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Schools offer ‘safe spaces’ to combat ‘toxic masculinity'--“Unlearning Toxic Masculinity”

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posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 01:21 PM
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originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight
a reply to: JD163

Well, these programs are offering a shortcut to those who want to change but don't know how to go about it.


People who are violent by nature usually have an impulse control issue,....telling him/her why such behaviour is unacceptable would be futile,...as I'm pretty sure that most parents would have taught their kids right from wrong,....and if they manage to reach collage with that same attitude,....repeating the lesson in a intellectual manner would do squat,...that person don't need course in civics,.....they need counseling or maybe even therapy


If the parents have been programmed into accepting toxic behaviours, then they will be teaching their children that it was acceptable for them to not deal with their anger, bullying or what have you, so it is perpetual.




posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 01:21 PM
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originally posted by: sputniksteve
a reply to: InTheLight

I meant our conversation. If you don't see it, that might be part of the problem.


There is no problem on my end.



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 01:27 PM
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a reply to: JAY1980

I believe these programs/workshops are not just for white men, but for any and all men that identify as exhibiting toxic behaviour...that is not working for them - is it working for you?

edit on 19-1-2017 by InTheLight because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 01:35 PM
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originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight
a reply to: JD163

Well, these programs are offering a shortcut to those who want to change but don't know how to go about it.


People who are violent by nature usually have an impulse control issue,....telling him/her why such behaviour is unacceptable would be futile,...as I'm pretty sure that most parents would have taught their kids right from wrong,....and if they manage to reach collage with that same attitude,....repeating the lesson in a intellectual manner would do squat,...that person don't need course in civics,.....they need counseling or maybe even therapy


If the parents have been programmed into accepting toxic behaviours, then they will be teaching their children that it was acceptable for them to not deal with their anger, bullying or what have you, so it is perpetual.


If that was the case would't such behaviour be ingrain into such person? And by the time they reach collage it would be too late for talking or to smack his/her bottom or sit in a time out corner? If parents fail to impart the acceptable code of conduct, society would step in in all sorts of manner,...starting from the playground,....don't give what you don't like. You somehow believe that such behaviour can be reasoned with....its not a understanding problem,...its a impulse control problem... by the time they hit collage,...the time for talk is long over



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 01:49 PM
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a reply to: JD163

That may be for some people, not for all, because some people learn what does and doesn't work for them in life and strive to make it better for themselves and the people around them, no matter what the majority say or do. But, I do agree that these toxic behaviours whether homegrown or newly reintroduced from immigrants needs to be dealt with starting in kindergarten.

Case in point, my niece teaches grade three and some immigrant boys from the middle east expect girls to pick up after them and when my niece demands they pick up after themselves in class they are confused and the father then visits her to challenge that demand.
edit on 19-1-2017 by InTheLight because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 01:58 PM
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originally posted by: InTheLight
a reply to: JD163

That may be for some people, not for all, because some people learn what does and doesn't work for them in life and strive to make it better for themselves and the people around them, no matter what the majority say or do. But, I do agree that these toxic behaviours whether homegrown or newly reintroduced from immigrants needs to be dealt with starting in kindergarten.


Thats a noble cause ...to strive to make things better for everyone, and I believe none would oppose that. What I'm concern about is swallowing hook, line and sinker about some false ideology, adopting a victimhood complex and insisting that whatever you disagree with must be changed to your liking....if would be nice if we lived in an ideal world,....but here in the real world we lock our doors instead of trying to teach robbers not to rob



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:03 PM
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a reply to: JD163

That is not what the colleges are offering, but becoming aware of toxic behaviours that we all do each day and making an effort to understand the human condition and address toxic and destructive behaviour. You are free to shut your door, lock it and never to look any further than that, but others strive to make this world a safer place for all to exist.
edit on 19-1-2017 by InTheLight because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:11 PM
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a reply to: InTheLight

Case in point, my niece teaches grade three and some immigrant boys from the middle east expect girls to pick up after them and when my niece demands they pick up after themselves in class they are confused and the father then visits her to challenge that demand.

That a case of cultural difference, and you know how it goes when you try to impose change especially on a different culture,...to you such behavior is vile and digesting, to them,....that's my way of life who are you to tell me that your culture is superior? ....Now, i'm not saying that i approve or condone it,....but i understand that such issues are sensitive and difficult to approach,.....What I'm advocating is instead of condemning and imposing,....first try to understand their mindset, and by living among us, show them, this is the American way without suggesting that it is the right or superior way of life.

It will take time, the civil rights movement wasn't won overnight,....
edit on 19-1-2017 by JD163 because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:13 PM
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originally posted by: JD163
a reply to: InTheLight

Case in point, my niece teaches grade three and some immigrant boys from the middle east expect girls to pick up after them and when my niece demands they pick up after themselves in class they are confused and the father then visits her to challenge that demand.

That a case of cultural difference, and you know how it goes when you try to impose change especially on a different culture,...to you such behavior is vile and digesting, to them,....that's my way of life who are you to tell me that your culture is superior? ....Now, i'm not saying that i approve or condone it,....but i understand that such issues are sensitive and difficult to approach,.....What I'm advocating is instead of condemning and imposing,....first try to understand their mindset, and by living among us, show them, this is the American way without suggesting that it the right or superior way of life.

It will take time, the civil rights movement wasn't won overnight,....


It is part and parcel of patriarchial toxicity here or there...girls and women are not servants to men.

From Brown University, last one:




They determined that risk-taking behaviors and lack of willingness to seek help were among the reasons for negative health outcomes that men experience (Baker et al., 2014). This lack of willingness to seek help is not limited to physical injury and illness. The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention reports that the suicide rate for men is about four times higher than it is for women (“Facts and Figures, date unknown). How men are socialized plays into the type of violence that exists in college communities. The harm and violence that men inflict is not strictly contained to the self-harm mentioned previously.


Men will often resort to violence to resolve conflict because anger is the only emotion that they have been socialized to express. Unfortunately, the way that young men are conditioned to view sex and their need to be dominant and have power over others also contribute to instances of sexual assault and other forms of interpersonal violence on college campuses.

Men don't have a lot of spaces to have open and honest conversations about the different things that they are dealing with, like how they grapple with emotions or deal with conflict. BWell is investing in creating safe spaces for men to unpack all of the things they have learned about masculinity and what it means to be a man. The goal is to help those socialized as men to unlearn some of the notions that have led to such profound harm being enacted toward others and toward themselves.


www.brown.edu... evention

My final word is that these workshops offer safe spaces for men who want to learn and change.
edit on 19-1-2017 by InTheLight because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:19 PM
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originally posted by: InTheLight
a reply to: JD163

That is not what the colleges are offering, but becoming aware of toxic behaviours that we all do each day and making an effort to understand the human condition and address toxic and destructive behaviour. You are free to shut your door, lock it and never to look any further than that, but others strive to make this world a safer place for all to exist.


I believe that you have the right intention,...just that i disagree with the method,....from experience I realized that being responsible for yourself, owned up to your actions and there is no need for justification to anyone, as you and you alone would bear the consequences.

Agree to disagree?



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:21 PM
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originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163
a reply to: InTheLight

Case in point, my niece teaches grade three and some immigrant boys from the middle east expect girls to pick up after them and when my niece demands they pick up after themselves in class they are confused and the father then visits her to challenge that demand.

That a case of cultural difference, and you know how it goes when you try to impose change especially on a different culture,...to you such behavior is vile and digesting, to them,....that's my way of life who are you to tell me that your culture is superior? ....Now, i'm not saying that i approve or condone it,....but i understand that such issues are sensitive and difficult to approach,.....What I'm advocating is instead of condemning and imposing,....first try to understand their mindset, and by living among us, show them, this is the American way without suggesting that it the right or superior way of life.

It will take time, the civil rights movement wasn't won overnight,....


It is part and parcel of patriarchial toxicity here or there...girls and women are not servants to men.


Yes I agree, the issue is how to make them understand that when it is prescribe in their religion? Telling them that their religion is false and they should convert? both you and I know how that would work out.



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:22 PM
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originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight
a reply to: JD163

That is not what the colleges are offering, but becoming aware of toxic behaviours that we all do each day and making an effort to understand the human condition and address toxic and destructive behaviour. You are free to shut your door, lock it and never to look any further than that, but others strive to make this world a safer place for all to exist.


I believe that you have the right intention,...just that i disagree with the method,....from experience I realized that being responsible for yourself, owned up to your actions and there is no need for justification to anyone, as you and you alone would bear the consequences.

Agree to disagree?


Sure, I agree to disagree...but you don't have to go it alone any more.



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:23 PM
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This all sounds like some kind of disclaimer dealing with any future sexual legal actions towards the school.



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:24 PM
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originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163
a reply to: InTheLight

Case in point, my niece teaches grade three and some immigrant boys from the middle east expect girls to pick up after them and when my niece demands they pick up after themselves in class they are confused and the father then visits her to challenge that demand.

That a case of cultural difference, and you know how it goes when you try to impose change especially on a different culture,...to you such behavior is vile and digesting, to them,....that's my way of life who are you to tell me that your culture is superior? ....Now, i'm not saying that i approve or condone it,....but i understand that such issues are sensitive and difficult to approach,.....What I'm advocating is instead of condemning and imposing,....first try to understand their mindset, and by living among us, show them, this is the American way without suggesting that it the right or superior way of life.

It will take time, the civil rights movement wasn't won overnight,....


It is part and parcel of patriarchial toxicity here or there...girls and women are not servants to men.


Yes I agree, the issue is how to make them understand that when it is prescribe in their religion? Telling them that their religion is false and they should convert? both you and I know how that would work out.


Yeah, the same way we did for the traditional/religious folk here in the West, over time...bringing the BS to the forefront, ending denial, not tolerating injustice...etc. I could go on and on.
edit on 19-1-2017 by InTheLight because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:30 PM
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originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163
a reply to: InTheLight

Case in point, my niece teaches grade three and some immigrant boys from the middle east expect girls to pick up after them and when my niece demands they pick up after themselves in class they are confused and the father then visits her to challenge that demand.

That a case of cultural difference, and you know how it goes when you try to impose change especially on a different culture,...to you such behavior is vile and digesting, to them,....that's my way of life who are you to tell me that your culture is superior? ....Now, i'm not saying that i approve or condone it,....but i understand that such issues are sensitive and difficult to approach,.....What I'm advocating is instead of condemning and imposing,....first try to understand their mindset, and by living among us, show them, this is the American way without suggesting that it the right or superior way of life.

It will take time, the civil rights movement wasn't won overnight,....


It is part and parcel of patriarchial toxicity here or there...girls and women are not servants to men.


Yes I agree, the issue is how to make them understand that when it is prescribe in their religion? Telling them that their religion is false and they should convert? both you and I know how that would work out.


Yeah, the same way it did for the traditional/religious folk here in the West, over time...bringing the BS to the forefront, ending denial, not tolerating injustice...etc. I could go on and on.


The same strategy might not be advisable, when dealing with a culture that is prone to attack and die for their believes, when even a drawing of their prophet is enough to incite them to murderous level,....reasoning and logic?

Unless you are willing to destroy the entire culture,...wipe out roughly 1.5 billion ppl,....when religion is involved, reason and logic does not matter....



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:30 PM
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originally posted by: TonyS
a reply to: seasonal

Have you ever been to College?

I have. Its a high pressure environment. You are under constant pressure to complete degree required courses with the best possible grade and........because of costs, you are under pressure to complete as many courses in the shortest possible time..........so you carry as heavy a course load as you can, and if possible you go to summer courses to get ahead of the time line. I graduated Magna cum Laud with a double major in 3 years.

No one with a brain is going to waste precious course hours on crap like this. Its entirely unrealistic.


Sure you did. That why you're so rigorous about proper spelling of your degree ranking. I'm sure it's an oversight that you didn't write magna cum laude. And of course no big deal not to use italics since it's, you know...in Latin.

But other than that point taken.

(I kid, of course).



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:32 PM
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originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163
a reply to: InTheLight

Case in point, my niece teaches grade three and some immigrant boys from the middle east expect girls to pick up after them and when my niece demands they pick up after themselves in class they are confused and the father then visits her to challenge that demand.

That a case of cultural difference, and you know how it goes when you try to impose change especially on a different culture,...to you such behavior is vile and digesting, to them,....that's my way of life who are you to tell me that your culture is superior? ....Now, i'm not saying that i approve or condone it,....but i understand that such issues are sensitive and difficult to approach,.....What I'm advocating is instead of condemning and imposing,....first try to understand their mindset, and by living among us, show them, this is the American way without suggesting that it the right or superior way of life.

It will take time, the civil rights movement wasn't won overnight,....


It is part and parcel of patriarchial toxicity here or there...girls and women are not servants to men.


Yes I agree, the issue is how to make them understand that when it is prescribe in their religion? Telling them that their religion is false and they should convert? both you and I know how that would work out.


Yeah, the same way it did for the traditional/religious folk here in the West, over time...bringing the BS to the forefront, ending denial, not tolerating injustice...etc. I could go on and on.


The same strategy might not be advisable, when dealing with a culture that is prone to attack and die for their believes, when even a drawing of their prophet is enough to incite them to murderous level,....reasoning and logic?

Unless you are willing to destroy the entire culture,...wipe out roughly 1.5 billion ppl,....when religion is involved, reason and logic does not matter....


It worked here in the West and just how long can they fight against our culture and beliefs here? The younger generations and subsequent generations will assimilate quickly.



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:39 PM
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originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163
a reply to: InTheLight

Case in point, my niece teaches grade three and some immigrant boys from the middle east expect girls to pick up after them and when my niece demands they pick up after themselves in class they are confused and the father then visits her to challenge that demand.

That a case of cultural difference, and you know how it goes when you try to impose change especially on a different culture,...to you such behavior is vile and digesting, to them,....that's my way of life who are you to tell me that your culture is superior? ....Now, i'm not saying that i approve or condone it,....but i understand that such issues are sensitive and difficult to approach,.....What I'm advocating is instead of condemning and imposing,....first try to understand their mindset, and by living among us, show them, this is the American way without suggesting that it the right or superior way of life.

It will take time, the civil rights movement wasn't won overnight,....


It is part and parcel of patriarchial toxicity here or there...girls and women are not servants to men.


Yes I agree, the issue is how to make them understand that when it is prescribe in their religion? Telling them that their religion is false and they should convert? both you and I know how that would work out.


Yeah, the same way it did for the traditional/religious folk here in the West, over time...bringing the BS to the forefront, ending denial, not tolerating injustice...etc. I could go on and on.


The same strategy might not be advisable, when dealing with a culture that is prone to attack and die for their believes, when even a drawing of their prophet is enough to incite them to murderous level,....reasoning and logic?

Unless you are willing to destroy the entire culture,...wipe out roughly 1.5 billion ppl,....when religion is involved, reason and logic does not matter....


It worked here in the West and just how long can they fight against our culture and beliefs here? The younger generations and subsequent generations will assimilate quickly.


When you only have a hammer, everything starts to look like a nail,....Islam is a totally different animal,....the prescribe punishment for Apostasy is death.....How long can they fight? since the time of Mohammad roughly since the mid 7th century

Those that grow up here would adopt and assimilate like you say,....its those back in the mid east that would be the issue



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:40 PM
link   

originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163
a reply to: InTheLight

Case in point, my niece teaches grade three and some immigrant boys from the middle east expect girls to pick up after them and when my niece demands they pick up after themselves in class they are confused and the father then visits her to challenge that demand.

That a case of cultural difference, and you know how it goes when you try to impose change especially on a different culture,...to you such behavior is vile and digesting, to them,....that's my way of life who are you to tell me that your culture is superior? ....Now, i'm not saying that i approve or condone it,....but i understand that such issues are sensitive and difficult to approach,.....What I'm advocating is instead of condemning and imposing,....first try to understand their mindset, and by living among us, show them, this is the American way without suggesting that it the right or superior way of life.

It will take time, the civil rights movement wasn't won overnight,....


It is part and parcel of patriarchial toxicity here or there...girls and women are not servants to men.


Yes I agree, the issue is how to make them understand that when it is prescribe in their religion? Telling them that their religion is false and they should convert? both you and I know how that would work out.


Yeah, the same way it did for the traditional/religious folk here in the West, over time...bringing the BS to the forefront, ending denial, not tolerating injustice...etc. I could go on and on.


The same strategy might not be advisable, when dealing with a culture that is prone to attack and die for their believes, when even a drawing of their prophet is enough to incite them to murderous level,....reasoning and logic?

Unless you are willing to destroy the entire culture,...wipe out roughly 1.5 billion ppl,....when religion is involved, reason and logic does not matter....


It worked here in the West and just how long can they fight against our culture and beliefs here? The younger generations and subsequent generations will assimilate quickly.


When you only have a hammer, everything starts to look like a nail,....Islam is a totally different animal,....the prescribe punishment for Apostasy is death.....How long can they fight? since the time of Mohammad roughly since the mid 7th century

Those that grow up here would adopt and assimilate like you say,....its those back in the mid east that would be the issue


The issue may also be those that come here as international students and think they can act as they please.



posted on Jan, 19 2017 @ 02:51 PM
link   

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163

originally posted by: InTheLight

originally posted by: JD163
a reply to: InTheLight

Case in point, my niece teaches grade three and some immigrant boys from the middle east expect girls to pick up after them and when my niece demands they pick up after themselves in class they are confused and the father then visits her to challenge that demand.

That a case of cultural difference, and you know how it goes when you try to impose change especially on a different culture,...to you such behavior is vile and digesting, to them,....that's my way of life who are you to tell me that your culture is superior? ....Now, i'm not saying that i approve or condone it,....but i understand that such issues are sensitive and difficult to approach,.....What I'm advocating is instead of condemning and imposing,....first try to understand their mindset, and by living among us, show them, this is the American way without suggesting that it the right or superior way of life.

It will take time, the civil rights movement wasn't won overnight,....


It is part and parcel of patriarchial toxicity here or there...girls and women are not servants to men.


Yes I agree, the issue is how to make them understand that when it is prescribe in their religion? Telling them that their religion is false and they should convert? both you and I know how that would work out.


Yeah, the same way it did for the traditional/religious folk here in the West, over time...bringing the BS to the forefront, ending denial, not tolerating injustice...etc. I could go on and on.


The same strategy might not be advisable, when dealing with a culture that is prone to attack and die for their believes, when even a drawing of their prophet is enough to incite them to murderous level,....reasoning and logic?

Unless you are willing to destroy the entire culture,...wipe out roughly 1.5 billion ppl,....when religion is involved, reason and logic does not matter....


It worked here in the West and just how long can they fight against our culture and beliefs here? The younger generations and subsequent generations will assimilate quickly.


When you only have a hammer, everything starts to look like a nail,....Islam is a totally different animal,....the prescribe punishment for Apostasy is death.....How long can they fight? since the time of Mohammad roughly since the mid 7th century

Those that grow up here would adopt and assimilate like you say,....its those back in the mid east that would be the issue


The issue may also be those that come here as international students and think they can act as they please.


Then those that do so would soon be invited to a nice long stay in a state pen,...courtesy of uncle sam




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