a reply to: Freija
I think you're giving parents far too much credit or blame. They only contribute so much and when society and culture changes so rapidly and so
radically, whose fault is that?
Of course it´s mainly the parents fault. We as adults make up the greatest part of society and culture, the kids to a smaller degree, too. I don´t
"blame" anyone alone on it. Of course they make up their own mind and will not always share the same views as their parents and that´s good. But we
as parents have to give them a perspective on life.
At best, different perspectives.
Let me tell you a story about a boy who had no father because he bailed, mother did not care and if there was something to eat it was processed food.
This happened years ago. When he got together with my wife´s sister and we invited them over to a dinner, he said he never ate so good in his life.
That it was actually the first time someone cooked for him. With cooking he ment cooking, not tossing something into the microwave or mixing together
water and powder.
He was 24 years old and because of the sugary stuff and bad mouth hygenie, had his 3rd teeth already. He never learned how to greet (he just looks
away when he gives you the hand) and can´t get anything done to the end, because no one teached it to him. They were almost always alone and guess
what, the TV parented them.
I could go on with some more cases I personally know. Believe me, it IS mainly the parents fault.
Sounds like some machismo crap which is fine and noble but we've obviously had some very different experiences.
I myself was always pushed as a child, I was schooled 5 1/2 years old because my parents wanted it that way. Guess who was the weakest in class?
Regardless what I acomplished, it was never enough! I was called names by my father I would not dare to write here. I was beaten up for no reason and
my little sister was a professional, in construing a situation where I would get a beat up, just for her laughs. You know what he used to say?
"A punch on the back of the head, gives you a greater horizont" (translated).
So, if you have read my posts before and are still with me now...
I ask you again, if you see my reasons for being the way I am as "machismo" as you paint me.
Are you still thinking I blame the parents to much?
Where does it come from...
...that I care so much what others think about me?
...that I can´t look away when others are in the same situation?
Although I know the reasons since some years, it´s very hard to change yourself. This is my point, I hope I wrote it in an understandable way.
edit on 4-9-2016 by verschickter because: (no reason given)