be so in your face with all of the preaching and judgement towards anyone who doesn't agree with you or share your own version of faith.



posted on Nov, 25 2017 @ 10:15 PM
link   

originally posted by: Sapphire
a reply to: silo13

I was done with your reply hours ago.... Grow Up.


I 'grew up' when I was 4 and had the first taste of forced semen in my mouth.

And I can promise you this - Glory to Christ - I'll not be the one left without a chair when the music stops.

I can't say the same for you - but I pray that changes, I really really do.

edit on 1625Saturday201713 by silo13 because: (no reason given)



new topics

top topics



 
12
<< 2  3  4    6 >>

log in

join