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If it aint fun quit ?

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posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 05:27 AM
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Dear all
If you even so much as read this let alone comment then I am grateful. Over the last few years I have become very unhappy with my job. It seems to stem from major changes in staff. Good people leaving and a change in upper management from somebody I admired & respected enormously to somebody with management experience but no experience at MD/CEO level. I receive a good salary the working hours are ok but I hate the pressure and the monotony of my role as it is. I cant just quit as I am 51, the main bread winner in the family and still have a sizeable mortgage.

We are a small team myself and another colleague running a sales office with a 3rd person running credit control and a 4th person running our warehouse/workshop. For two weeks in August this year I was left alone to run the office and support my colleague in our workshop which I did to the best of my ability or so I thought.

Last week fingers were pointed firmly at me for a process that should have been carried out during these two weeks in August leading to problems for an important customer. I think I have carried out this process just once way back in the past as it is normally carried out by my (control freak) colleague without exception so naturally it never occurred to me even once that it had not been completed before my colleague went on vacation. Clearly as a company we have an issue to resolve so that this does not happen again.

I was specifically sought out and blamed for the resulting problems. For me this was the final straw and I asked for a meeting with my MD. I poured my heart out and explained how unhappy I was at work and that this issue really topped it all off. His reaction was to reprimand me for the problem stating that yes this is a company process but ‘you’ did not carry it out so it is ‘your’ fault. He went on to say if your not happy then quit. He even started into my working hours because although I never leave work not completed I leave promptly at the end of my shift. I tried to defend myself as best I could but I could see he was now getting angry! Politely I stood up calling an end to the meeting.

Later in the day he asked me to speak with him again this time he was a different person telling me how important I am and coming across as much more empathetic but that it was still down to me as he put it ‘get involved’ and this will help but to come talk to him anytime.
Currently I am left confused & disappointed, were his reactions in the first meeting his true feelings or were they the softer touchy feely guy in the second meeting. Lastly not that I was expecting anything but I hoped at least the company would listen and offer to help in some way. Perhaps Im just an over sensitive whining so & so.




posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 05:58 AM
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edit on 9/14/17 by Gothmog because: dont give advice..



posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 06:12 AM
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a reply to: macpdm

Hi.Im sorry you feel this way about a job you once liked.Friends moving on to other jobs and new people coming in....it makes it hard to show up for work.Ive had jobs where it was FUN,then people would leave(or get fired).

To answer your question,I think the guy maybe got yelled at by the higher-ups and/or client and he came across kinda mean towards you.Maybe ??And then he had time to think about how you were feeling about work and could relate.I don't think he or your company would like to lose you.You sound like a trusted and valued employee.I don't even know ya,and I would hire ya(I'm unemployed by the way and its verrrrry boorrrring).

I really can't advise you on whether to stay or go.Thats up to you.Maybe you're just having a rough patch and things will hopefully smooth out for you and everyone at work.And I hope you find contentment in whatever you choose to do.

Best wishes.Have a nice and productive day.
:



posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 06:33 AM
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a reply to: macpdm

The above poster said what I could not formulate so well but I think he may be closer to the mark than I could ever have been. If your MD/Manager is worth his salt, he should see your out-pouring as genuine and see that you at least tried. # happens sometimes and it isn't always in our control. Judging by your age I'm guessing you've been in that company quite a while doing your job just fine. I know one thing, a good employee is not always the youngest, loudest go-getter on the block although management (in various sectors) often seems to appreciate that approach, until it's too late.

I wish you much luck and please, DON'T QUIT!



posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 07:01 AM
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originally posted by: blackbeltjones
a reply to: macpdm

Hi.Im sorry you feel this way about a job you once liked.Friends moving on to other jobs and new people coming in....it makes it hard to show up for work.Ive had jobs where it was FUN,then people would leave(or get fired).

To answer your question,I think the guy maybe got yelled at by the higher-ups and/or client and he came across kinda mean towards you.Maybe ??And then he had time to think about how you were feeling about work and could relate.I don't think he or your company would like to lose you.You sound like a trusted and valued employee.I don't even know ya,and I would hire ya(I'm unemployed by the way and its verrrrry boorrrring).

I really can't advise you on whether to stay or go.Thats up to you.Maybe you're just having a rough patch and things will hopefully smooth out for you and everyone at work.And I hope you find contentment in whatever you choose to do.

Best wishes.Have a nice and productive day.
:


Thanks man I really appreciate you taking time out to write this. He has nobody directly above him to actually yell at him but I do get your point and you may well be right.



posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 07:02 AM
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originally posted by: LightSpeedDriver
a reply to: macpdm

The above poster said what I could not formulate so well but I think he may be closer to the mark than I could ever have been. If your MD/Manager is worth his salt, he should see your out-pouring as genuine and see that you at least tried. # happens sometimes and it isn't always in our control. Judging by your age I'm guessing you've been in that company quite a while doing your job just fine. I know one thing, a good employee is not always the youngest, loudest go-getter on the block although management (in various sectors) often seems to appreciate that approach, until it's too late.

I wish you much luck and please, DON'T QUIT!


Again really appreciate the reply I cant see myself quitting and putting my family on the street.



posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 09:24 AM
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a reply to: macpdm

The thing about work is that mistakes do happen because we are human.

Here is my take. See if you can hang where you are - you are valuable or they would have fired you over the mistake.

Proactively, without assigning blame, you might offer a suggestion to your manager to prevent this mistake from happening again for anyone.

If the person in charge of it normally is out, then they could be responsible for informing the fill- in cross-trained person that it needs to be done, which would allow that person who doesn't normally do it to ask questions and be sure they understand the expectations around it.

And/or they could put a general "checklist" on these kinds of processes so that if someone is out suddenly for illness or whatever, the cross trained person can see where they are at with everything and jump in more quickly.

Cross training is great but if you don't use it you lose it. So another possibility is to have people who could be put in charge of someone else's primary job do a regular refresher of the unfamiliar processes.

The buck should really stop at management once a problem has been discovered. The manager is equally responsible if you, the person left in charge, was not properly trained or given information needed to succeed.

But never tel a manager that! Lol! Instead, say you've been thinking a lot about how to fix this so it won't happen again, offer solutions for him to consider if warranted, or at least explain the proactive steps you will take for yourself to prevent it happening. Managers like that.

You've been offered an olive branch. Take it and see if you can adjust to the new personnel dynamics.

Remember that anywhere you work Something will happen at some point, so the grass may not be greener. Commit yourself to making this job as positive an experience for yourself as possible.

You can still check out other options if you like, but just quitting is generally an emotional reaction rather than a rational one. If you still need to leave, plan it carefully for the sake of your family.

Whatever you choose, give it your best!




posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 09:53 AM
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originally posted by: macpdm
Dear all
If you even so much as read this let alone comment then I am grateful. Over the last few years I have become very unhappy with my job. It seems to stem from major changes in staff. Good people leaving and a change in upper management from somebody I admired & respected enormously to somebody with management experience but no experience at MD/CEO level. I receive a good salary the working hours are ok but I hate the pressure and the monotony of my role as it is. I cant just quit as I am 51, the main bread winner in the family and still have a sizeable mortgage.

We are a small team myself and another colleague running a sales office with a 3rd person running credit control and a 4th person running our warehouse/workshop. For two weeks in August this year I was left alone to run the office and support my colleague in our workshop which I did to the best of my ability or so I thought.

Last week fingers were pointed firmly at me for a process that should have been carried out during these two weeks in August leading to problems for an important customer. I think I have carried out this process just once way back in the past as it is normally carried out by my (control freak) colleague without exception so naturally it never occurred to me even once that it had not been completed before my colleague went on vacation. Clearly as a company we have an issue to resolve so that this does not happen again.

I was specifically sought out and blamed for the resulting problems. For me this was the final straw and I asked for a meeting with my MD. I poured my heart out and explained how unhappy I was at work and that this issue really topped it all off. His reaction was to reprimand me for the problem stating that yes this is a company process but ‘you’ did not carry it out so it is ‘your’ fault. He went on to say if your not happy then quit. He even started into my working hours because although I never leave work not completed I leave promptly at the end of my shift. I tried to defend myself as best I could but I could see he was now getting angry! Politely I stood up calling an end to the meeting.

Later in the day he asked me to speak with him again this time he was a different person telling me how important I am and coming across as much more empathetic but that it was still down to me as he put it ‘get involved’ and this will help but to come talk to him anytime.
Currently I am left confused & disappointed, were his reactions in the first meeting his true feelings or were they the softer touchy feely guy in the second meeting. Lastly not that I was expecting anything but I hoped at least the company would listen and offer to help in some way. Perhaps Im just an over sensitive whining so & so.


Some of what you explain is your age showing in agitation. (Im older that you). "Pooring your heart out" was prob. not the best thing to do. Walk the line at your job...hold your cards always close to your chest..you need that job. They will turn on you as fast as a complaint comes along so it appears to the offended customer, client, mgr or boss...that they are taking care of it.

Believe me...you'll go down before they do...at great cost to you and your job. You also should only have to defend yourself so much....realize there is a time to speak, a time to explain...and when not to....and just to keep quite.

Been there once or twice myself...thats how I know. Good luck to you.......

edit on 14-9-2017 by mysterioustranger because: splchk



posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 10:27 AM
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If it were me, and I was seriously thinking of quitting, but had a family to care for, I would just suck it up at the office, put on my happy face and act like it rolled right off of me and everything is just hunky-dory.

But during my downtime at work or at home, I'd be looking for a place that truly would appreciate me and my work.

OP, I really do feel ya. I've been at my job for 15 years and until about two years ago, was a single mom. So I understand not being able to wave your middle finger in the air and walk out, even though we want to do just that sometimes. But...even at its suckiest, I can go home in the evening and see my son's face and I know that that smile of his is worth taking whatever the job (and bosses) wants to dish out.

For Mother's Day last year, my son's class at school made a little book for their moms. My son had written inside that "My mom has a hard job that she doesn't like sometimes, but then she comes home and sees me, and it's okay." Made me cry so hard, as well as amazed me that my son is so perceptive (and only in 5th grade!) and understands so much.

Bottom line? If you gotta go, you gotta go. Just do it the right way, on the DL, so that you can simply slip from one job to the next without skipping a paycheck. Be smart.



posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 11:25 AM
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If it's an isolated case,and it's the 1st time you got chewed out no big deal,but if afterwards your scrutinized at everything you do,then I would start looking for a new job,I used to get called into the managers office on a weekly basis,I ended up as the General manager,then I quit,sometimes it's good to be in the spotlight,sometimes not



posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 11:54 AM
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a reply to: macpdm
He probably called the hr advisor and got advice between meetings.



posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 02:45 PM
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I am very humbled by the responses I have had thankyou one and all I am genuinely touched you all took the time to reply. Im just going to keep my head down and do my job properly and then how can they complain.

I will then try to make more of my free time for me and my family and enjoy it.



posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 07:01 PM
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originally posted by: macpdm
I am very humbled by the responses I have had thankyou one and all I am genuinely touched you all took the time to reply. Im just going to keep my head down and do my job properly and then how can they complain.

I will then try to make more of my free time for me and my family and enjoy it.


or perhaps - keep the job and start looking for a better fit.

I was taught always be looking for a job.

May take a while - but you'll be happier and your health will be better.



posted on Sep, 14 2017 @ 09:33 PM
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I'd be worried now.

If someone starts trying to record your work efforts ... go do something else.

What you should be doing is finding out who blamed you for not doing someone else's job and get that person fired for creating a hostile work environment.

I'd go tell your boss this same thing. Tell him that after observing his initial reaction you no longer have confidence in his leadership abilities. Go complain to his boss about it. Complain to your HR department. Make a big damn stink.

You know ... it's coming.



posted on Sep, 15 2017 @ 03:19 AM
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a reply to: AboveBoard

This is excellent advice!



posted on Sep, 15 2017 @ 07:08 AM
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Once again thanks all I may start looking about to see what else there is I think that is sound advice.

I do know who blamed me although im not convinced if that is the right word. This person is very definitely the teachers pet and has a bit of a history of passing info to the MD who is not present a lot of the time in the building. They are also of the 'live to work' variety and a complete control freak. Unfortunately although we are part of a large group we are quite autonomous in the UK with no actual HR dept and our MD has nobody to answer to in the UK.
edit on 15/9/17 by macpdm because: poor spelling







 
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