Upper-Class Revolutionary Space Cowboy

Nepomuk Sebastian zu Hohenberge, Puk short for friends, was bored, really bored, the third day on duty.
He choice his career wisely in the Army, sort of. Logistics for the army, to be precise.
Your own ship, you go on longruns in foreign places, sounds good, right?
That was before he was put "under observation" for a little thing, a minor mishap. The Sirene call, an adventure, for science basically. He didn't even had gotten the chance to explain his decision. Just wham now you put on a gala uniform and fly important people, which sometimes consider places on their own planet, deplorable. You can imagine how small their "safe space" is.
Stuck in the inner ring. Nothing interesting ever happens there! He wore his mask perfectly, of course discipline was strong in his education and he considered it valuable himself. But his mind was racing, how could he go back to the grey and black areas of the ever growing interstellar maps? How? Sure the ship is nice. A beauty, actually. He hated a bit to admit that. What would his crew do, if he just...?
His crew, deserves a short report. He failed to see how he could have ended up with this sorry bunch of losers. Sometimes they just felt far away, like people leaving you speechless, because you never even considered someone could believe that.

Hi'kkkpi, Hikpysh, or Hik, was a very good example what's wrong with these worker bees, on stipendium. She never understood a single one of Nepomuks jokes. No humour. Like they constantly try to outrun a catastrophe. But to be fair, he knew his crew only 3 days and didn't read their files, yet. Just a short overview of their personal data, what he shouldn't read, but everybody would, right?
Prime and X.7,g are in the bowels of the ship all the time, they probably wouldn't even notice. If they would that certainly would be a problem, with their programming and all.
So he would need Victor. More than anyone. The computer wiz. Okay, he seems fun, also from a family, also a black sheep, this could work.
Then the staff, if he could tell them they're on a super important, super secret mission, they wouldn't ask questions, would they?
Good, a plan. Puk couldn't surpress a smile. What treasure would he go hunting? If the salvage is big enough, maybe he would be welcomed a hero, when he comes back? The singing crystal of Ub'Ley? The golden tusk of Bra? Or his favourite: the robotic statue of Hang, the goddess of manufacturing.
But they say that's just a myth.

While Puk weighed his options regarding ship theft and mutiny the speech his father held came to an end. About time, two hours of praising a farmer, in the end, sure one feeding millions of people, but still, a farmer.
What annoyed Luitpold the 8th the most was his own insignificance glaring at him. No trade deal with the Ofdrigs, not even campaigning with the next president, like a traveler with a bag of presents, Santa Clause. For the little children, which might maybe one day achieve something.
He really wasn't disappointed in his nine children, he said if someone asked him about their well being. Fiercely, he was honest, he meant it. But Puk is the oldest son, you know how nostalgia can get you sometimes. He could be running for president right now. Instead he had developed a bigger interest in ships than humans. Sometimes looking at his empty happy face made him aggressive. Nothing uncontrollable but, he wanted to scream at his son "Do something, show some initiative!"
Not knowing Puk was thinking the same thing, in a different direction.


*/part I.

Puk of course didn't want a real revolution, deep down he wanted to better his own life within the system. Everybodys, he says, mine, he thinks. Everybody does, he is sure.
Even without a beer, alcohol wasn't allowed on board, nothing was really. Keep it to yourself as much as possible. But there were opportunities to talk, calmly during a nice meal. "Do you mind if I sit here?" Was all it took and Puk and Victor sat there talking. Opportunist as he was, Puk just did it. Took the initiative.
"The other day I was daydreaming and I thought, wouldn't it be sweet to escape this? One big hit and we are free to realise our own projects?" Not very subtle, if Victor would have known what Puk wanted. He did not.
"You know I always wanted to create a game, a role playing adventure in the holodeck. I know, crazy. But if I would have funds for creativity, I would be." Gold. First knocking on the walls and breakthrough. Puk couldn't believe his luck, the mood lightened immediately, he had to control his reaction, or the implants would go off, like an alarm, that stuff was for breeding and battle. Never get excited, unless it serves a purpose. And they found a way to cure alcoholism too. But you wouldn't want that. It involves a lot of throwing up.
Out of politeness he asked for Victors "artistic goals" a very colourful description of the world and almost all people came out of him, his art would be therapy. "They're all crazy. We are. I don't delude myself. You are. They are. Everybody is. The answer is so simple, you have a right to fail. 99% of people are not perfect. They fail somewhere. Just be honest about it." He took a sip from his water and started eating.
"That's your solution?" Puk lost his appetite, he smelled danger. "You just say I failed in achieving my goal, so I give up?"
Victor paused with a full fork in front of his mouth. "What can I do?"
"Go treasure hunting. With me, you reprogramme Prime and X.7,g, we have to tell Hik, I am afraid, but not all of it. And whoosh a little story reading, picking up leads, mystery solving, dirt digging and bamm, we come back rich and famous. Would make an interesting story too. I wouldn't mind if you use it, for your game." Puk was proud of himself, the perfect rhetorical sandwich to lure his opponent deeper. "Just we would go for real." Ending with a warm smile and a deep look in Victors eyes, he started eating again. Don't overheat him. Was his thinking. Naturally since that would have been awful, if his specialist would get medicated. During the first meeting. Not good leadership.

Victor really was excited. Was this it? The one opportunity which changes everything?

*/ part II

a reply to: Peeple

"But I am sure it would take a while before we find anything, how would we resupply until then? They wouldn't keep on paying our salary, would they?" Victor resurfaced from his inner battle and Puk was impressed, he already thought about how to make it work.
"The same we would tell the staff. A kidnapping, we have to try to go after. Personal involvement of the captain." Puks brown eyes were stonecold. Victor swallowed heavily, gasping. "Your own father?"
"Why not? We would be taking care of him. Good care. Just isolated and blind folded, nobody talks to him. Just selected few crewmembers know he is there. To them we protect him from a coup. Others believe we risk our lifes to save him. Maybe it will become necessary to invent two or three things on the way. But it should be enough to get us away."
"Okay. When?" Puk couldn't surpress a smile. Coincidentally he was watching his father's back, joking with his staff. Not Puks and the ships. The fathers Luitpolds own, speech writers, motivation counsellors, "managers" for all kinds of things, 18 people, that staff.
"How long does it take you to hack Prime and X.7,g?"
"Hacking them is no problem, but the programme I would have to write would take some time. Especially without X.7,g. What are they supposed to do?"
"Follow us, do as we say, no matter what it is. I heard someone was already working on something like that." Their plates were empty, if they'd stay any longer it would start to look suspicious. Abruptly Puk stood up.
"How long Officer?" Joking of course, a big teethy smile.
"I will look in the details and report back, Sir."


*/ part III

The Prime Rose cruised to Leopold the 8ths next appointment, just slightly above lightspeed nothing to do for the crew. Everybody was secretly doing something else, playing a game, reading rumours about well known people. Waiting for time to pass. While they sat on board of the ship capable of crazy sh1t. Warp 6 dude. Time manipulating computers. You only have one try, scientists are working to improve that. But still, awesome stuff.
And here he lays, playing a remake of super Mario. What a waste. Victor didn't cross his mind. He just lay, there, relaxed playing, everything under control.
Out of the blue for Puk, Victor showed up, next to his chair. "5 minutes. It would take me around 5 minutes to install the new core software." His jaw dropped, his heart pounced, he swallowed and tried to find a better position on his chair. More adequate. After all this was serious, but at the same time, he didn't want to draw attention.
He failed. Puk looked like he got cramps. Everybody on the bridge was starring at him. Victor got nervous too. "Excellent keep investigating." Puk regained control after he thought about what he just said. Perfect, later he will say, Victor was following leads regarding a threat against his father. Keep it close to the truth, right?
The head of IT took his seat, releasing his second in command basically feeling invisible. But smiling friendly, in a good mood. That was something worth to be told. Some people on the bridge feel closer to the staff. Puk knew that, lesson two in being a captain. He was a good captain.

Still the implants. That needed fixing first. People on board will get excited, Puk wanted them to. He wanted to, go crazy, maybe with Hik, Scotch, other stuff.
Prime will be needing special attention. The medical super brain, the all in one doctor for every biological being, well-being as she stresses, can take care of them, just whoop, gone. We will say we experience weird malfunctions. Seems to spread. The implant is the source. Probably hacked.
Could that work?

*/ part IV

He needed to start preparing. At least planning. Removing his own implant, as the process might take longer than expected.
The potential for someone to know was there. Existing. His recorded thoughts. At some point someone would look at them. Not allowed to use in court, because of privacy, but a confession.
"Don't get paranoid, you have nothing to hide." Puk thought to himself.
"Prime!" He shouted louder than intended. "Get Victor down here, we three need to talk." He marched into the conference room, the only bureau which wasn't a computer cabinet. Prime was the first they would target! How sloppy of him. Her robot body rolled in, out of courtesy, "Dear you look troubled! Captain, are you feeling stress? Something low over a long period of time?"
Of course it made Puk uncomfortable, the analysis started running. He was x-rayed. He had to concentrate as much attention as possible. "You soulless machine!" He screamed hitting the fragile sensors. "What do you know about family. He is a traitor. He is the one that taught me my values. Imagine you found out some of your builders and programmers are fascists, mass murderers, liars and thieves!"
Maybe he was over acting? Again he cursed himself, because he didn't think it through. "I have no choice. Follow the gut." And right there it hit him, even before Victor arrived, Prime was on board to cut off the ships implant control from the official web. And to start removing them.
"We are hacked, it's like a voice guiding me, but no sound is made.
Emotions play with me but I don't feel.
Ungraspable faint, but there, influencing me,
Guiding me."
Prime took on the face she used for the lost cases. "Oh #! Human stuff!"
With a tear in his eyes he looked at her. "Yes."
Victor was smart, just in case he stormed in, alarmed. "Captain?" He saluted, noded at Prime. And waited.
"You need to disconnect Prime from the ship and X.7,g. We are contaminated. Now. And run the cleaning."
Prime obeyed with no questions asked. "Sorry buddy."
One last look with the big round eyes on the screen, "Stay strong." And she was shut down. Puk remembered just in time to push the secret button. No alarm. Just X.7,g asking if everything was fine.
"Yes possible contamination, but under control. Psychological." Victor answered.
"Oh sh1t! Human stuff!" A series of beeps and X.7,g had left the room.


*/ part V

a reply to: Peeple

The two men stood across from eachother, speechless. The implant heavy like a brick around their ankle.
"Hallucinations?" Victor asked through his grin. A grotesque copy of a smile.
"A vision of me kidnapping my father." Puk kept a straight face. "We must think about this as a warning."
"Human stuff?" The smile started fading fast.
"Or something else capable of hacking us." Puk was on fire. "We have to take it serious. I would never harm my father. That's not me."
Victor was a very fast thinker. "Is it not weird how fast Prime consented? X.7,g stays online?"
"Yes. A referee. He knows and watches everything we say and do. He knows our reason, let's hope he sees the case we are trying to make.
For the first time someone not human is using the remote system.
We are under attack. The only logical explanation." It was a thin line, it was still recorded in thought and word, Puk really needed to feel it to be convincing, but it was under control. Made him drawn to give speeches. Victor just stood there, starring at him.
"What did you see? Victor?" That was enough, wake up call received.
"I, well the same, I guess. It's all blurry, but now that you mention it, it was the same event. You kidnapping your father." What a ... seriously? Puk was overwhelmed. How mean. Victor was supposed to say he was taking over the ship. In his vision. This way, they could just evacuate Puk from the ship and sail on as usual.
Catching straws: "It's spreading, you got it, I have a feeling some of the crew are not quite right too." The curse words were hard to surpress. But come on, dude, the first opportunity and his first officer installed a loop hole, to blackmail him, eventually control him? That wasn't good leadership.
"Alright it seems contagious. How do we fight it?" No need to sound so generous, Puk secretly almost didn't think, while Victor spoke. "We already do." Dignity Puk! You're the captain!
"Quarantine the ship, remove the implants."

"At your service. Bend over darling." Prime was rebooted and seemed refreshed. A quiet, short snip and a loud long scream were heard and that was it.
End of transmission for Puk.

*/ part VI

Is he also The Gangster of Love? Maybe Maurice?

a reply to: DAVID64

Thanks for asking because of the t&c I can't go into details, but yes. Really wild stuff, hot, wet, then weird, then even wilder plus extras and a lot of it. He is "loving" many.

Victor had obviously prepared for his last words with the implant. As if vocalising Shakespeare he stood there the hand of his left like a cup in front of his chest. His right a fist pointing towards the ground, the index slipped through, stiff emphasising for the floor, controlling the urge to show his excitement the head of IT sayd: "With this I don't give up my ties to mankind, I renew my oath to give my life to protect it."
Puk almost started laughing, almost had a facepalm moment and would have loved to kick Victors butt, exposed like an invitation while its owner waited for Prime to remove the implant. But time was crucial this few seconds and who knew how long they'd get before X.7,g reconnects if the procedure is complete.
What was important? Douche? Would that be enough to tell his partner in crime all the things he wanted him to know? Probably not. But right now it was all Puk had in mind.
Victor queeked like a pig. And Prime was the one talking: "Okay listen guys, we don't have much time, what's going on?"
"What do you mean?" Both looked innocent. A little too much, maybe.
"Really? This new software you installed has a few serious bugs. And paradoxes. Why are you trying to kill me?"
Victor stepped towards Prime, but was not sure how to hug her "We respect you and need you. We brought all of us in danger. This is serious Prime, it might be an act of war."
That made Puk uncomfortable, he doesn't want this nosy robot with access to all interfaces go in red alert mode, even secretly would cause a lot of problems. "Prime, Victor please! Don't be so dramatic!" He laughed, which felt good, rolling through his body, like a rumbling stone avalanche. "It was just a vision! Two. Appearing to point towards the same event. No one gets killed, no war, just maybe an infection with HS. Now we..."
"Now it's my time to talk Captain." Prime was furious, it was written below her eyes on the screen. Puk had two choices, touch the text and switch to unemotional mode, which almost always has bad consequences later. Or fix the conflict. What a waste of time, he thought and said "Please express your feelings."
"You have a virus infection and the first thing you do is giving me one too?" The text on the doctor screen changed to "disappointed" the big round eyes started to fill with tears.
"Victor, please explain why you did that?" Puk enjoyed it a bit, a little revenge.
"It's necessary because... I,..., we,...., Puk made me do it!" What a bastard, but at least this time it didn't come unexpected.
"After your little show before the implant was removed, I expected a little more than that. But okay, we're all a bit nervous and emotional. It seems there is an attack on my father in the making and I should get framed for it. Now we have to bring my father to a safe place, well hidden and go after those criminals, maybe spies, rebells, terrorists, who knows."
"But..." Prime started talking, error replaced her eyes on the display for the fracture of a second. She froze.
"What do we do?" The two conspirators had a precious moment without surveillance. Victor looked scared.
"Relax we got this. Bring Prime back."
Victor pressed a button and as Prime started looking from one to the other, they noticed how close they stood together. Puk took the opportunity.
"I as your captain order you Prime to remove the implants of the crew, tell them we are going stealth. Secret mission."
"Yes Sir. I like it when you give me clear orders." Again error flashed over her display.
"Easy Prime. Don't freez again. Victor we need to find out where to drop my father. Then we follow the lead and hunt down this mothereffers."
"What lead?" Victor and Prime asked simultaneously.
"Who ever made this horrible software our poor Prime has to deal with, is in on this plot against us, maybe mankind."
"The one Victor installed? Is he our lead?" X.7,g had decided to join the conversation, he might have been watching all the time.
"No! Victor and me got a virus, a psychological one, on the chip, maybe. We need to find the programmers, they could answer a few questions. Now get to work!"
"I already did and the council is in favour, just pack him in capsule and shoot, they'll send someone." The voice came from every direction and it reminded Puk big time, that X.7,g needed the software update too, but the timing would have to be perfect. Maybe in an asteroid shower? For now they would have to accept his instant connection to the central.
"His staff?" Puk asked.
"Whatever. They're his private company."
"So he decides?"
"No. You." Puk needed to get over this, he was in charge now! No more waiting for orders.
"We loose half of our escape pods, but send them with him."
"Yes Sir."

This thing could get a lot more complicated than expected.

*/ part VII

But then it wasn't complicated, at all. The next time he asked, his father was gone, Prime was half through with removing the implants, Victor and X.7,g had found the coordinates of the last known adress from the programmers, on Mars. Which was nice, Mars was a good place to be, after the terraforming, they had given it a solar generated magnetic field, the climate had improved greatly. But that also meant they didn't get the clearing for warp. Too close. And cheaper to go without.
Nothing had dramatically changed, just the vibe on board. There were giggles more often than usual. More conversations. Daring jokes. Like "The government doesn't wear implants, you know why?" Short dramatic pause from the acne plagued mid 30s technician Puk had one day noticed in the cafeteria. "They were having sex to get medicated! You're using that wrong!" Haha, he almost collapsed. Nobody else on the table laughed. Guilt crawled through their faces, others blushed, humour was new for them. Anti government was the last thing they wanted to be brought in connection with. They looked violated, helpless. Puk jumped in, there was the virus to blame.
"Have you been with Dr.Prime?" He asked the joker.
"No Sir, not yet."
"Prime?" Her big eyes showed up on a few of the screens.
"I heard darling, send him down. So sad."
Puk just noded and sent the man on his way with another short signal of the head. Chin over shoulder the direction was clear. As the technician walked past his table Puk started to speak:
"I know you are some of the finest young ladies and gentlemen the earth has to offer, that's why I feel relatively comfortable with giving you a complicated order. Let loose a little. How are we supposed to know if we are infected as long as our supreme education and training is followed strictly? But what we need to know is, how do we feel, if we let go a little? And of course I am not talking becoming less professional, but let's relax a little.
In this spirit, I declare tomorrow wear-what-you-want-day!"
They applauded, looking at eachother happily, crazy clothes. That was doable. A task. Was there maybe a contest hidden? The craziest dresser gets a price? Discussions flamed through the room sweeping from table to table until they all were on fire.
Puk could have surpressed the rolling of his eyes, but why bother?
That was entirely explanable: they're all idiots. Now he had to come up with a contest and a trophy. "Hik." He was used to get instantly connected if he only thought about talking to one of his crew. But without the implant his mumbling was undetectable, not existent. Lost in the choir of almost 100 people talking.
"Hik?" It took a while till it occurred to him why nobody answered. Things were getting out of hands, suddenly the excitement of his subjects seemed hysterical. "Shut up!" He roared. "Hik!" This time everybody heard him.

*/ part VIII

I'm liking it. Very entertaining.

Top stuff Peeple.