I Had A Horrible Weekend

Hi, ATS,

I just need to vent a little bit. I had a really horrible weekend starting on Friday morning. Every single day was just awful. Friday my boss came in to work in an awful mood, basically trying to pick a fight with anyone for any reason. He succeeded, and managed to convince a manager to quit on the spot, and the manager promptly called the police, apparently for an incident that may or may not have been assault. This is only one of the horrible things on Friday.

Saturday morning, multiple employees expressed concern that their paychecks had bounced. This was only one of the horrible things that happened Saturday, but in this particular industry, bouncing payroll checks usually indicate the business will close within 3 months. This explained my boss's horrible mood.

By Sunday (today, yes, Easter), I slept through my alarm and got to work a whole hour late. My boss was really nice to me about it (and was really very nice Saturday as well, possibly because I knew about the police, or possibly because he felt guilty about yelling at me before he yelled at the manager, or possibly because my shell-shocked and standoffish mood has been obvious to the entire staff all weekend). Nevertheless, I was ready to cut my own arm off coyote ugly style to get out of there all day, and events continued to deteriorate. Halfway through the shift I realized through a series of egregious oversights, all customers who had come in today had been charged double what they should have been charged. Literally everyone had paid twice the correct amount of money. When I learned that, I was so jaded I didn't even know how to respond.

The very hardest part was at the end of my shift, when my boss asked me if everything went well, if I did well, if the business did well that day. I felt overwhelming pity at that point, and I still want to cry. He's going to lose his business. He had no idea about the mistake today or that it was probably a final nail in the coffin for the business. In that moment I went from absolute revulsion for the place to deep empathy and an overwhelming sense that he has no idea what's coming and it's going to hit him really hard when it does. He's a very nice person and a good boss (except he does have anger management issues, but nobody's perfect). He just didn't know the industry well enough to succeed. (The industry has a 50% failure rate in the first year and a 90% failure rate over 5 years.) I still kinda want to cry.

Sorry for being so vague, but I don't want any random people who stumble across this to identify me, my boss, the business, or anything specific.
Thanks for listening.

a reply to: anotheramethyst

Work-related stress can be really awful. Because it gets to you even on your own free time. Try to relax, and i hope this week will be better for you.

I think you boss actually had a worse weekend than you. It sucks seeing things unfold.

a reply to: rickymouse

Thanks so much!! And yes, my boss definitely had a worse weekend than me, though he has no idea yet how bad the repercussions will be. That's what's bothering me most. I'm really not worried about finding a new job, I'm much more worried about him realizing the business has basically just failed.

Just roll with it OP.

Bourbon helps.

I have a weekend on that level every 3 mos or so...

a reply to: cynicalheathen

OMG cynicalheathen, every 3 months??!! Maybe we should go to the temp agency together!!!! LOL!!

a reply to: anotheramethyst
It can be tough. I bet you have got a great resume though, a cheery and positive demeanor, and the drive to maintain success. You WILL pull through this no matter what happens. Good luck, hoping everything turns out better in the end.

originally posted by: anotheramethyst
a reply to: rickymouse

Thanks so much!! And yes, my boss definitely had a worse weekend than me, though he has no idea yet how bad the repercussions will be. That's what's bothering me most. I'm really not worried about finding a new job, I'm much more worried about him realizing the business has basically just failed.

It might not just be his business - your boss may have refinanced his house to put more money into the company to try to keep it afloat. He may lose that. He might not have told his wife about refinancing or the payroll issues -its all extra pressure that will be effecting his behaviour.
Real shame you had a crap week. Hope it gets better.

a reply to: anotheramethyst

The closest example I can relate to here is Stockholm Syndrome' which is when hostages to develop a psychological alliance with their captors as a survival strategy during captivity.

You're not a hostage or a captive, but if you read a bit deeper...but we don't often think about "econmic hostages" in the work place.

As the link below says...

"In the final analysis, emotionally bonding with an abuser is actually a strategy for survival for victims of abuse and intimidation. "

counsellingresource.com...

Your story relates...

"Friday my boss came in to work in an awful mood, basically trying to pick a fight with anyone for any reason. "

"Saturday morning, multiple employees expressed concern that their paychecks had bounced. "

"...and (he) was really very nice Saturday as well, possibly because I knew about the police, or possibly because he felt guilty about yelling at me before he yelled at the manager..."

and your bottom line is...

"He's a very nice person and a good boss (except he does have anger management issues, but nobody's perfect)."

So verbal violence, physical violence maybe, and bouncing paychecks and you say "...nobody's perfect..."?!

For the benefit of your own mental health you need to recognise this as, at least the start - if not an another episode in a long running saga - and move on. Your mistake is unfortunate, but that's all. You owe him nothing (there should have been a check and balance in place to prevent it). So just move on.

Otherwise you will eventually stagger from this job in a bad place to another job in just as bad a place, if not worse.

You sound very caring and empathetic. I hope you care as much or more about yourself.

You need to find a stable job in a stable business.

Hang in there and learn what you can from your boss' failure-sounds like you should have been running the business.

a reply to: anotheramethyst

Yikes, sounds bad all around! Sympathy for the boss aside, I'd recommend looking for other work, as soon as humanly possible. It seems like the place is going down fast, and you don't want to get caught in any legal flak, or just be jobless, when it finally happens. You have to take care of yourself and your family first. Plus, with police showing up for some possible assault, and the over=charging, that could cause someone to become irate, it isn't even a very safe place to be. Can be rough to change, but I think it's needed in this case.

Sorry to hear you had such a bad weekend. I hope the coming week is better for you.

Try to think of today as a fresh start.
Its hard to just forget things, but try to put last week behind you.
Stress can show itself in many ways. In your bosses case, he needs to find a better outlet for dealing with that emotion.
You cant pick fights with your employees. That was wrong ans childish on his part.

Perhaps you should begin looking for a new job.
Its always easier to find a job when you already have one, then to find one when your unemployed.
Hope things work out for you and this week makes up for last.

a reply to: anotheramethyst

I know how your boss feels. If you ever started a business it's insanely stressful. People who just work without any bottom line responsibilities simple do not understand what it takes to be successful. It's a completely different experience when it's your own capital on the line.

originally posted by: dfnj2015
a reply to: anotheramethyst

I know how your boss feels. If you ever started a business it's insanely stressful. People who just work without any bottom line responsibilities simple do not understand what it takes to be successful. It's a completely different experience when it's your own capital on the line.

This x100

I know the pain. the OP's boss will be gutted if his business fails. it seems the OP is a good employee and actually cares about the business' success.. a very rare trait indeed.

a reply to: anotheramethyst

Sounds like the double charging may have been intentional. Get an immediate $$ flow to avoid shutoffs and shutdowns collections etc. Refund the customers later... But that got the cash...

The clue is some bounced checks while taking in double from customers. It's just speculation... But it buys some time...

Sorry :/...good luck... MS

Sorry that you had such a bad weekend. Since there are more jobs out there for you, best of luck once you leave the failing company.

Awwww thanks everyone, all the responses have been thoughtful and I appreciate seeing all the different perspectives. I feel.much better now!!!

Don't worry, I started looking for another job last week, before this all started. Now I'm going to enjoy my day off!

a reply to: anotheramethyst

So basically, nothing bad happened to you resulting in a horrible weekend. Got it.