You heard of the Three Amigos, meet the Three Idiots...

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

Well i'd try my friend, but i'm afraid i'd more than likely squish my own phalanges instead

a reply to: scubagravy

DB squishes his phalanges every time he sits down. Makes you wonder what the hell he's doing...

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

Squishy Phalanges was my porn name.

You guys are still at it???

Holy Jokes, Batman!

Hey, why was Batman sad?



His trusted partner was caught Robin!!



Um. You know "Robin" "robbing" as in committing a crime...

Nothing?



I'll let you get back to your squishy phalanges then.



You boys sure know how to have a good time...
(Not being sarcastic AT ALL!)

a reply to: AboveBoard

Squishy Phalanges was also my stage name when I was a rodeo clown.

originally posted by: DBCowboy
a reply to: AboveBoard

Squishy Phalanges was also my stage name when I was a rodeo clown.

Hi everyone!
Just back from Martini night at the homeless shelter.
They were also doing a lovely chicken tikka masala.

a reply to: IAMTAT

It's always fun to have your driver go really slow and then you throw quarters out on the street.

Giving is so wonderful.

originally posted by: DBCowboy
a reply to: IAMTAT

It's always fun to have your driver go really slow and then you throw quarters out on the street.

Giving is so wonderful.

I've always foundf you get more bang for your buck throwing nickels.

a reply to: IAMTAT

If you just run them over, you can collect their bottles and cans and actually make money.

Plus it leaves more food for the quicker hobos and vagabonds.

originally posted by: DBCowboy
a reply to: IAMTAT

If you just run them over, you can collect their bottles and cans and actually make money.

Plus it leaves more food for the quicker hobos and vagabonds.

That's why I always take the Lincoln to the slums. More stopping power.

The Aston Martin is better for mowing down bag ladies.

originally posted by: IAMTAT
The Aston Martin is better for mowing down bag ladies.

My John Deere is better for mowing down everyone.

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: IAMTAT
The Aston Martin is better for mowing down bag ladies.

My John Deere is better for mowing down everyone.

I got a John Deere letter once.

originally posted by: IAMTAT
I got a John Deere letter once.

Me too!

Mine said:

Dear Sir,

Sadly, we cannot remove the amount of bones and flesh embedded in your riding mower's blade. Our suggestion is to limit the amount of people you traverse to a more manageable 5-6 per week. This will enable the material to remove itself during normal usage and not become so impacted.

Regards,
John Deere Customer Service

In Star Trek, tractor beams are made by John Deere.

originally posted by: DBCowboy

In Star Trek, tractor beams are made by John Deere.

And sadly run by Red Shirts who end up running themselves over.

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

My letter said,

Dear Sir,
We do not make tractor beams. You're an idiot.

Love,

Mom

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

Can you imagine Star Fleet Academy?

Getting a red shirt and then saying, "Aww crap".

originally posted by: DBCowboy
Can you imagine Star Fleet Academy?

Getting a red shirt and then saying, "Aww crap".

Would be like joining the Empire, getting a stormtrooper suit and asked to hit the bull's-eye to qualify.

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

I'm a graduate from Hogwarts.