originally posted by: BestinShow
I don't think anyone is laughing...sympathizing maybe, but not laughing.
I've known you since 2008 on these boards, and gotta tell you man, you seem like you need counseling big time.
So you're going to insult, belittle, and denigrate me?
Counseling will do nothing except waste my time and give an opportunity for backstabbing liars (who know hardly anything about life or history or
science) to try and find a reason to either get me locked up again or force medications down my throat and ruin my brain and other organs and then
insult me with labels that society will always see on me everywhere I go.
And not only that, the only time I ever went to jail in my entire life (and then got put in a mental hospital) was when my therapist decided to cover
up her negligence and malpractice by inventing a string of lies about me (which I have evidence is not true). I told her "I should turn you into the
board and have them review your license" and then what happened? Handcuffs and false accusations that created the greatest most painful disaster in my
Maybe you need counseling, maybe you need medications, maybe you live in denial and cannot handle reality so fall back on all of these easy outs?
Me? I need people to treat me with respect and to recognize my dignity as a human being. I need a bank account loaded to the brim with money.
And especially what I need is for people to stop judging my character and psychology to the degree they feel the need to preface their insults and
personal attacks with lies like "no ones laughing at you" then proceed to make fun of me.
I definitely don't need people telling me what I need. I'm the judge of that, and I'm actually an open person that's honest about my problems and has
no problem admitting what I'm dealing with. I don't need people who know less than 1% of the content of the story of my life telling me what they
think's wrong with me or that they think someone who knows even less than they do, which is hardly anything at all, can somehow help me.
Why don't you just say "give up on your dreams, accept defeat, go take pills, and waste the rest of your life begging fake 'professional' people to
give you worthless attention and make irrational suggestions"?
Why can't I just need a hug and a friend? Why are you convinced that a corrupted institution full of people that only care about themselves and $$$
can help me at all? They have no interest in helping me, in fact their interest is to trap me into self-destruction and waste the best years of my
limited lifespan becoming dependent upon their system and their pills.
Don't you understand all their drugs destroy the human body? They destroy and deaden the mind. They don't help you face your problems constructively.
They don't provide you with income and affection.
You think I'm some sort of incompetent mentally challenged fool? Well I think you're a judgmental prejudiced and pretentious person that needs to get
a real education and read some books and think about things more deeply.
You thinking posting on the internet isn't helping me? Wrong. I just had a very therapeutic and satisfying moment making this post.
I'm the only one with the balls to make my life an open book, to show myself naked. My purpose was to teach others important lessons, to show them
what a real human being has to go through in a very difficult challenging life. I'm the counselor here, my expose will teach you more about yourself
and how to handle yourself than any 'fake professional' or bottle of pills ever will.
And besides, if you had bothered to read you'd notice that I consistently remind people that I had two panels of psychologists, therapists,
psychiatrists, social workers etc (24 'highly educated professionals), give me a month long evaluation while trapped in their insane asylum with truly
troubled and psychotic individuals who don't even know how to speak English properly half the time. I saw the reality of all of this, I saw what
really goes on in those places, I saw the abuse and threats and violence. I saw the gritty reality at the bottom.
If those individuals whom you would likely hold in high esteem due to their credentials and decades of experience cannot nail me with even one single
diagnosis, why cannot you accept that? After I got out I went back twice for further check ups and even met completely different people, speaking to
several on each visit - and they too agreed "he cannot be diagnosed".
I'll remind you what their assessment was - they said "He is misunderstood".
Why would they say that? Maybe it's because I'm a very complicated and highly educated person that needs 20 paragraphs to express one simple little
idea? Maybe I'm artistic and express myself in symbolic ways that will require you, the viewer, to dissect and analyze in depth by utilizing all of
your skills and talents to even begin to hypothesize what the hell I "might mean"? Maybe I'm way over your head with most of the stuff I might say? I
always tell everyone I'm willing to explain in depth what my riddles and statements actually mean - but no one ever bothers to ask me - they just
assume from a position of excessive ignorance and poor educational background. And yes and PhD doesn't quantify a good education, it's just an
opportunity to begin a good education, it doesn't guarantee you'll figure anything out, you gotta do the legwork yourself and almost everyone is too
lazy or ill-equipped to even get close to that.
They read tons of my threads and investigated my history here. Then I had to defend myself, defend the things I said on this forum to them. And I
succeeded explaining it. I had to take tons of exams of all types. I achieved absolute perfection from the moment I went into that facility to the
moment I walked out, at least in their eyes.
I was skilled enough to cover up my mistakes and to hide any flaws that I myself quietly recognized. Those flaws are what I'm working on right now
because I understand only I can handle them, no one else is going to be able to rationalize it all away and then turn around and walk off going back
to their life and think they gave me good advice. It's like a conflict of your own conscience. You will feel like you need to 'do something' after you
witnessed a train wreck. You essentially walked up to a mangled corpse and said "maybe you need to see a doctor?". Gimme a break, I need to see the
undertaker, let's be honest and real here.
Now, I'll boil all of that down into a simple straightforward explanation of what I actually need. Let's say I don't want to go get cataloged and
examined by a mortician? What could I possibly need?
Oh I know - I need to get LAID!
I need a hot chick to screw me till I'm better.
It's that simple. I cannot believe people are so lost in their illusions and delusions that they cannot see that simple one sentence prescription to
heal my wounds. I just need to get laid.
That was what was in my head the entire time all of this transpired. That's all it was. I wanted to bang some chicks. Because I'm not getting that it
turned into books worth of words that everyone is failing miserably at analyzing properly.
Thank God the actual 'professionals' everyone is so reliant upon actually understood that. Thank God most of them were geeks in school and didn't get
the hot chicks and so understood what the hell I'm going through here.
I just need a girlfriend.