I'm sorry you're feeling so bad.
Honestly, grief is a powerful thing. It's been known to make people physically ill, even. My mother nearly triggered a heart problem after her father
passed purely due to grief, for instance. And she's tough as nails. It can be very daunting. Don't feel compromised by it, it's natural as Night Star
said. It's built into us, even our bodies (there's a definite physical component of profound grief.)
I agree with all the previous advice, and in somewhat the same vein of crossword puzzles, I would also add, as weird as it may sound: the most time
consuming, grindy, repetitive video game you can find. Nothing too hard, but something that you can eventually forget about and just go through the
motions, iteratively. A JRPG or one of those match 3 games (bejeweled, Puzzle Quest, etc.) but something with a sense of progression.
Something that doesn't distract or numb, but at least gives you somewhere for all that energy to go, and something rewarding that makes you feel
you've accomplished something.
It could also be exercise, building something, a project like a model kit, one of those huge 1,000 piece puzzles, etc. Whatever it is, at the end of
it, whether it be hitting a new weight goal, having a completed model or puzzles, max leveling a character in a game, painting your house, etc. I find
enough time has passed that I feel better finally, and I've accomplished something born of my grief.
Or as another poster said, doing things for others, taking solace in knowing that in your own grief - if able - you've helped them. That does wonders
too. Though, for me at least, the truth is it just takes time and I have to fill that time with something.
I hope you feel better.
edit on 11/4/2016 by AceWombat04 because: (no reason given)