When a friend rips your heart out...

I am a 53 year old woman - I've raised a child of my own, helped raise other people's children - I've studied psychology enough to know that 95 percent of the way people behave has everything to do with themselves and nothing 'personally' to do with anyone else...

...so, shouldn't I be too 'grown-up' by now to be in such pain over something like this?

I'll spare the details - essentially, I just had a very, very, dear friend 'dump' me...we had been closer than sisters -
- she was someone with whom I had shared my heart and whose heart I truly believed I'd had a place in.

It's funny how you can sort of see something coming, and still end up being blind-sided by it -

- I mean, it's just that, having been sort of aware how it was 'trending', I would have thought I was 'braced' for the impact...
...but, man oh man, this hurts so bad!...

...like, it feels as if the tears are never going to stop, kind of 'bad'..

I'm old enough to be someone's grandmother (glad I'm not, but still) - surely I should be 'grown out of' being so vulnerable to such emotional pain?


Anyway, really sorry to 'air my sorrows out' here -

- it's just....the only person I 'had' to talk to about things like 'the state of my heart', is the one who ripped it out...

Golly moses, I really should be too old for this crap..

a reply to: lostgirl

I know sadness sets in with a broken heart, I don't think age matters because we all have feeling from the day we are born until the last day of our life.

I am sad for you but sometimes sad things like this happen for a unknown reason. Something better will be out there when you lease expect it.

Feel better.

I am sorry for your pain, people never cease to amaze me with there self centered ways. Another life lesson learned I guess, I also hopped at this age I wouldn't be blindsided again.
You sound like a good person, keep doing the next right thing. Not for them, but for yourself.

I understand. I had a friend I thought I would grow old with, had known her for 15 years.... and we had a falling out, and I cried and cried. It's been 6 years since, and when I think of her, I still cry. I cry for wishing things were how they were when we got along and agreed.

It sucks when you lose your diary.

It's okay. A lot of us understand.


-Alee

a reply to: lostgirl

I think you'll be better without her.

a reply to: lostgirl

I am sorry for your loss. I know what it feels like to lose a long-term friend and it is a loss, so mourning is natural. After much reflection, I now know why we became friends and also why we parted ways after 16 years.

It seems like a loss because you're still clinging to the idea of who you thought they were, what they've done is show you who they really are...it's actually a gain that will make your life better, not worse.

a reply to: lostgirl



Sorry for the hurt and pain you are going through at present ... things happen

for a reason, and you may just have out grown each other without realising it?


In life as one door closes invariably another door opens?

There will come a time in the future when you will look back and things will be

clearer.


Make this a wake up call .... take a different direction and do things outside

of your normal comfort zone, meet new people and challenge yourself to be

daring!!!


*Best of luck* and best not to dwell to much in the past you have an exciting

future ahead grab it with both hands *Life is what you make it*

a reply to: lostgirl

Why do you think you're dumped though? Did something specific happen? Otherwise life can be very fickle. Time limited. Circumstances and situations change. Is it possible the person is just going through something?

a reply to: kosmicjack

That is a great outlook, you never know, this person might be going through a hard time but still wants to be with lostgirl.

I know in my life I have hurt others because I was in a bad place in the head. If the love and friendship is there it will return.

a reply to: kosmicjack

No, it isn't that she's "going through something"...

...It's more complicated than this will sound -

- but basically she has decided that my friendship is no longer of use to her, because she has met a group of friends nearby (we don't live in the same state) who provide all the friendship she needs..

And it's not as if I begrudge her that - I'm glad she has friends where she is and have told her so...

...I just honestly never thought it would end up meaning that she couldn't be friends with me as well.

Anyway, thank you for replying -

- and thank you to everyone else who replied also!

I really appreciate all the kind words and well-wishes...it truly helps knowing people care!

There is no such thing as being too old to feel sad and betrayed. I'm sorry to hear about this situation, sincerely.
Thing is, you can study all you want, try to predict people's behavior, observe the same patterns occur again and again, but in the end you'll end up surprised anyway. People are crazy!

I think you'll be better without her.

Also, this ↑.

Be well, friend.