Men Taking Classes to Unlearn Toxic Masculinity From Rape Crisis Center, Collective Action for Safe

a reply to: burdman30ott6

An accurate summation of my feeling on the matter as well.

I'm as gentle and polite as my environment allows me to be, at that particular moment. I'm also as violent, either physically or not, as my environment requires me to be at others.

Nurture allows the former, nature sometimes requires the latter. I'm fully capable of deciding which is appropriate. I got a master class in this. Called life.

a reply to: seagull

Dont get me wrong I was in my 20's and I still took the rest of the trip off to sit at camp and drink a beer since I got mine, I was beat and felt it for the rest of the week and then some.

a reply to: Irishhaf

I know the feeling!!

My mid to late twenties I worked on commercial fishing boats that long lined for halibut. Pacific Halibut can run upwards of 550-750 lbs (though fishermans tales told in bars tell of even bigger...--biggest one I ever witnessed was 500 lbs dressed, the head alone weighed almost 80 lbs--so it wouldn't surprise me if there were larger out there...), a day of gaffing those bad boys on board--well, thirty years later the days can get a bit stiff...

Biggest deer I ever bagged was a 200 lbs mule that I had to lug back to camp by my self. Anything bigger, I drafted help!!

There is nothing wrong with the realization that there are some things women can't do as well as men...the opposite is just as true.

I'm certainly not about to take a class that's going to tell me that I'm somehow evil for being larger and stronger than 99.99999% of women in this world. Just as 99.99999% of women are smarter than I...just a rough guesstimate, I certainly don't think that they're evil because they're smarter than I.

The class is for men who assault and rape women. Who have an attitude that they are entitled to do whatever they want to a woman. That attitude or programming is toxic and for those men that want to change, I say good on them.

By the way, women and men have equal smarts as per studies; why not research facts?

a reply to: InTheLight

You honestly think that men who, in your words, assault and rape women are going to go to a class to learn not to? Seriously?

Men who do that are, how shall I put this, irredeemable.

By the way, women and men have equal smarts as per studies; why not research facts?

How about the fact that that last part of my previous post was sarcasm?

The next person I treat as an inferior due solely to their gender will be the first. FYI.

originally posted by: seagull
a reply to: InTheLight

You honestly think that men who, in your words, assault and rape women are going to go to a class to learn not to? Seriously?

Men who do that are, how shall I put this, irredeemable.

By the way, women and men have equal smarts as per studies; why not research facts?

How about the fact that that last part of my previous post was sarcasm?

The next person I treat as an inferior due solely to their gender will be the first. FYI.

I can't read sarcasm online, sorry - face-to-face, yes.

Well obviously men are attending the classes or there would be no classes. So, it appears some some men have a desire to change or stop destructive behaviour.

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: seagull
a reply to: InTheLight

You honestly think that men who, in your words, assault and rape women are going to go to a class to learn not to? Seriously?

Men who do that are, how shall I put this, irredeemable.

By the way, women and men have equal smarts as per studies; why not research facts?

How about the fact that that last part of my previous post was sarcasm?

The next person I treat as an inferior due solely to their gender will be the first. FYI.

I can't read sarcasm online, sorry - face-to-face, yes.

Well obviously men are attending the classes or there would be no classes. So, it appears some some men have a desire to change or stop destructive behaviour.

Just wanted to share an interesting article with everyone.

Nobody knows what the other inmates have done, except for the people you’re in group therapy with. I met a few men in my groups who were very ashamed of what they’d done. But I also met lots of men who had no guilt about their offences whatsoever. And, probably, when they’re released, they’ll go out and do it again. It’s an attitude that, if I’m honest with you, I grew up seeing around me. I think some men like to boast and get away with things. It makes them feel like the big guy. And some men just think they’re superior to women, don’t they? They think women belong in the kitchen or in the bedroom. That’s pretty much the message I got from my father. And I suspect there´s countless men out there that feel the same way.

The thing that stops me from reoffending now is that I don’t want to be that person that hurts people anymore. I’ve done a lot of hurting people, and it doesn’t feel good. I’m a different person now.

www.telegraph.co.uk...

a reply to: Aazadan

and without any outside influence we have seen what happens to children , they become feral or incredibly under developed

what im saying is traditional gender roles have gotten us this far ,so why abandon them now because one generation of humanity demands it changes ?

originally posted by: sapien82
a reply to: Aazadan

and without any outside influence we have seen what happens to children , they become feral or incredibly under developed

what im saying is traditional gender roles have gotten us this far ,so why abandon them now because one generation of humanity demands it changes ?

Because women shouldn't be dependent on men.

a reply to: Aazadan

are they though ?

women seem to be pretty independent to me

Well at least from my own experience all the women in my life are pretty much independent , strong , have great character, intelligent, funny , a little bit crazy , a little bit silly , but still seem to be good role models.

What is it that women actually feel they are being held back by?

All the females I speak to on the day to day never mention "patriarchy, wage gap , etc etc!"

Most of the females I know hold better jobs than the men I know but that is my own personal experience of females.

originally posted by: sapien82
women seem to be pretty independent to me

Traditional gender roles means putting them in the home, unemployed, no potential sources of income, and totally dependent on the man of the house to keep them from being out on the streets.

It's the complete opposite from independence.

Want to know why so many marriages lasted back then? It's because women didn't have the leverage to leave a marriage they were unhappy with.

a reply to: Aazadan

THAT'S STUPID!
It's HER choice now, WE all get that.
MARRIAGES last from compromise and honesty, ALONE.
ABSOLUTES are for children,adapt and improvise or die, it's easy here...
WHAT is required ARE 1950S manners from all.
NOT social roles be forced upon them.
The KNUCKLE dragger says HELLO to the little old lady and opens her door ,NOT because it's a platitude of masculine expression.IT'S because THINGS suck and trying to BE nice, IS NOT a viable time to express feminism.
My wife WANTED to stay home, so I worked alone so she could work on HER art,I WISH I didn't have to do it EITHER.
If ONE thinks they are better its a sham.

originally posted by: cavtrooper7
a reply to: Aazadan

THAT'S STUPID!
It's HER choice now, WE all get that.
MARRIAGES last from compromise and honesty, ALONE.
ABSOLUTES are for children,adapt and improvise or die, it's easy here...
WHAT is required ARE 1950S manners from all.
NOT social roles be forced upon them.
The KNUCKLE dragger says HELLO to the little old lady and opens her door ,NOT because it's a platitude of masculine expression.IT'S because THINGS suck and trying to BE nice, IS NOT a viable time to express feminism. Every moment is right to express human rights.


Can't fix this #.

Wow, set in one's ways...#ing now awesome.

edit on 111CDT09America/Chicago00790930 by InTheLight because: (no reason given)

edit on 111CDT09America/Chicago00790930 by InTheLight because: (no reason given)

Even though we can't fix this sh**t within out society, we can still keep on keeping on, and get the message out.

Hey men, wanna dance and wanna do life right?

Stop draggin the line, and get into it. Look deeper.



Keep on draggin the lines here on forums and we all lose.

We are all holding our head high, I know I am.

No time for downers. No time left for you.

www.youtube.com...

No time man, get with it.

originally posted by: seasonal
It sounds like this is a group of guys who have no idea on how to treat a women. Consent? Violence? What the hell are these cats up to?.

your discomfort with men exploring those concepts suggests to me that you have a very black and white view of how those things work, and if something isn't A then it's always B and vice-versa.

a reply to: InTheLight

Some men have been taught that spreading their legs too far apart when they sit is toxic.

a reply to: ketsuko