posted on Dec, 2 2016 @ 09:13 AM
a reply to: dr1234
You have gotten some very good advice here and I hope you think long and hard about those words of wisdom. I really hope you can put your
defensiveness aside and think about what you
could have and should have done better. I'm going to speak to you as I would to my own son. It
may sound harsh, but it's said with love.
The bottom line is that YOU need to do better. YOU are the problem, not your girlfriend. My heart goes out to her.
Please don't whine about how cheating is so much worse than snooping. That's a copout and you know better. You do not know that your girlfriend is
cheating and offered no evidence that she was or is -- Even after snooping. But you do know that you were snooping, pretending to be her, and
invading her privacy -- and still found no evidence that she's cheating. You still have no reason to be suspicious of her; but you do know that she
cannot trust you.
And please don't whine that she should have no secrets from you and that you should know everything about her. You obviously don't feel she deserves
to know everything
about you, or you would have already told her what you've done... not telling us
what you've done to her and
continuing to talk about her behind her back. No secrets, right?
Think about this -- and I say this as gently and respectfully as I can: Are you judging her
by your own behavior and standards???
Your best bet is to do what you should have done to begin with if you had any doubts/suspicions: Be a man -- not a sneaky shady little boy -- and
actually talk to her! But now, instead of confronting her, you need to confess your own sins and insecurities and beg her forgiveness. If she
forgives you, then you're a damn lucky man, and you can build your future relationship on a firmer foundation. If she doesn't forgive you, then take
your lumps and learn your lesson, so you can build future relationships on a firmer foundation.