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I like to be in control

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posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 09:43 AM
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Many things I have the ability to control, I like it when I have a say in the outcome; When I do not, the results are often something I prefer were different.

Control is an issue we all have to deal with throughout our day.

The person driving next to you talking or texting has your life in their hands; no control there.

The person making your food for you while dripping snot everywhere; no control there.

The person answering the 911 calls that is watching youtube videos; no control there.

For the better part of 25 years I have driven myself; only 3 exceptions, My Mom, My Dad and My Wife and only when I was incapacitated.

Before that, I used to have to get on a bus to go to school and to get home, that was a forced issue and rarely did I ever enjoy that ride.

So, recently I decided to do something in my control and gave up control, on purpose; I got on a public transportation vehicle and took a ride.

I did not have to do this, but I wanted to, I wanted to see what it was like to deal with a lack of control, to confront my worst phobias; claustrophobia, agoraphobia and mysophobia, all of which have been a paralyzing aspect of my behaviors and OCD.

I had nowhere to go in particular, I just gave myself a specific amount of time to contend and to be an observer of human behavior along with making mental notes about my own responses to the endeavor. How did I do? I survived. It was oh so difficult though.

Trying to maintain what little control I did have was exhausting. The bus was filthy. The people were on top of me the whole time. The driver was horrible. For 2 hours I put myself through HELL to prove a point...I like to be in control!




posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 11:13 AM
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a reply to: searcherfortruth

Great to see You faced Your fears just and let it ride! I like being in control of My own life as well, but do hand it over when the need arises. I don't like it, but it is what it is! I Know some who are total control freaks! There is a difference, I think anyway.

No matter how one goes about their day, it's all about choices. Control of those choices is ours, none the less. Whether you take a ride somewhere or give it, it is still YOU controlling that. Does that make sense?

Kind of like what Geddy Lee from Rush says, "If You choose not to decide, You still have made a choice!"
Best of Good luck To You and Your phobias for the future.

And also remember as the Good Man Bill Hicks said, It's just a ride. It's about choices, Control somewhat...
In case You have not seen this yet, I'll post
it for You, and for those who have not seen it.



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 11:25 AM
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a reply to: SyxPak

Even when we have no control over others we still have control over our own reaction to the lack of control, right?



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 11:28 AM
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a reply to: searcherfortruth

What about falling in love?

S+F



edit on 29-11-2016 by midicon because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 11:28 AM
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Dp



edit on 29-11-2016 by midicon because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 11:37 AM
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I wanted to see what it was like to deal with a lack of control, to confront my worst phobias; claustrophobia, agoraphobia and mysophobia, all of which have been a paralyzing aspect of my behaviors and OCD.
~searcherfortruth

Claustrophobia, agoraphobia, mysophobia.... OCD.

So where did these labels come from? Self analysis or from some doctor?

Claustrophobia... scared to leave the house... aka back in the womb complex separation anxiety undealt with. Are you in love with your mother and clingy or feel she's the only one that gives you control?

Agoraphobia... fear of outside and wide open spaces... playing in your own yard of comfort people rarely grow out of such things... nothing ventured nothing gained right?

Mysosophobia... inside your whole body? Everything you fear right now outside of your body? Same thing.
So this fear is stupid internal afraid of the external.

So last one easy to dismiss... we are all food chain from smallest to largest and well right back around again... the smallest germ can nom nom the largest nom nom and round and round no biggie.

OCD... obsession clinging grasping, well what is the desire for such a thing of clinging and grasping is it to life or objects you which to maintain or keep under your control?

So if you desire to be in controll of yourself... and yet mad you can't control all others? Then shoe on the other foot... maybe they don't want to be controlled by you either.

So respect is given automatically for everyone's personal space and free will and right to exist and be happy with what and whomever they want in the life and that the existence of both in one's life is mutual and one of consent. Obviously in honesty and no ulterior motives... that are like a secret surprise party... nonsense like that occurs anyway called the unexpected... why? Because of cause and effect.

Causation is not direct correlation except in a scientific field of agreement that has been agreed on in relativity and tested over and over and over to be a consentual reality.

If you want freedom and independence from such things? Then no consent to what you do not want in your life... of course what is holding anyone back is always themselves their untruths their dishonesty...

Their chosen labels.

Of course if someone was not consenting to some contact that occured out of their control then it would be abuse an extreme so consent is the balance.

As children as you pointed out none zip squat jack none... the illusion of choice is there but it really isnt it's one or the other... of course there is creation and destruction in such ideas of nonsense and control... so what happens in such ignorance of greed and hate? Round and Round and Round And Round.

Someone trying to play or pretend to be a god but really their own devil giving themselves some permission to go round and round and round no consent then GTFO step out of such bubbles that to not give equal consent to be in ones life...

Ideas of ownership of another is wishing to control another which comes right back around to the very beginning of this.

Which means people believing anything not real grasping at any label to define themselves that another defines for them? Is not an adult they are a child and still looking to either take control as a parent or take control as an adult.

It is very unbecoming as adults to try to control other adults like children or subject them as some sort of slave life is already imprisioned in form so enjoy life creating form helps enjoy life imprisioning others into some system of life in some form or fashion is the potters wheel of formation the name or label the attachment.

So do you want to be any of those labels and nonsense others has given? Constent to them or do not... Man? Woman? Child? Gay? Straight? Who cares?

None of them mean a damned thing in the ultimate sense... if it means something to you then we! awesome if not then mind your own business... cant mind ones own business and getting into others business without consent has all sorts of excuses attached... it is a sign of others trying to possess and have no self possession... someone with no self possession is a slave and wishes to chain themselves to others not oneself the same as labels.

This sort of nonsense is a the life trope the choice to be something someone is not a life or some form of life and in that formation people try to make binding contracts to hold and bind eachother in bondage and fear of losing something istead of the opposite which is gaining everything.

It is very infantile to try to bond any adult to anything body, speech, or mind that they do not consent too.

Self possession means you can control yourself but you have no control over your desires which means other possession or slavery... no one wants to be anyone's damned slave.

So enslaving oneself to these labels? Eh personal choice and what isnt personal choice? Where is the consent? Internal or external? In the tree out of the tree in the womb out of the womb?

Same damned thing. No becoming this now becoming that moment by moment by moment...

Like no thanks I dont want to play labels with you go have fun and bother someone else.



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 11:45 AM
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a reply to: searcherfortruth

That is correct! What I don't like is when I know I am right, no gettin around it, and the other person will not budge at all in their thoughts on it! I can PROVE something beyond a shadow of a doubt, and they will still NOT give at all! THey say "Oh come on now don't be so bullheaded!" And I'm thinking, "Gee what did You just say? Why don't You do the same and not be so bullheaded!?!" But I spose that get's into hypocritisism and all that so that's for another time!

Have a good one! Syx...



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 12:15 PM
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a reply to: BigBrotherDarkness

And yet you felt the need to insert your opinion here? Lack of control is evident. Have a great day!



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 12:19 PM
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a reply to: SyxPak

Obstinate behavior is boorish is it not? Stubborn people really have the worst demeanor, they believe if they run their head into a brick wall over and over again, eventually the wall will crack when in fact it is their own head that cracks eventually!

At some point you just have to accept the fact that they are clueless.



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 01:04 PM
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a reply to: searcherfortruth

Thanks enjoy your life



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 01:08 PM
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a reply to: BigBrotherDarkness

Thanks without your permission I will do just that, you and my step daughter have a lot in common apparently, you both think the world revolves around your darkness, fortunately, I am guided by a higher power with the light of a 1000 candles and angels to show the way!



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 01:21 PM
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a reply to: searcherfortruth

Moth to flame or lighting the last one? No matter never mind never mind? No matter



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 01:33 PM
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a reply to: searcherfortruth



Good one!!!

I almost said the same thing as You did there, but I DID have control over that one!!!



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 01:40 PM
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a reply to: BigBrotherDarkness

So it is your desire to insert yourself like a moth to the flame? Okay, consider it extinguished in a mass at my feet. You are trying to get the last word, too, I suppose, hmmmmmmm? Not a chance.



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 01:42 PM
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a reply to: SyxPak

With the exception of the Uncontrollable FIRE breathing laughter apparently!



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 02:22 PM
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a reply to: searcherfortruth

LMFAO!!! Yah. In that You are once again correct. You know that laughing was about Your reply there, right? LOL! I couldn't resist using that image for it! Was NOT in control of that...



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 05:25 PM
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a reply to: SyxPak

Oh I got it!



posted on Nov, 29 2016 @ 06:35 PM
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Hello SFT. Those are some very difficult conditions you are dealing with.
Since you posted that here, it is assumed that you are open for discussion.
The contention is that all concepts of control: are illusion. Simply the ego running roughshod, and winning.

If so: please name one single thing, which you think you have control over.



posted on Nov, 30 2016 @ 12:39 AM
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a reply to: Nothin

I have control over my own control.



posted on Nov, 30 2016 @ 10:27 AM
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a reply to: searcherfortruth

Searched for yourself and what exactly did you find? A mirror of others to be fiction?

Congratulations on all your digging.



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