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I Support YOUR Dreams! (The Ultimate Secret Revealed)

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posted on Jun, 22 2017 @ 11:27 PM
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originally posted by: muzzleflash

originally posted by: Nothin
Thanks for this awesome thread Muz.
Amazing that you put 8-9 hours of loving work into it, and very interesting how it ties into your Café meeting.


Omg I was crying through over half of it.

I was experiencing these intense emotions and it was so dramatic and meaningful to write this.

I kept wiping my eyes I was so blown away.

So THANK YOU for recognizing that.
Thank you thank you thank you!!!


Thank-you for your generous nature. Remember that many non-members read these threads also, and so the appreciation goes way beyond the commentators, and stars 'n flags.

It takes wisdom to recognize, and share our blessings. You do a very excellent work of it.
And so your blessing: then becomes a blessing for others.
And so your wisdom: is put to a positive use for humanity.

Sorry, but sometimes it feels a bit syrupy to say such things.
It's not the syrup that is the most honest part, but the underlying energy and meaning.




posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 07:58 AM
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I'm flabbergasted. Thank you so much. The synchronicity in having this thread here today, written in the way it is, is just ridiculous. My eyes are watering, and I have goosebumps all over.



posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 12:02 PM
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originally posted by: TzarChasm


Ok I just had a chance to watch this video, and at first I thought "Shia? This'll be cringe worthy" and I also sorta expected it to be tongue in cheek or a joke but after watching and listening I actually think Shia was taking it really seriously. Which is hilarious because he's awkward and dorky, but really, I think he's giving a good message.

I'm not sure why he did the flex his muscles thing, but that is par for the course with him to do silly stuff like that. I laughed a lot.

I've heard a lot of very negative stories about him over the years but I wasn't there so it could be slanderous so I'll toss all of those stories to the side and appreciate his motivation and intentions with making that video.

He's a good kid, I'm glad he's on board.

And hey, he got to actually star in Indiana Jones one of the best film series out there, and I realize Shia criticized the film which is just fine and I respect his evaluation of his own work by suggesting they could have done much better. People who think everything they work on is perfect are the real fools in the end due to their arrogance. He gets a really bad rap and that might be mostly uncalled for. The media controls our perceptions of people and so had a hand in molding these negative views of him. I'll give him the benefit of the doubt.
edit on 6/23/2017 by muzzleflash because: (no reason given)



posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 12:43 PM
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originally posted by: Raven_Heart
I'm flabbergasted. Thank you so much. The synchronicity in having this thread here today, written in the way it is, is just ridiculous. My eyes are watering, and I have goosebumps all over.


I'm so thrilled to read your comment today saying this.

One of my goals when I write something even remotely like this is to embrace the unknown and just dive into it knowing that each piece of the puzzle will be handed to me at the exact right time in the most baffling ways. I have so much experience with this that I am very confident that it WILL happen as I progress, because it always does.

It's far more than simple serendipity and stumbling upon the synchronicity, I am actually actively attempting to prod the Universe into literally generating synchronized events. And somehow this works.

Maybe it's sorta like the famous 'double slit experiment' ? It's as if my mere active observation coupled with my sincere intentions and positive desires can actually affect these seemingly impossible to affect outside events. Outside in the sense that it "appears" to be occurring outside of my body and so therefore I shouldn't actually have any control over it or even influence it in such a way (if we are to believe what we are taught in school as we are brought up).

But somehow beyond all probability, exceeding even astronomical odds, my powerful desire to provoke and conduct an environment where synchronicity occurs more frequently and rapidly in ever more distinct and surprising ways actually works!

To me this is all a grand scientific experiment - I just wanna know that God (the Universal consciousness that pervades all things) is real and somehow is aware of me distinctly and will interact with and aid me. And this continuing flow of synchronization, these "wondrous signs from beyond", serve as compelling evidence that pushes me further and teaches me amazing new revelations at every step of the way, aiding me on my own Spiritual path to something much greater.

So when I write something like page 1 of this thread, my goal is to SHARE that mind blowing feeling with others. That I want to show them exactly what I saw and help them discover the feelings that I felt. To give them that sense of "No freaking way, how is this even possible?" type of exhilaration where they notice, if even subtly, that something here is breaking the accepted chances of probability.

And because I certainly have no control over the events outside of me in this Grand Universe, I can only have Faith and remain Hopeful that somehow the prime intelligence operating behind All things is conspiring in my favor, and that by following the path it sets out for me that I will miraculously match up perfectly with someone else and that my activity will startle and surprise them as a result of the synchronization effects that I'm trying to unravel.

This is all a very Spiritual thing, it springs forth out of consciousness and determination and the greatest Hope that somehow things will finally work out Right for once. That somehow something really Good and Meaningful and Valuable can happen for both myself and those whom I'm sharing this unbelievable experience we call "LIFE" with. I want to share that transcendent mystical experience and that eye-opening jaw-dropping mind-blowing revelation where you think for even a brief moment "OMG is GOD REAL???!!!".

It's like actively attempting to embrace the Divine, and in those tearful moments somehow deep deep down inside my Heart I just KNOW that the Divine embraces me back. There's nothing like it. It is simply one of the most meaningful experiences a human being can have. And I just gotta share it.

I might be a drop of water, but when I fall into this Ocean I Become the Ocean, I merge fully with it. I actually get to be the Ocean. It is more than a feeling, it's more than an idea, it's a logical fact and makes perfect mathematical sense. It's simple to understand and grasp. It's a higher understanding of the actual indisputable reality. It's like the creative side and the logical sides of our brain merge in such a cohesive way that you cannot even tell them apart anymore. It is Balance.

So the fact that you might have felt even the tiniest sliver of something like that as you read along means a lot to me. I wanted to share that exhilaration and bewilderment with you. I wanted to connect with you on the deepest metaphysical levels and Rejuvenate you with this nearly limitless energy I've seemingly accidentally tapped into. Why? Because it's Rejuvenating and Healing me too! It goes both ways.

I just wanted at least one person to feel the tiniest sliver of 1% of what I was going through. I wanted them to recognize their Power and Purpose along with me as I recognized mine. I wanted them to Love the Truth with me. To connect with me through "God", this Ocean that we are both part of.

I wanted to share Happiness with someone in this very Unhappy world. I just had to do it. I couldn't help it, everything pushed me to that conclusion and motivated that desire. I wanted to just BE ME. I wanted to show someone out there that since I get to be the ME I want to BE, than it only follows that YOU get to be the YOU that YOU want to BE. That the world just keeps getting better and our lives step up a whole notch as we share this experience together in a state of harmonic resonance through the Spiritual connections that bind us.

So thank you for being a part of this Dance with me. We are so Blessed!
edit on 6/23/2017 by muzzleflash because: (no reason given)



posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 03:59 PM
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a reply to: muzzleflash




Omg I was crying through over half of it. I was experiencing these intense emotions and it was so dramatic and meaningful to write this. I kept wiping my eyes I was so blown away. So THANK YOU for recognizing that. Thank you thank you thank you!!!



This is your quote, but is exactly what i want to say to you,
except change writing this to reading this.

i read this late last night, at the moment i really needed it.





I wanted to share Happiness with someone in this very Unhappy world.



you succeeded!




edit on 23-6-2017 by BugWhisperer because: (no reason given)



posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 04:52 PM
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a reply to: BugWhisperer

How wonderful!
It feels like giving a big giant huge Hug!!

Ahhhh, thank you.
I guess we both needed it huh?

Something I need to say again though is that, just like the poppy flowers, we will need more and more doses as the effects wear off. We can so easily fall back into our old habits of telling ourselves that we can't, or that we aren't good enough or lucky enough or that we are doomed.

So every day we must Remind ourselves. Everyday must be Remembrance Day. Good things always take time and hard work, and allowing our True Selves to Blossom is exceptional, it's greater than great. It will take our full undivided attention and focus and a lot of time to develop. Some days might be easy, but there will also be many hard days too.

We just gotta keep fighting for what matters to us. The rewards are more than worth it. We cannot let all of the negativity surrounding us to breach our defenses and overwhelm us. We must always actively participate in rising above it. It's ok if we make mistakes because we will learn better so we don't repeat them.

We have to keep telling ourselves positive things and believing in the Truth. We are under Grace and we are Blessed and we are going to make it and we are going to Succeed. We are going to finally achieve True Lasting Happiness.

Don't let it wear off, keep working on it. Keep moving forward.

I'm not just telling you or other people this, I'm telling myself it.
I've been through Hell, and I don't plan on ever returning. I'm escaping and I don't care how many demons are in my way I'll fight through every last one of them if I can't go around them. No more misery for me, I've been there and done that far more than I should have. I'm ready to take the next step.



posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 08:25 PM
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How would yall like me to do a short part 2 that came randomly to me today while I was trying to focus on like 5 other totally different projects which don't even relate to ATS. Since I wasn't able to make any progress on those other things and my mind kept coming back to this thread and it's topic - and I kept realizing all sorts of weird things - I should try to post up part 2.

I'm not sure how many posts it'll be, and I actually only have a little more than one hour to post it, but I'll see what I can do.

Part two is going to delve more into the esoteric side of the symbolism and will bring up discussion on various world theological concepts and WILL challenge your beliefs because these 'revelations' directly confront one of the most taboo aspects of all of this.

Plus I sorta wanna add in a little color to spice it up by adding in some pop culture.

What I want yall to do is to pay very close attention to the themes and phraseology I employed in part 1 and compare it to what I am gonna do in part 2....



posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 08:56 PM
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Not very long ago, somewhere very nearby...



within the



Which would be me, because I'm off the hook.
Anyhow, when I saw the Force Awaken today I was like
"Dude, that's a Peacock".



Right???
Well, that's the Eye on the Peacock's feather.

But what does it have to do with Fortuna Awakening?
Here I'll show you:

In the fictional universe of Star Wars, this is the symbol of "Phoenix Squadron"


and this is the symbol of the "Rebel Alliance"


So what am I saying here?
I am directly equating these themes/symbols.
Phoenix - Fortuna - Peacocks - Poppies - Gold - and the Force.

Ok I can teach some really fascinating esoteric stuff about these different concepts/symbols in totally different contexts with all sorts of other things but today I'll focus on this particular context that was manifest in part 1 of this thread.



posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 09:12 PM
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So this will be like a lesson on the


And I'm pretty sure that Fortuna is a psychic telekinetic Red head flaming hot chick depicted in Marvel Comics as



The Phoenix Force and of course she's wearing Red and Gold...
So what does this have to do with Peacocks you ask?
Well, everything...



And what does this have to do with the Holy Spirit and the Devil ?
I'm glad you asked because I'd like to share what I discovered...



This one is a Peacock and Dragon double helix forming a Caduceus


So this is something like...


Rising is a key concept here, because the Phoenix rises from the ashes of it's death as a new being or Spirit.
Now is the Phoenix the Devil ? There's all this fire and flames everywhere, what do you think? Most Christians will probably tell you YES, this IS the Devil because it is copying Jesus's Resurrection and all this other stuff.

But they also will tell you that Jesus merges with the Holy Spirit in the Trinity and that the Holy Spirit is what?
A Flaming Dove? Fire? YES!!

Ok but keep in mind that I'm doing the Peacock today not the Dove or the Crow or whatever other bird. "Birds" symbolically represent the "Higher Aspects of Spirit" in a generalized fashion, along with feathers etc.

But look at these graphics Christians created, it'll express the point clearly.







This stuff is Biblical but people are misunderstanding what's going on here. Imagine that the Tower of Babel style "separation of peoples and distortion of languages" actually happened and everyone was talking about the same thing but couldn't recognize it because well frankly most people are idiots and don't pay much attention and others get so focused on things and take things the wrong way etc etc. It's easy to misconstrue and misunderstand after all...

So this little tidbit will be our



And we're going to focus on things like this
(Notice the colors, red gold silver)...





posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 09:32 PM
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Ok so we have Lakshmi
The Hindu Goddess of Wealth, Health, Fortune, and Prosperity.
Her name actually means something like "Good Fortune".

And we have Sarasvati
The Goddess of Knowledge, Music, Arts, Wisdom, and Learning.
Her name means something like "Essence of One's Self".

Together with Parvati
The Goddess of Love and Devotion.

Together they form the Trinity of Shakti
which means "POWER" and she is, and I'm quoting directly here:

primordial cosmic energy and represents the dynamic forces that are thought to move through the entire universe


This is their concept of the Force - and it's literally equivalent with the Holy Spirit concept in our western ideologies. It's what gives the Jedi special powers in Star Wars, and it is:

Shakti is cosmic existence as well as liberation, its most significant form being the Kundalini Shakti, a mysterious psychospiritual force.


The Kundalini or "Coiling" Energy within you and I which is "Liberation".
This "Force" "Rises" and "Creates".

This is essentially the Phoenix.
But what about Peacocks? Well, that's simple...





The Hindu people have Peacocks everywhere around these 3 deities, which merge into 1 deity, in paintings/sculptures/etc.
(Along with Lions, Tigers, Elephants, Owls, Cows, and Swans)



posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 09:41 PM
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Here I'll do an off-shoot connection for a moment.



Ok this is Saint Lucy , she's revered by Catholics, Orthodox, Lutherans, and Anglicans. Legend is that either she tore her own eyes out or that they were cut out. Either way.

Now, she's the Patron of Writers. Some of her symbols are Lamps and Wreaths.
The Wreath is the Wheel of Fortune/Time/what have you. And of course the Lamp is Enlightenment.
Her name Lucy is from Lux meaning Light. Just like Lucifer is called Lucy because it means Light or Enlightenment.



Note the great Wheel behind her and the candles on her crown.
She's blind in many of these depictions, and she Guides the Blind with Grace.

Ok remember, Jedi's using the "Force" are led by it without seeing anything. Many of them are deprived of optical vision yet can achieve perfection. So this is telling us that by "Following the Guidance of the Spirit" we can find our way through even the Darkest and most Confusing of places. That is one of the main underlying messages here.



posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 09:56 PM
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Ok so now let's discuss


Melek Taus of the Yazidi.


translated in English as Peacock Angel, is one of the central figures of Yazidi religion. In Yazidi creation stories, God created the world and entrusted it to the care of seven Holy Beings, often known as Angels or heft sirr ('the Seven Mysteries'), preeminent of which is Tawûsê Melek, the Peacock Angel.[1]




The Peacock King / Angel ???

Ok now get this...


The Peacock is standing on the Wheel of Time/Fortune.
In fact, the Peacock might as well BE the Wheel...



So we're talking about the


And read this webpage on Melek Taus

Basically it IS the Devil but he "Redeemed himself and ROSE back up to Heaven".
The point is that the REAL DEVIL is inside each one of us - we make our OWN CHOICES to do wrong. Blaming it on this Spirit entity is totally bogus and irresponsible. We have to take responsibility for our actions and choices and thoughts.

That goes right back to the point of this thread - that people keep blaming everything else. They simply won't snap outta their negative thought processes and also do not take responsibility for that choice.

This thread is about taking Responsibility for Ourselves and saying "I AM going to BE POSITIVE".



That's another symbol of Melek Taus, and I'd like to point out that Melek is so closely related linguistically to Moloch (which is depicted as an Owl or Bull) that we can go ahead and say that they are as closely connected as Sarasvati, Parvati, and Lakshmi. They are all just shades of the same Source - the Cosmic Spirit or Oneness of Energy Universally.

Damn I'm outta time.
One last thing -




posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 10:01 PM
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And just cuz.... I'll discuss it later maybe...



AKA Lady Fortuna

A little artwork for yall....












and real quick I'll connect it with Thanksgiving (which I don't have time to explain currently) -



This is a Turkey + Peacock hybrid (LOL!)


Ok so think about what I've been talking about and ponder the depths of it all...


but MOST OF ALL REMEMBER TO



posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 10:52 PM
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All those pics were on my laptop and I can't use it now, I'm on my phone.

I need to add a lil more before I forget.

Ok so back to Saint Lucy, it's derived from the word Lux meaning Light (just as Lucifer is).

Well Lux is "Lucks" phonetically and Fortune is often called Luck.

These connections are everywhere in plain sight but everyone is blind. So open your Eye and use Lucy's Lamp.

And don't be afraid of Spirit. If you're a Christian and you Fear the Devil than you got it all wrong.



You are commanded not to Fear Evil. So what are you afraid of ? When God protects you, there is no Devil that can harm you.

This is about Faith and having consistency in ideology.

All of this stuff goes deep into history. None of these are random accidental coincidences. It coincides for reasons that make sense when you learn more about what's going on.

Rod and Staff, think of Egypt. Moses was an Egyptian. I'll talk about that later in another few threads. I know tons of crazy stuff about Egypt that you won't hear anywhere else...



posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 11:18 PM
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Ok back to the 3 Hindu Goddesses...

This is found all over the world in association with the Wheel. Like the 3 Fates are spinsters that spin the threads of our lives. The 3 Weird-Wyrd Sisters or Witches or whatever. They are closely aligned with the Furies or Kyries or what have you.

These merge into a greater entity like Hecate.

Ok about the Wheel...



This is a carving of the DharmaChakra. It means the Wheel of Law (Cosmic Law).

Buddha taught that this Wheel can guide you on the path to Nirvana or Heaven.

How's that work?? Simple.



It's the Steering Wheel of a Boat or Ship.
You're the Captain of your own Destiny. You Steer.

And yes a Steer is a cow but we'll get into the Golden Calf stuff later.

But about Gold, is money the root of all evil? No.
Is the love of money the root? Not exactly.

Well what is?
It's the wickedness in our own Heart. That's the root. We as individuals must reflect upon ourselves and inspect our very thoughts and ideas, our desires, and look at where we are steering ourselves.

If you have negative, selfish, or hateful goals you are on the path to your own personal Hell.

But if you are positive, selfless, and Loving? You're inevitably going to be climbing the stairway to Heaven.

This ain't a bunch of idealized fanciful mumbo jumbo, this is the physics of the Universe, the Dharma of the material world and it is Scientific. Modern science as an establishment just hasn't caught up yet, they are trapped in corporatism and focused on petty trivialities. They deny basic philosophy half the time.

It is critical that you use both sides of your brain in Balance. Logic must unify with Creativity. Spirit is a physical real thing, and so therefore the material world is composed entirely of Spirit.

Everything is Light. Matter is just Energy.
Everything vibrates on different frequencies. This is all about Harmonics. It's about the wave function and resonance.

There is only One thing, Spirit. That's all there is.
The whole Universe is an Ocean of Spirit and we are tiny drops in that vast endless Cosmic Ocean.

Once you understand this, you're ready to start figuring everything out around you and can finally get a small glimpse of how things really are in literal physical reality.



posted on Jun, 23 2017 @ 11:41 PM
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Most of ATS and the typical citizens on the street are stuck in a self defeating paradigm.

They worry condemn and fear the elites, the masons, their boss, their neighbors, hell even their own family or spouses.

This is irrational.
Don't worry so much.
There's nothing to fear except God who has all the power. Don't condemn others - Bless them. Hope for the best for everyone and have Faith in that.

This is the way.

These people live in a nightmare of ignorance. It is a dark dreary Hell. The death cults, the vampires and cannibals, the wars, the collapse and the NWO, the slavery and mind control, blah blah blah!!!

It's madness!!

Get your mind outta the gutter and focus on your Wheel. Worry about where you are going. Focus on YOUR Dreams and Happiness and help every poor Soul on the way. Love with all your Heart against this Darkness and pierce right through it as you sally forth like the CHAMPION YOU ARE!!!

All of that Negativity, the Darkness, the Void, it's not even real. It's a delusion, an ILLusion. It's mental illness to even think about hating the Darkness because now you become it. Stop expressing that kind of energetic fluctuation.

Love your Enemies and pretty soon you won't have any left. And that's a fact. Worry about You and those You can Help raise upwards.

I'm telling ya, the Univeral Consciousness will do big things when you show it you're getting serious. That's the Law. The Wheel. The Cycle. What goes around comes around.

It's all very very simple.



posted on Jun, 24 2017 @ 01:55 AM
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Omg I am tripping the # out right now....

I was actually, without fully realizing, communicating with a Peacock Spirit today. I just found the evidence!

Yes, I didn't actually look up the symbolism of the bird itself till now. I was reading about all of these different associations and just decided hey I'll type in peacock symbolism meaning.

I'll quote directly from this page on Peacock totem Spirit guides:::

"Peacock ... is a gorgeous messenger of dreaming all that you can be with no limits ... embracing infinite possibility.

Peacock will love to stroll along your side  and tell you the secrets of believing that anything you dream is possible."

And I'm like OMFG NO WAY ##!!!!
That's exactly what my threads about WTF
Hahahahah

Here's more

"With Peacock as your animal guide, he will tell you the power of believing that all things come in perfect timing, just trust in the process and allow the Universe to do it's magic working on your behalf."

I cannot believe the 100% SYNCHRONIZATION!!!

"Peacock brings the symbolic gifts of:   dreaming, prosperity"

"With Peacock as your spirit animal you will  love the high magic of conspiring with the Universe.   Communicating with the Universe from your heart space, letting your imagination create the perfect vision of what you want, and calling that which you desire into form.  These are the elements of infinite possibility, these are the energies that ignite you into action and set you on fire.  With Peacock energies you are unstoppable… albeit with overflowing grace and dignity.

Peacock wears a beautiful array of colors, feeling the freedom and delights of self expression, in the style of an Empress.  Peacock can guide you to express yourself with beautiful adornments of jewelry that reflect your personality and spirit. 

Peacock an Eloquent Symbol of Self Expression

As Peacock displays her ardor for luxuriating in the dance of self expression, it is in this dance  that Peacock opens up the 5th chakra, the chakra of communication.  Communicating what you think and feel in the most authentic and beautiful ways reflects the energy of the Peacock.  Communication with yourself is the most important communication you can have, this is where transformational conversations begin... with yourself.  Peacock symbolism exemplifies the idea that you must be willing to learn to be truthful and honest with yourself, as well as others in grace and dignity. 

The Peacocks Spiritual Essence of Positivity ...

You will find great power in focusing on the positive aspects of yourself, that which makes you indefinably unique and beautiful.  You will find deep wells of untapped inner power in letting go of negative commentary and conversations about yourself, your beliefs and expectations. This is the spiritual meaning that the Peacock spirit animal exudes and  conveys.  Have the conversations with yourself that are healing, speak the words to yourself that have the affirmative power of healing and transformation, this is the art of word magic.

Peacock Rocks the Power of the 5th Chakra...

Peacock is ever prosperous and has learned the path to prosperity and abundance.  With power emanating from the 5th Chakra, the Peacock teaches that your words have great influence over your prosperity, indeed having the power to create or repel prosperity.  Peacock power animal guides you to only speak the words of prosperity and possibility, and in doing so you begin to influence your world, the world around you and the outcomes you desire.  Chakra Animals

Peacock... Mystical Symbol of Conspiring with the Universe 
"


I'm in freakin tears.
This is impossible....
I'm actually in Communion with the Peacock....
This is one of the most solid and accurate connections yet!

That's from Universeofsymbolism.com 's article on Peacocks. You can verify it yourself.

I had NO IDEA until just now.
Holy ###



posted on Jun, 24 2017 @ 02:05 AM
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Right before I posted just a min ago, I've been reading about all sorts of interesting obscure history that I'll post about tomorrow.

I took notes and I remember things really well.

I had to post the quotes about Peacock symbolism because I just found it and its a complete confirmation for me that all of this IS REAL.

I cannot even fathom what is coming next...

And my God, ATS... You've missed out on most of the last 3 years of crazy mystical # that's been happening to me.

I'm so sorry I haven't been writing it in public. I've got tons of it stored. It's a whole book worth. My goal is to share it. And so much more is coming...



posted on Jun, 24 2017 @ 02:11 AM
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The only reason I brought up the Peacock had nothing to do with any of this then I discovered that it did afterwards.

I have an album from some guy that's over 6 years old but since I didn't have an album cover I put a picture of a Peacock feather for the cover. I must have put it there a few years ago.

I saw that this morning and thought, thats so freaking pretty. I wanna share that.

Then I started thinking and researching... I realized this is a Phoenix and this has a lot to do with my thread weird... Now Im shaking its become so unbelievably Surreal.

That is the Ultimate coincidence....



posted on Jun, 24 2017 @ 02:24 AM
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I'm supposed to sleep but I can't. Gotta get up in 4 hours....

This is what's been going on with me pretty regularly for the last 3 years. Stuff a lot like this but with totally different motifs and themes. I've gone through terabytes of realizations.

If I don't post it while I'm discovering it than it just sits there idly in text files.

I sent a lot of it to a very special person who did not respect it or me either. I really learned a hard lesson there, you have no idea. The hardest lesson of my entire life. It was horrible.

I shoulda been posting all of this here on ATS all along. That was a huge mistake. I wanted to share this stuff more than anything.

It has to be like 50 huge threads worth of arcane esoterica....

I don't even know how to post it.
I'll find a way...
I can do this.



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