a reply to: nickovthenorth
This is going to sound strange obviously but here is a distinct memory I have (surely anyone would say it was just a dream I had at one point and it's
entirely possible- I'm just convinced otherwise.)
So, me and my 3 siblings and what felt like many other members of my one day "family" (Yeah I knew this before my parents did apparently, they
insisted my little sister and I would have no more siblings) were "sitting" in these things that resembled uh those wooden displays they sell fruit in
on the streets. We weren't outside.... but we weren't really on anything i'd describe as earth either. We were somewhere beautiful, but we weren't
humans. We didn't have bodies. But I knew it was them and I knew that I loved them and that I was forever connected to them. We just didn't have
Someone asked me, (asked? As I recall it there was no talking, to describe the communication in this... memory? Dream? Would not make sense and I
wouldn't even know how to start to describe it) if I had made a decision..... I remember saying yes I made a decision. I remember "pointing" through
some kind of veil of smoke for lack of a better description. It was my parents, young, and dating. I remember they were at a restaurant and my soon to
be mom was smiling and crying and talking to my soon to be dad, and he looked scared but happy. He was crying too. (I found out when I was 17 that my
parents never intended to have me, I was a surprise) We can stay with them, if it's okay? Whatever or whoever was asking me for my decision asked
again if I was sure. I remember saying yes, there is so much love to be offered and taught, it must be them and no one else will do.
I got to watch them from this place for a while longer. Then everything went black. Then the first thing I remember after that is my 6th birthday and
finally telling my mom this story of how bad I wanted her and dad to be my parents, my family, and that I couldn't' wait to meet the rest of our
family. That's when she laughed at me and I'll never forget feeling so disrespected so young..... Did she think I was lying to her? I didn't know. But
in the end I was right, at least, about getting more siblings. I have normal memories after that til now.
Not sure if I'm just sick, had an active imagination, or both, or none- also not sure why I've never been able to remember any part of my life before
6 years old but there it is.
Sometimes I think we are somewhere, trying to find a place to be useful, and to be loved on this earth, or another.
Other times I revert to thinking we were a part of everything before, and we will be a part of everything after.
***I'm positive i have an active imagination now that I read that outloud, because of the ridiculous dreams I have- which is why this could have been
one, but something my whole life has felt strange and different about that memory than any of any of the wildest most lucid dreams I've ever had****
Life is strange like that.
edit on 5/2/2017 by NerdGoddess because: (no reason given)
edit on 5/2/2017 by NerdGoddess because: (no reason