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I just find life can get so depressing at times.....
page: 1share:
I just find that life can get so depressing. Like one minute everything is going well; the next all hell can break loose. Like for me things have
stabilized I guess you could say but I'm sorta left in a bad spot. I'm struggling financially, i'm now over 40, and really not much in life makes
much sense anymore. Like I keep telling myself "don't worry things will get better" but not a whole lot seems to change, regardless of how hard I
try.
I'm working on some new projects to try and fix my financial issues but any gains seem like such a long ways off. Plus I haven't seen any progress. So it's just very frustrating. Like I still try looking at the bright side but it doesn't help. Like I'll say to myself "you got it good compared to a lot of people". Which is true to a large degree. But still, i'm not those people. I'm me. So I really am hoping for some positive changes which so far I haven't seen happening.
Like how do you even stay positive when not much is working out or going right for you in life? Like I literally have nothing to get up for in the morning. I do anyway I just work on my projects in the hopes that one day they'll start to materialize into something and into some income. But still, it's a struggle to even work on them. I just wish life wasn't difficult. I don't know why it has to be so hard. Like when is it gonna get better? And then what if it doesn't? That's why I sometimes just think I'd be better of living out in the woods or something. Cuz there's nothing for me here it often seems.
Like isn't there some way to snap out of feeling depressed? And stay out. I've tried things like affirmations and stuff like that but they don't seem to do very much and or they don't seem to materialize into anything real.
Any advice would be appreciated. thanks.
I'm working on some new projects to try and fix my financial issues but any gains seem like such a long ways off. Plus I haven't seen any progress. So it's just very frustrating. Like I still try looking at the bright side but it doesn't help. Like I'll say to myself "you got it good compared to a lot of people". Which is true to a large degree. But still, i'm not those people. I'm me. So I really am hoping for some positive changes which so far I haven't seen happening.
Like how do you even stay positive when not much is working out or going right for you in life? Like I literally have nothing to get up for in the morning. I do anyway I just work on my projects in the hopes that one day they'll start to materialize into something and into some income. But still, it's a struggle to even work on them. I just wish life wasn't difficult. I don't know why it has to be so hard. Like when is it gonna get better? And then what if it doesn't? That's why I sometimes just think I'd be better of living out in the woods or something. Cuz there's nothing for me here it often seems.
Like isn't there some way to snap out of feeling depressed? And stay out. I've tried things like affirmations and stuff like that but they don't seem to do very much and or they don't seem to materialize into anything real.
Any advice would be appreciated. thanks.
First post ever after many years of lurking to say stick in there mate be well enjoy the experience there is many who feel the same dont take it all
so seriously
you will get through this ,and if you need to chat to another human outside of forums just send me a pm and we can compare crappy past few months and
whatnot,just keep on keeping on and try to focus on the smallest of good things and work from there i had a problem w debt at least in my case funded
by drunken/depressed shopping so i know how that can be just dont act rashly on the sad thoughts and u will persevere
If you are just 40 and in good health. you have a great amount of positive in your life; you just don't see it.
Everyone goes through sad periods in their life, you are not alone.
Truthfully, when you feel things are not going your way positively for a long period of time in my opinion you have two options:
1. see a therapist who will give you pills and talk forever. or
2. shake it up-go on a journey-there are lots of opportunities to tour the world through volunteerism or church related journeys.
Remember, life is a journey and everyone's journey is different.
There really are alot of different support groups you could join and volunteerism helps make friends.
Firstly, you gotta reach out and that is hard to do but just do it. Whether it is just getting away from that dreadful computer
and join some meet-ups groups or church or volunteerism-get up and get out.
Being in nature itself is also a big stress reliever. Get a dog and love that dog and visit parks-dog parks make a great way to meet others. There are a zillion parks-visit them all-appreciate your ability to take in all that grandeur-you might take up some new hobbies-what are your interests?
I think you have dwelled too long on all that negativity trying to get finances in order and left out- the joy of life. It's there-you just get out there and find it.
It's not easy-just take baby steps-but if you think you need more help-there's no shame-talk to a therapist-I think they really do wanna help.
Best wishes on your journey-once you take that first step the rest will come easier. I do care.
Everyone goes through sad periods in their life, you are not alone.
Truthfully, when you feel things are not going your way positively for a long period of time in my opinion you have two options:
1. see a therapist who will give you pills and talk forever. or
2. shake it up-go on a journey-there are lots of opportunities to tour the world through volunteerism or church related journeys.
Remember, life is a journey and everyone's journey is different.
There really are alot of different support groups you could join and volunteerism helps make friends.
Firstly, you gotta reach out and that is hard to do but just do it. Whether it is just getting away from that dreadful computer
and join some meet-ups groups or church or volunteerism-get up and get out.
Being in nature itself is also a big stress reliever. Get a dog and love that dog and visit parks-dog parks make a great way to meet others. There are a zillion parks-visit them all-appreciate your ability to take in all that grandeur-you might take up some new hobbies-what are your interests?
I think you have dwelled too long on all that negativity trying to get finances in order and left out- the joy of life. It's there-you just get out there and find it.
It's not easy-just take baby steps-but if you think you need more help-there's no shame-talk to a therapist-I think they really do wanna help.
Best wishes on your journey-once you take that first step the rest will come easier. I do care.
edit on 22-10-2016 by Justso because: (no
reason given)
edit on 22-10-2016 by Justso because: (no reason given)
edit on 22-10-2016 by Justso because: (no reason
given)
a reply to: bigpatato
Hey dude, I share your story honestly... I'm working on my own stuff for over a year now, failed in a few businesses, haven't made a dime in 2016 and it's really hard, but i'm still hoping and working towards it even though the road is sometimes extremely difficult.
Many entrepreneurs are failing at the beginning, until they learn how to make things right. Just keep learning from your mistakes, know that money is the result of success and giving value to others. Work on the mental side of it, it's even more important than what you are doing.
If like me you had jobs you hated and nobody around you to taught you about money and business, then just accept it's a curvy road and you have to recreate yourself anew and everything you once thought in order to make it.
I recommend listening to Harv, feel free to pm me we can try to help one another on this journey if possible.
Hey dude, I share your story honestly... I'm working on my own stuff for over a year now, failed in a few businesses, haven't made a dime in 2016 and it's really hard, but i'm still hoping and working towards it even though the road is sometimes extremely difficult.
Many entrepreneurs are failing at the beginning, until they learn how to make things right. Just keep learning from your mistakes, know that money is the result of success and giving value to others. Work on the mental side of it, it's even more important than what you are doing.
If like me you had jobs you hated and nobody around you to taught you about money and business, then just accept it's a curvy road and you have to recreate yourself anew and everything you once thought in order to make it.
I recommend listening to Harv, feel free to pm me we can try to help one another on this journey if possible.
Are you able to get some paid work? You could still pursue your projects in your off work hours and this would almost certainly bring about some
improvement in your finances, plus it would give you a sense of purpose and some thing to get up for.
edit on 22-10-2016 by
CulturalResilience because: (no reason given)
Become a warrior, in the don Juan Matus tradition. You'll look at the world in a different light.
A warrior's personality, his spirit, is marked by consistency, detachment, objectivity, sobriety, and above all, total dedication.
The warrior lives by a discipline the average man can't even conceive, much less practice.
Warriors relax, abandon themselves, fear nothing. Only then will the powers that guide us open the road and aid us. Only then.
A warrior's personality, his spirit, is marked by consistency, detachment, objectivity, sobriety, and above all, total dedication.
The warrior lives by a discipline the average man can't even conceive, much less practice.
Warriors relax, abandon themselves, fear nothing. Only then will the powers that guide us open the road and aid us. Only then.
Excellent advice, I would only add lift heavy weights often and eat healthily.
originally posted by: ColeYounger
Become a warrior, in the don Juan Matus tradition. You'll look at the world in a different light.
A warrior's personality, his spirit, is marked by consistency, detachment, objectivity, sobriety, and above all, total dedication.
The warrior lives by a discipline the average man can't even conceive, much less practice.
Warriors relax, abandon themselves, fear nothing. Only then will the powers that guide us open the road and aid us. Only then. [
edit on 22-10-2016 by CulturalResilience because: (no reason given)edit on 22-10-2016 by CulturalResilience because: (no reason given)
a reply to: bigpatato
I've been there, friend. Unfortunately, there is no way to just "snap out of it".
It's bad enough that we live in a depressing world, but some of us are unfortunate enough to also have a family history of major depressive disorders, which means the cycle will most likely continue for as long as you continue to pass on your genes.
The "there are people far worse off than myself" argument is a weak one and doesn't help me either.
I've been there, friend. Unfortunately, there is no way to just "snap out of it".
It's bad enough that we live in a depressing world, but some of us are unfortunate enough to also have a family history of major depressive disorders, which means the cycle will most likely continue for as long as you continue to pass on your genes.
The "there are people far worse off than myself" argument is a weak one and doesn't help me either.
originally posted by: Dark Ghost
a reply to: bigpatato
I've been there, friend. Unfortunately, there is no way to just "snap out of it".
It's bad enough that we live in a depressing world, but some of us are unfortunate enough to also have a family history of major depressive disorders, which means the cycle will most likely continue for as long as you continue to pass on your genes.
The "there are people far worse off than myself" argument is a weak one and doesn't help me either.
There's no reason to compare with others, each soul is going through its own struggles and yes, even rich problems are rich problems and it's ok, it's all relative.
Just be careful to identify yourself with family history cause you'll just end up giving yourself a good excuse to just stay where you are thinking it's something bigger than yourself. Truth is, even genes needs a certain environment in order to get 'activated'. If you are in an environment that might activate those genes, then just change the environment and you'll feel better.
It's all about choices in life, especially when it comes to our own mental state.
originally posted by: Shuye
There's no reason to compare with others, each soul is going through its own struggles and yes, even rich problems are rich problems and it's ok, it's all relative.
I agree. Everything is relative to the individual having the experience.
Just be careful to identify yourself with family history cause you'll just end up giving yourself a good excuse to just stay where you are thinking it's something bigger than yourself. Truth is, even genes needs a certain environment in order to get 'activated'. If you are in an environment that might activate those genes, then just change the environment and you'll feel better.
I see what you are saying and agree to a certain extent.
It's all about choices in life, especially when it comes to our own mental state.
This is the part I do not necessarily agree with. It kind of insinuates that depressed people are depressed because they want to be depressed.
a reply to: Dark Ghost
That's what depressed people don't like to hear.
Obviously no one wants to be depressed, people are depressed because of all sorts of reason... The main reason I see is they focus on not being depressed instead of on being happy. Depressed people hope the depression will go away, instead of trying to draw things into their life which makes them feel good. Depressed people believe their depression is strong and caused by something bigger than them, so they refuse to try and take action cause what's the point, right?
That's why i'm saying it's a choice, taking responsibility is a big step towards liberation.
That's what depressed people don't like to hear.
Obviously no one wants to be depressed, people are depressed because of all sorts of reason... The main reason I see is they focus on not being depressed instead of on being happy. Depressed people hope the depression will go away, instead of trying to draw things into their life which makes them feel good. Depressed people believe their depression is strong and caused by something bigger than them, so they refuse to try and take action cause what's the point, right?
That's why i'm saying it's a choice, taking responsibility is a big step towards liberation.
originally posted by: Shuye
That's why i'm saying it's a choice, taking responsibility is a big step towards liberation.
Why exactly should depressed people take responsibility for feeling depressed?
Is the world generally full of love, happiness, fairness, justice and peace?
a reply to: Wardy22227
This is very good advice. A pet is beautiful - they are loving and always there for you. The exercise fresh air and sunshine will also help drive the blues away.
to bigpatato,
Hang in there, when you say "living out in the woods" why not visit the woods more regularly. But it's also important that you maintain human contact - we are after all social animals.
Being in nature itself is also a big stress reliever. Get a dog and love that dog and visit parks-dog parks
This is very good advice. A pet is beautiful - they are loving and always there for you. The exercise fresh air and sunshine will also help drive the blues away.
to bigpatato,
Hang in there, when you say "living out in the woods" why not visit the woods more regularly. But it's also important that you maintain human contact - we are after all social animals.
a reply to: Shuye
I think what SHuye is saying is that the more you focus on the depression the more dark you will feel; instead try to do fun thinks at first. I remember reading that it takes about 2 months to retrain the brain out of old habits.
"Neuroplasticity: can you rewire your brain?'
www.activememory.com...
For Brain Health, You Need Physical AND Mental Exercise
youtu.be...
I think what SHuye is saying is that the more you focus on the depression the more dark you will feel; instead try to do fun thinks at first. I remember reading that it takes about 2 months to retrain the brain out of old habits.
"Neuroplasticity: can you rewire your brain?'
www.activememory.com...
For Brain Health, You Need Physical AND Mental Exercise
youtu.be...
Exercise. Proven very effective dealing with being down. Don't need to spend money either. Set goals, log progress. I look forward to going on my 4.5
mi runs a few days a week, pushups, sit-ups. Start out with small goals. Build on it. The days you feel really down FORCE yourself to do it. Your body
and mind will start changing. Main thing is to find workouts you enjoy. If you don't like running go shoot some hoops...anything really. I would try
to stay away from the doctor if you can. All they do is load people up with pills but some people really do need it. Most however do not. Being down
sometimes is part of being alive.
a reply to: bigpatato
Oh, I feel lots of sympathy! I am trying to make a huge career change, and I am nearing fifty! I'm going back to school, in a country where that is not commonly done after the age of 25, and it's all in french.
I am going through days I have hope, to days I want to dig a hole in the ground and hide in it.
I feel like I have jumped into something way over my head and am going run straight into some painful walls soon.
The only thing that keeps me going until the next day is thinking about other big challenges I have faced in the past, how hard they were, and how elated I felt when I finally achieved success!
One of the things I have learned about myself is- when in the first stage of really hard, brain frying, scary effort,
it is important not to look too far ahead.
Our class is being asked to make huge drawn out plans for the future and all, and I am refusing to do that as of yet, because I know that if I do, I will quit. I have a vague idea of where I am going, but I really need to focus all of my energy on each immediate step right now.
It's like climbing a mountain- avoid staring up at the top and contemplating how long and difficult the road will be to get there- just keep moving, look at each step before you take it, and live each step fully. Soon you'll be at the top!
For me anyway, if I am busy sending my mind away into the future, I am putting less energy into the moment, and my actions become less efficient. I end up running, but not getting anywhere.
You'll have to see what works for you... just threw my own methods in to consider.
I hope all the best for you and pray it gets better soon!!!
Oh, I feel lots of sympathy! I am trying to make a huge career change, and I am nearing fifty! I'm going back to school, in a country where that is not commonly done after the age of 25, and it's all in french.
I am going through days I have hope, to days I want to dig a hole in the ground and hide in it.
I feel like I have jumped into something way over my head and am going run straight into some painful walls soon.
The only thing that keeps me going until the next day is thinking about other big challenges I have faced in the past, how hard they were, and how elated I felt when I finally achieved success!
One of the things I have learned about myself is- when in the first stage of really hard, brain frying, scary effort,
it is important not to look too far ahead.
Our class is being asked to make huge drawn out plans for the future and all, and I am refusing to do that as of yet, because I know that if I do, I will quit. I have a vague idea of where I am going, but I really need to focus all of my energy on each immediate step right now.
It's like climbing a mountain- avoid staring up at the top and contemplating how long and difficult the road will be to get there- just keep moving, look at each step before you take it, and live each step fully. Soon you'll be at the top!
For me anyway, if I am busy sending my mind away into the future, I am putting less energy into the moment, and my actions become less efficient. I end up running, but not getting anywhere.
You'll have to see what works for you... just threw my own methods in to consider.
I hope all the best for you and pray it gets better soon!!!
a reply to: bigpatato
The best advice I ever received regarding depression was from an elderly neighbor of mine - she was always happy and active. I ask her one day what her secret was to remaining so a positive about life, even though she had experienced many challenges. It was the following 3 things:
1. Get Up.
2. Get Dressed.
3. Get Out.
Another words, get out of your bed, your chair, your sofa. Get yourself showered, groomed, looking sharp (what ever that means to you) and get out of your HOUSE. Get interested in others.
You never know who you can meet or what you can learn and how it can change your life. Give it a shot!
Bests.
Missie
The best advice I ever received regarding depression was from an elderly neighbor of mine - she was always happy and active. I ask her one day what her secret was to remaining so a positive about life, even though she had experienced many challenges. It was the following 3 things:
1. Get Up.
2. Get Dressed.
3. Get Out.
Another words, get out of your bed, your chair, your sofa. Get yourself showered, groomed, looking sharp (what ever that means to you) and get out of your HOUSE. Get interested in others.
You never know who you can meet or what you can learn and how it can change your life. Give it a shot!
Bests.
Missie
a reply to: bigpatato
If you do have a history of depression/mental illness I'd honestly advice small steps towards comfort and happiness.
I've been there, I guess I still am. Their is no quick fix and how long to combat it can depend on just how bad things are. As others have said excersize is great and so is company (a pet). Hobbies, volunteering and social interaction all help too though again I'd honestly say take your time, swinging yourself into things can make another episode much worse.
I don't know what else to say, I'm here if you ever want to PM me. I sincerely hope things look up for you soon.
If you do have a history of depression/mental illness I'd honestly advice small steps towards comfort and happiness.
I've been there, I guess I still am. Their is no quick fix and how long to combat it can depend on just how bad things are. As others have said excersize is great and so is company (a pet). Hobbies, volunteering and social interaction all help too though again I'd honestly say take your time, swinging yourself into things can make another episode much worse.
I don't know what else to say, I'm here if you ever want to PM me. I sincerely hope things look up for you soon.
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