a reply to: IceHappy
Sorry for being long winded, my story is to give others a sense of hope.....
Writing emails allows one to use what was written to be used as bullet points thus like an outline going back and attempting to write better. I spent
much time at this editing! When we got texting less time was available to adjust ones words... So the question to the phone conversation - I had to
walk and clear my mind. Thus far we were getting to know each other very well! Main rule for the both of us was honesty! So after the walk I
decided that I had to allow her to have a conversation as really that was the next level as it were! What did I have to loose???? My wonderful new
pen pal that is what! What was there to gain.... A DATE - Oh yes of course that is what this exercise was about!
After two weeks of talking we made a date 2 weeks from then, in Cornwall, in a cottage.... What little I saved in the last three years was not
important, then I saw the prices as its the most busiest time of the year. The expense was almost two months rent.... It does not matter! I am not
materialistic as money is a tool to live and enjoy life! Nothing was available, I became panic! Dr. X sent me 3 suggestions all were hmmm more.....
I swallow hard and made a suggestion of the second one, a wise choice in hindsight!
She asked for my bank details which I ignored. Three days later I received a cheque for the amount. We had a conversation over that one.... It was
pointed out that I could not afford it.... there goes my pride.... Long thought of the late 60's and early 70's how much I wanted womens lib to work
out and desired a strong but educated lady and of course what would I do in reverse.... after calling myself a few names I deposited the cheque. Our
first date was a 3 day weekend! Only, a week before, I received a call from this professional lady that she did not really want to wait that long!
She have between the drive (now known to be 230 miles as the web site was not correct in distance) round trip she had 18 hours.
To say that they were the best 18 hours of my life would be failing this last year as everyday we are better! We agreed to no hmmm physical
relationship outside of my giving her a rub. I said I would be happy to sleep in the front room. After a 2 hour rub she was not having that.... So
I suggested we just sleep together, after all what did I know about pleasing a lady which of course was a scary idea.... that did not last long....
I failed as many males would with fail marriage and lack of intimacy of 10 years and not having much core strength! That was okay.... She left after
18 hours whilst I was concerned about her drive back. We spoke on the phone as she had hands free in her car!
The 3 day weekend was beyond words thanks to the medic who prescribed the Male Vitamin that made the disabilities not effect the moment.
My lovely Lady is a who's who and very secure. Every time my male pride comes into what is being spent, I asked myself what did I do for my Ex? Why
am I judging me.... She reminded me of my written words, "Money is only a tool for buying what is needed along with pleasures of life!" Last
Christmas she had a family trip half way around the world! At this point she had made me an associate member of her hmmm not cheap gym. My old
Ranger attitude resurfaced in the swimming pool..... I used to think Aqua aerobics was for wimps 28 years ago.... boy did I find out that was a
stupid attitude from Sept to Dec. I worked very hard and found myself a new stronger body, still broken, still chronic pain only now its been 6
months without pain pills. I was asked in the steam room why I was NOT flying out to be with her... My answer was two fold. Man pride and
economics.... 3 days later I found a ticket on my plate.... it was purchased several weeks before my sad answer....
This is now almost a year since our first voice conversation! I am now her driver as she has an important job with many phone calls and much work.
In time she has the confidence in my driving that allows her to do work in the passengers seat on her notebook, this gives us more of "our time". My
ex never like my driving and was very vocal about it once moved to this island! The funny thing is with what she has she has economically, she had
more reason to have a long term writing relationship, whilst I had to have confidence in the person I wanted to be with. I am so very, very lucky as
she is intelligent, beautiful and very physically fit! She is also 5 years my junior!
Here is the funny part. She never notice those test results that I took trying to attract her attention! The reason she saw me was not because the
website link us due to compatibility as they had my profiling wrong, but, because each time I look at her profile that action put me on top of "People
who view her profile" LOL....
I am not saying on line dating is for everyone. I needed a Lady who I could talk to and share ideas etc.... Someone who was real not like my ex who
had no care of the world situation etc who considered me a conspiracy nut.... My new Lady is of higher consciousness and she understands the world as
many of my fellow brothers and sisters here in ATS....
For Her and I - On Line Dating worked. We are one..... and no I do not live with her albeit this has been suggested by some of my village friends
and ex! Keeping my flat allows us a place where my Lady is NOT busy and allows us to be together by CHOICE, not living arrangements or a piece of
paper saying we are wedded.... Choice is what is important NOT to allow complacency to enter our lives. Mind you she is so bright I cannot imagine
either of us ever reaching those shores. My girls accept her as her boys accept me, what is scary both of her parents are alive and they both accept
Guess that makes me one hell of a lucky man.... hmmm no guessing I am very lucky and exceedingly happy!
I have not listed any sites here as I do not wish to break T&C.... as if I ever read those..... If anyone would like to know the website that we met
in as the sound of good tests for comparisons between perspective dates please PM me. I cannot guarantee success, just saying 4 sites, this was the
one that worked for me! They are all international!
My Lady and I agree that one must be cleared of the past and by chance she lost her husband in the same month I was issued my exit papers! We both
took the same time to clear ourselves from past relationships. One is never cleared as we are all a sum total of what life experiences we have
survived. From time to time she sees my damaged from a partner who had no consideration for me and says sorry.... My story? I say never mind, Love,
without my past I may have never met you.... I would not change one thing of my past as that could have endangered my chance of meeting you!
For those who are alone, for those who are sad.... please do not give up.... in a twinkle ones life can change.... you must be up for it.... most
important.... between relationships find out who YOU ARE so that you are prepared!
As someone who left the US as California did not like my era Veteran I came close the December before My Ladies wink to move home to California. I
never dated in the UK and would not even know how to go about it here.... In my village there are a lot of women like my Ex... I just needed someone
close to my mind set!