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It has happened. The unthinkable. The nightmare has begun.

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posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 10:40 AM
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This morning I was allowed an extra slice of cucumber on my bagel with low fat cream cheese.

I feel so full.



Don't know how I'll be able to finish off my cup of green tea.


And for those who are unaware, green tea is nature's way of saying, "I'd like to give you very uncomfortable diarrhea".




posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 10:46 AM
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a reply to: DBCowboy

How can you possibly fit a cucumber slice on those mini-bagels?



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 10:48 AM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: DBCowboy

How can you possibly fit a cucumber slice on those mini-bagels?



I call it a bagel.

Others may call it a large 4-cheese pizza.



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 10:50 AM
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originally posted by: DBCowboy
I call it a bagel.

Others may call it a large 4-cheese pizza.


You should have made it a veggie pie and thrown some bacon on there.



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 10:58 AM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

Bacon is my favorite vegetable.

It's also my favorite dessert, favorite salad, favorite Christmas tree ornament, favorite tooth paste, favorite ear ring, favorite contact lens, favorite hammock.



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 11:14 AM
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a reply to: DBCowboy

You left out lip balm and form of payment.



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 03:39 PM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: IAMTAT

I'm kinda disappointed about the weight loss, I wanted him to sit on my iPhone and turn it into an iPad.


Too bad for you.
DB was nice enough to sit on my 80 in. flat screen in order to turn it into an awesome curved screen.



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 04:37 PM
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a reply to: IAMTAT

I remember when I took him to KFC and they asked him what size bucket he wanted. He said, 'The one on the roof.'



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 04:43 PM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: IAMTAT

I remember when I took him to KFC and they asked him what size bucket he wanted. He said, 'The one on the roof.'



I took him there once too.
It was embarrassing.

He was licking the fingers of everyone in the place.



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 04:45 PM
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a reply to: IAMTAT

Did they also have to call in Popeye's for back up like what happened to me?






edit on 23-7-2017 by AugustusMasonicus because: Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 04:46 PM
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1 pound in two weeks ?
Someone is deep frying their cucumber slices.



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 04:49 PM
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a reply to: zazzafrazz

knowing him he's probably deep frying his water.



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 04:51 PM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

DB's the only person I know who re-fries his re-fried beans.



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 04:52 PM
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a reply to: IAMTAT

Threefried beans?



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 05:00 PM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: IAMTAT

Threefried beans?



He calls 'em 'Tri-Fries'...his own disgusting version of three-bean salad.



posted on Jul, 23 2017 @ 05:02 PM
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a reply to: IAMTAT

I think at this point in the diet he would eat fried cigarette butts.



posted on Jul, 24 2017 @ 09:49 AM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: IAMTAT

I remember when I took him to KFC and they asked him what size bucket he wanted. He said, 'The one on the roof.'



I remember that.
He was up there riding that huge bucket like Slim Pickens on an H Bomb.

Took hours...and a crane...to get him down.



posted on Jul, 24 2017 @ 10:19 AM
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originally posted by: IAMTAT
Took hours...and a crane...to get him down.


'A' crane. Too funny.




edit on 24-7-2017 by AugustusMasonicus because: networkdude has no beer but if he did he would drink it from a skull



posted on Jul, 24 2017 @ 10:24 AM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

It was just "a Crane".

It was Bob Crane.

He always had a way to calm me down.



posted on Jul, 24 2017 @ 10:30 AM
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originally posted by: DBCowboy
He always had a way to calm me down.


Yeah, he would do the choo-choo and airplane for you while feeding you sticks of butter. Sweet guy.



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