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I've lost my daughter.

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posted on Dec, 9 2016 @ 12:44 PM
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a reply to: bally001
Bally,
I'm sure the Holidays don't make any of this any easier. Still sending you positive thoughts and prayers!




posted on Dec, 13 2016 @ 06:26 AM
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a reply to: bally001

Just checking on you friend and hoping you are finding strength.

We are still here hoping for a good outcome.



posted on Dec, 13 2016 @ 07:28 AM
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a reply to: bally001

Hopefully the tides are changing in your favor?



posted on Dec, 13 2016 @ 01:26 PM
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a reply to: Martin75

I'm changing my attitude and adjusting to not only make it easier for the family but for both my daughter and me. Holidays will be different but I've been looking at it like another one has left home but perhaps at a time where in my thoughts she is perhaps a little too young and mixing her social life with those who who may provide more excitement over the holidays.

I guess the balance is staying sane for the rest of the family.

My regards,

bally



posted on Dec, 13 2016 @ 01:35 PM
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a reply to: TNMockingbird

I guess the shock is nearly over although at times I let my guard down and something un-towards happens. For example my youngest son, 14, had his birthday not so long ago and asked for money instead of presents to top up his pocket money for chores. He wished to buy a new X box. Family, including his older brothers and sisters living elsewhere sent cards with cash to help him. Poor young fella kept his savings in a drawer under clothes. Other morning he was angry. Money was gone.

I have found my wallet empty at times myself and kick myself.

These little things serve as a reminder when the young lady is in the house (welcomed) and disappears again.

We have to be a little more careful with our possessions now.

bally



posted on Dec, 13 2016 @ 01:47 PM
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a reply to: MiddleInitial

Yeah, cheers MI.

As I replied to MARTIN75, and I appreciate the concern, I am just adapting and getting away from the guilty feeling as a parent who may have failed my daughter.

I find this attitude change has taken much of the sad or angry feelings away. We can't keep chasing her. This is reflected in her relaxing a bit towards us.

When she turns up at home, although there is a quite time between us all, the conversation strikes up for a little and is constructive and not destructive. As I said in a previous post we have to be careful with our possessions but this is a small price to pay I think in the long term.

We're always there for her but the only rules I think I need to stick to is no abuse or threats directed to her mother as her kind mum is the person I will be spending the rest of my life with and she doesn't deserve that treatment. I don't want her mother feeling guilty and being sad.

regards to you and yours,

bally



posted on Dec, 13 2016 @ 07:36 PM
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a reply to: bally001

Darn it, I should have done the obvious thing and caught myself up via reading the most recent stuff in the thread.

Some days, you can call me Captain Oblivious.

I'm glad there's been a little lift for you. Sounds like your attitude is in the right place, and I can't say as much as I'd do anything different if I had to.

I had hard teenage years (socially and emotionally), and they were hard on my family, too. It took me lots of time and reflection to come to terms, appreciate the situation for what it was, and start walking straight. What I'm saying is that I have lots of confidence that things could totally turn up for you.

Cheers during the holidays!



posted on Dec, 17 2016 @ 11:02 PM
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bally, I know how hard it is for you to find a balance and to be strong for the family. You sound like a wonderful Father and Husband. Reassure your dear wife that she is not to blame in any way and neither are you or the rest of the family. I'd like to see you and your wife focus on each other and the other children for Christmas and try to have a decent Holiday. Your daughter knows you are there for her. You have done all you can.




posted on Dec, 25 2016 @ 05:30 AM
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a reply to: bally001

Hope you had a good one today mate and that the news is better with your daughter . Cheers mate .


Crabbing in 5 days .



posted on Dec, 26 2016 @ 11:13 AM
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a reply to: bally001
I hope that Christmas went well for you and your family. I also hope that 2017 brings wonderful progress!!!



posted on Dec, 27 2016 @ 05:01 AM
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a reply to: MiddleInitial

Cheers MI. On occasions I'm biting my bottom lip. Keeping the peace for the family but also discovering an inner peace and accepting that this may be par for the course.

My regards for xmas and New Year for you and yours.

I appreciate your kind words,

bally



posted on Dec, 27 2016 @ 05:05 AM
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a reply to: Night Star

I read your little post script at the bottom of your kind words. Taking it to heart and those words give me strength. So far its as smooth as I can make it.

There is a change and I think it's from within.

Appreciate your concern.

All the best wishes to you for 2017.

bally



posted on Dec, 27 2016 @ 05:10 AM
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a reply to: Martin75

Well, Christmas day went better than I thought. The young one came home and was embraced by all. Great to see her smiling again. No harsh words.

She is away again tonight. I think of her but then have to not think of her....Does that make sense?

Focusing on the future. All's well.

Thanks for your kind support. I wish only good things for you over this holiday time and into 2017. Stay safe.

bally



posted on Dec, 27 2016 @ 05:18 AM
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a reply to: hutch622

It was a good day thank you mate. I was a good boy I think. Not too much to drink, did a bit of cooking and enjoyed the 'presents' time.

No oysters this year, miss the 'Coffin Bay' shells. Used to have them shipped up to Darwin, where, I caught me own crabs and Barra. Now on the eastern seaboard its the old supermarket seafood.

Waiting to have the boat repaired and will drop a few pots and do a bit of trolling off the 'Solitary Islands'. Will let you know the result.

Jealous of you going crabbing. Next time I'm down south I'll look you up.

Enjoy your holiday period. I reckon you got all you need. You're a good bloke. (I miss pronto).

bally



posted on Dec, 27 2016 @ 09:47 PM
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a reply to: bally001

Glad to hear that Christmas went so well bally! I hope the new year brings the family peace and joy.







posted on Dec, 27 2016 @ 11:10 PM
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a reply to: bally001

That's a horrific thing to have happen. But you can't give up. ...and even if she hates you for the rest of her life, she'll be alive to do so.

Not quite the same thing, but there are parallels...

My best friend in elementary school was regularly beaten by his father, to the point of bruising, but never where anyone could see it, and he, and his sisters, were great at hiding it. One day, like many kids do every single day, we were messin' about, and he collided with me, and he winced away from me and the other friends with us...

The rest of us knew instantly what had happened--we just somehow knew. He begged us not to tell anyone, he was crying for us not to. To this day, it's one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. We told the school nurse, and the principal what we thought was going on.

To this day, and it's been almost 40 years, he hasn't spoken one word to me that didn't contain four letters and end in "you".

But he's alive to hate me. Not much solice to be taken from that I suppose, but she'd be alive to hate you.



posted on Dec, 27 2016 @ 11:12 PM
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a reply to: bally001

This is what I get for not reading the entire thread...

Really glad to see things might be looking up, at least a little.



posted on Dec, 28 2016 @ 05:15 AM
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a reply to: Night Star

Great pic Night Star. Was looking at the stars tonight from my back verandah. Things went a little awry today.

Looking forward to a level playing field one day. While I'm still adjusting I tend to feel the drugs have got my young lady. The venom in her words today directed to even her grand parents was sad. I can also see the physical changes over this week.

She is far too young to start looking wasted.

Yeah, xmas was good but a change again, backwards, these last few days.

regards for your support.

bally



posted on Dec, 28 2016 @ 05:42 AM
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a reply to: seagull

It's okay gullman. Just another roller coaster ride. Appreciate your input. I'm active in protecting my daughter but have to weigh up the result if I go all out and disregard the other children and my wife.

None of my children are spoiled kids and I'm not caving into her needs so she can do what she wants' She knows what she is doing is wrong but now the lady can't help herself and her reaction to this is taking her frustrations out on everyone else.

I have questions to answer particularly from her siblings now who, while the older ones are mature, do not understand the effects of substances. I cop a bit of "Yeah, but dad!" after trying to explain this, But perhaps this is a great learning for them. They are all good children, with jobs, with no problems at school or work. My daughter is the exception. I am learning too through this.

I accept the consequences of if, it, goes too far. The situation has gone beyond our influence. Somewhere, out there, there is another person pulling the strings. Sure, if I find this person, I would do what any dad would do to protect their young ladies. But getting the right person is a battle. I've met lots of losers in this effort.

For example, one young man I fronted was okay, really, straight but my emotions got the better of me and I said, in a pissed off tone, "Go near my daughter and I'll rip yer face off, stuff it up yer ar@s and you'll be looking at yer intestines stupid". Here, I am wrong. Wrong guy, poor timing but I let those emotions get away with me over this issue I've posted here. Sorry but I gotta get it right. So I'll wait, but if I do find the >stupid a hole> who put my young girl in this position I can't say what I would do but it wouldn't be nice.

Think I've said enough Jonathon. Just upset mate.

Thanks for your concern,

bally



posted on Dec, 28 2016 @ 06:03 AM
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a reply to: bally001
I'm not sure why but today when I was reading through the thread and looking at your avatar this song came to mind...



I continue to hope and pray that your daughter decides to fight for her life. It might not be easy but life is so worth fighting for!!!! Thank you for the updates and I hope you will break through to her soon. The fact that she still comes home is a good sign that she has given up completely!




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