Are Mites Having Sex On Your Face?

As the HORRORS abound, here comes MORE HORRORS

Demodex folliculorum



its is becoming apparent from random testing at about 100% of people have these critters living eating mating and dying on/in our faces.

“Within our samples, 100 percent of people over 18 years of age appear to host at least one Demodex species, suggesting that Demodex mites may be universal associates of adult humans.” Ubiquity and Diversity of Human-Associated Demodex Mites. August 27, 2014. PLoS ONE 9(8). Thoemmes MS, Fergus DJ, Urban J, Trautwein M, Dunn RR. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0106265

How do you feel about this ATS?
Creepy? Crawly?
I am optimistically horrified

a reply to: dashen


I feel like Borat's sister now.

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

showers cant wash off that feeling

a reply to: dashen

What's worse is why do they always look like the ugliest aliens in the galaxy?

It would not be so bad if they looked like Scarlett Johansson.

I wonder if there are transgender and gay mites? My face is LGBT friendly, lol.

BwaaaHaha, I used to pretend I was flicking eyebrow mites into my sisters food. She would straight up lose her s@!*.

That's why you don't wash your face with alcohol. Next thing you know you have thousands of drunk mites having unprotected sex on your face. They wake up the next morning and the male mites look at the females without makeup and notice the hundred baby mites. They move to the armpits to avoid child support and the mother is left scrounging around the mouth for whatever crumbs she can find.

Also it was mentioned on QI (a UK comedy quiz show), that they also defecate on your face

So when you drink to much you can literally say I am Sh1t faced

a reply to: dashen

Thanks for the nightmares! I'll go scrub my face with bleach now.

Best thread title ever.

a reply to: dashen

Aye, and they leave big pearl necklaces all over the shop, dirty beasts that they are.

Wonder if the Earth ponders conundrums such as, are those semi-intelligent Monkey things having sex on my face?

is washing your face enough to get rid of them though? is there some kind of satanic ritual to remove them?

originally posted by: KansasGirl
Best thread title ever.

i dont know how you got away with a one sentance reply. it wont even let me post if its one sentance.

a reply to: JourneymanWelder

Probably would not want to remove them as they might serve a symbiotic and/or biological purpose.

My face hosts the best mite orgies.

They're Yuge, really fantastic mite orgies.

Do you think any of those baby mites being born will grow up to be terrorists on my face? I might need to change to a deep pore concealer.

a reply to: dashen

Well, it's more that i am getting lately. Good luck to the little buggers.

Hell yes they are having sex on my face!

This ain't no sleeping face, this is a sex havin face.

Mike Nelson, Crow and Servo once tried to rid Mike of his eyelash mites (by having the nanites declare war on the eyelash mites), but Mike soon learns that eyelash mites are actually beneficial to us (a symbiotic relationship) in that they eat potentially harmful bacteria to help keep our eyes healthy.

The moral of the story is to not mess with your body's healthy balance of personal flora and fauna. We each have more stuff living on and in our bodies than there are people living on earth, and many of those things are necessary to keep us healthy.

don't check out you bed the Mattress is alive with mites.

that is unless you are like me and put a plastic cover over a new Mattress when you buy it.

if you travel a lot and stay in motels its a must have as this is one way bedbugs can infest your home.