The above photo more or less describes the trajectory of evolutionary dynamics. It reveals the essence of the process; but also conceals the dense yet
knowable logic within the biophysical system, itself embedded in an environment which it has evolved in a "structural determinism" with, so that
whatever happens out there comes 'in here', at various degrees of permeability.
Everything in actuality is perfectly expressed, and therefore, absolutely nothing lies outside the causal loops which merge the human being with other
human beings, which is to say: everything you've ever felt or thought derives from a probabilistic outcome of how your brain connected to a particular
environments objects. Your thinking arises
from this, like a spirit above the waters (literal waters) of your physical body (of which 98% of
which is made up of hydrogen bonds derived from liquid water).
Reality is unified, always, and therefore the things which we have longed believed can have very simple, entirely natural biosemiotic origins.
If you step into the realm of cause and effect, you can discover what reality truly is:
We need to pay attention to the absolute importance of early life, with a particular emphasis on the first 2 years of development which deal with the
affective-relational patterns of the interactions we engage in.
What sort of interactions are important to an infant, or a 1 year old, or a 2 year old? I'll use my self for an example, hoping, perhaps, that you can
discover explanation for some of your own problems, and how those problems were seeded early on in the first 2 years.
The first major "loop" in the fractality of human development occurs in the first 2 years, where brain development absorbs the biosemiotics rhythms of
self-other affective interactions. Here begins the 'feel' that reality takes on, which is really just a matter of threat, and how much the environment
threatens the organism. If no threat, then of course, the human being is as natural as everything else, and so flows with the flows of all the things
around it, completely unified, because of course, it is only feasible to experience reality without a sense of threat if the first 2 years of your
life occurred in such a way, and in such an environment, that your sense of self and sense of other became unified, and linked, so that a single
feeling - love - drew you in your cognitive relations; nothing else, and therefore, there existed no concern or fear about realities troublesome
'wrongness'. If there's wrongness, it's in us; and reflects our history. If you look deeper, you will find nothing but natures effortless simplicity
for an explanation for you feel the way you feel.
We could say that self-knowledge is essential to a realistic capacity to know reality at all. if you do not know yourself, your personality is more or
less an expression of what traumatic experiences and environmental relational affordances for growth have created. You are, in other words, the
'secretion' of the brains inherent fractal, symmetry seeking, dynamic, translating 'how you feel with others' (always this ecological gestalt as the
determinant) into ways, and waves, of being, in which you imagine in certain ways, and perform in certain ways, all because the snuggly looking, cute
baby on the outside, was really, on the inside, a profoundly ordered and self-ordering assemblage of 86 billion neurons responding to relational cues
in the parent and other peoples fact and voices that enlivened or disenlivened, or had a 'relaxing', or conversely, anxiety inducing, effect on the
mind-brains self-ordering process.
Early on, the fracticality of the brain mind establishes a series of patterns that are completely integrated with all the bodies other systems: and
indeed, since the bodies rhythms are evolutionarily older than the mind, or even affective emotions, affects and mind are 'entrained' to the dynamics
of the homeostatically self-organizing dynamics of the biophysics of energy-in-motion.
I'll use my self for an example of how meaning transforms itself into problematic 'untruths' - and therefore, decorrelated states - in a developing
mind. Hopefully, this example and its basis in a developmental timeline will give any interested readers an explanation for their particular sense of
self and identity.
Now, relationality goes far back, and each trauma in any persons history reaches back even further, so I can only begin with the immediacy of my
birth, and the process which determined a particular condition of it: that is, a C-section birth, which is now understood to be an early insult to the
developing system, as the mother's becteriome, present in the vagina, coats the newborn infant with the relevant external bacteria which its system
will need to know if it is to develop coherently. So why a C-section? At 8 years old, my mother was raped by a family member, and as Freud once said,
most neuroses (particularly in females) derive from early life sexual traumas.
Because rape induces anxiety, the females nervous system becomes "fixated" on the elements which are activated during the traumatizing act itself: the
vagina. Therefore, in giving birth to my sister, my mother's nervous system, naturally fearful of the birth process, preferentially activated the
muscles around the cervix which need to be relaxed - via oxytocin - but were instead being 'vigilantly guarded' i.e. via norepinephrine - because of
the relational fact that she was once raped by her elder cousin. It was like a clamp, and she was told she wouldn't dilate enough to give a natural
Because of this fact, my birth was suboptimal, and therefore, my developing body - and its immune system in particular - had to do a lot of catching
up. This too, of course, only works if you have a soft, kind and soothing environment. You don't want unexpected arousals; you want high-level
certainty, because your system is still working on developing itself, and therefore deprives consciousness of what it needs to 'feel' good. Feeling
bad, of course, is experienced as a burden to human beings in capitalist western societies. Mother's are no good at it; dads even worse. And to boot,
false explanations exist for its occurrence, so that a genuine "delusional scaffold" allows humans to systematically traumatize their children into
the adults currently controlling our societies.
In any case, at 1 years of age, my mothers grandmother died, and a few month later, her father suffered a major stroke: all anxiety inducing events
which made my mother 'borderline' in her ways of thinking and being. That is, she would flip out; be physically aggressive and verbally abusive to
those around her; and her children as well. These behaviors, of course, are perfectly "natural" for her. You need an environment for change to occur,
and she didn't have the environment that was needed to avoid traumatizing me.
At 18 months, I had a major asthma attack, which essentially reflects the way my immune system, already vulnerable, began attacking my lungs, because
the anxiety and over all chaos of my environment was dysregulating my body; and so, inducing 'systems errors' such as what occurs when one develops
edit on 14-9-2017 by Astrocyte because: (no reason given)