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I will never grow a thicker skin, so just stop telling me to.

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posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 04:38 AM
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a reply to: geezlouise

I like you as a member and have enjoyed the various thought-provoking contributions you have made to this website, but I cannot agree with your opening post. It overindulges in upholding the victim mentality and encourages the reader to utilise their emotional reasoning skills instead of tweaking their intellectual reasoning skills.

I can appreciate that you are a sensitive and empathetic individual. These qualities can be blessings but they can also be curses when left unchecked.

At the end of the day, I believe the individual has a responsibility to adapt to society, not that society has a responsibility to adapt to the individual. The former is the more logical and reasonable expectation, the latter is just plain unrealistic.




posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 05:03 AM
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You can't change other people, they are what they are and they do what they do.
The only thing you can change is yourself, including how something affects you or how you deal with it.
The world doesn't owe you certain behaviour that you expect. Because everyone is different.
That is part of growing up.

When people say 'grow a thicker skin', they don't mean take it all lying down. They mean learn how to deal with reality.

In my opinion people say that not to be nasty to you but the exact opposite. They have life experience and they are giving you good advice.

You of course can decide to suffer immensely and let others bring you down instead of working on yourself. But if you do, understand that in that case nothing will change.
They will still be nasty for the next 1000 years and you will still be suffering.

I had to learn the hard way, you can take the advice or not. That's adulthood for ya.



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 07:46 AM
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a reply to: Dark Ghost

Be honest. If everyone expected society to conform to them, we would have anarchy, not society because everyone has a different idea of what their ideal society would be and how it would bend over to meet their specific needs and requirements. This is sort of where we are trending with SJWs and we see the chaos they create when they try to enforce their ideologies on others who think differently.



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 07:52 AM
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a reply to: Hecate666


When people say 'grow a thicker skin', they don't mean take it all lying down. They mean learn how to deal with reality.

Sometimes

Sometimes it's a way to shut people up and get them to conform. Not all situations are equal

Ms. Louise has a lovely way of outfoxing her audience

This has become a kind of mantra lately - a part of our culture. Don't speak out, don't complain, don't be offended. Our OP is making this personal, but she makes a more important point I think and is addressing a trend. There's a national tendency by many lately to say: Stifle Yourself

Grow up - because real grownups don't complain?


The world doesn't owe you certain behaviour that you expect. Because everyone is different.


Do you see? How is this not exactly what the OP is saying?



edit on 6/29/2016 by Spiramirabilis because: (no reason given)



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 07:53 AM
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a reply to: ketsuko




This is sort of where we are trending with SJWs and we see the chaos they create when they try to enforce their ideologies on others who think differently.

Because the SJWs should conform to your way of thinking?



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 08:20 AM
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This is fine if there is real abuse.. the problem is these SJW types are quite clearly mentally deranged, they thrive on having a victim mentality and can't seem to even handle people disagreeing with them. If there's not a problem they'll make sure to invent one. It is unhealthy in the extreme the way these people nurture their weakness and their victim mentalities. They're not fit to handle the World.



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 08:23 AM
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a reply to: TheLaughingGod




This is fine if there is real abuse.. the problem is these SJW types are quite clearly mentally deranged, they thrive on having a victim mentality and can't seem to even handle people disagreeing with them. If there's not a problem they'll make sure to invent one. It is unhealthy in the extreme the way these people nurture their weakness and their victim mentalities. They're not fit to handle the World.


Is there anything in your post that would lead us to believe that you can handle views that are different from yours?

:-)



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 08:36 AM
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a reply to: redhorse

He is free to be an asshole.. it's not illegal to be an asshole. Do you want us to outlaw being an asshole?

Many leftists probably wouldn't have a problem with that, just more totalitarianism from the left. What a joke.



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 08:47 AM
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originally posted by: TheLaughingGod
a reply to: redhorse

He is free to be an asshole.. it's not illegal to be an asshole. Do you want us to outlaw being an asshole?

Many leftists probably wouldn't have a problem with that, just more totalitarianism from the left. What a joke.


I don't think that you could ever come to a conclusion if you couldn't jump so far.

Nobody said anything about making anything illegal. Where are you even getting that? Weird.

Just more hysterical hyberbole from someone invested in a certain world view.

(I'm not left either by the way.)



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 09:02 AM
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a reply to: redhorse

Otherwise what is your point? I'll answer your comment: yes, he is free to be an asshole. See, they way you say it it almost implies that he shouldn't be free to be an asshole.

Or am I to read your comment as: "So, unless I am paying you, you are free to be an asshole. Got it. Ok. Yes I agree, you are free to be an asshole."

Sounds somewhat contradictory when I put it that way. It would be a rather pointless comment. But in reality it's obviously some kind of critique isn't it?


a reply to: Spiramirabilis

I can barely handle them because they are so painfully stupid.. But here's the difference, I'm not advocating for the government to outlaw their point of view. I merely wish they die a painful death when Armageddon comes. Something to pay for all their crimes against humanity and nature, for their relentless shilling and service to their evil masters. Surely God will smite them for their evil ways?

And stop with the smilies.. you're not being friendly, you think it signals a detached and aloof disposition. Sitting on your high horse fake smiling. You're not the wise and calm old lady you portray yourself as, you're a shill and an evil witch defending the degeneracy of brainwashed mindless automatons.



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 09:22 AM
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a reply to: geezlouise

Wow, this post is chock full of people who have no idea what thick skin really means. Probably a clear indication of why American society is where it's at today. Punk kids get so worked up over "bein disrespected" that they go and shoot another kid. Lefties get so worked up over Tweets and Facebook posts and blogs they destroy a city block and beat up people who support a political candidate they don't like (T-R-U-M-P).



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 09:27 AM
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originally posted by: TheLaughingGod
a reply to: redhorse

Otherwise what is your point? I'll answer your comment: yes, he is free to be an asshole. See, they way you say it it almost implies that he shouldn't be free to be an asshole.

Or am I to read your comment as: "So, unless I am paying you, you are free to be an asshole. Got it. Ok. Yes I agree, you are free to be an asshole."

Sounds somewhat contradictory when I put it that way. It would be a rather pointless comment. But in reality it's obviously some kind of critique isn't it?



Ah... the "I don't really have a valid argument so I will make a semantic one" tactic. Legal sanctions on behavior would be wrong and prone to all sorts of nastiness. I had assumed (apparently incorrectly) that most people would be smart enough to recognize the social context. It hadn't even occurred to me that someone would be daft enough to think that I was making an "There Oughtta be A Law" statement.

So, "Free to be an asshole" was intended as without social constraints on behavior, not legal ones. I hope that cleared things up for you. Having (needlessly clarified) we both know, that you know perfectly well what I meant, but you are exaggerating for effect because you, and most of the others throwing a wall-eyed tantrum over this idea, just CAN'T STAND the thought of having to curb your bad behavior for any reason. It's like watching a bunch of little kids throw fits because people are suggesting that maybe, they might shouldn't, possibly, in some circumstances, throw fits and even *gasp* be considerate toward the feelings of other people. A bunch of entitled snots telling everyone else that they are entitled snots. It's just too rich.



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 09:53 AM
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a reply to: redhorse

Why would I need an argument when you haven't proposed anything.

If that wasn't critique then your comment was completely meaningless. It was supposed to be some sarcastic smart ass comment otherwise you could've just said you agree.

You know nothing of my behaviour outside of the internet, this accusation is nothing more than conjecture on your part. The argument goes; because we're tired of entitled brats wanting safe spaces, wanting to censor free speech, being triggered by clapping, being offended by nearly everything we are boorish thugs that can't handle people being annoyed when we constantly bully and insult people. Is that right? You know what that is called? A straw man argument. And an intellect that is wholly unwilling to actually confront the criticism that we bring. You know what that's called? Intellectual dishonesty and avoidance.



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 10:03 AM
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originally posted by: Joneselius
Being sensitive towards people requires the ability of empathetic self-analysis. This is something psychopaths don't possess. A lot of psychopaths have the qualities that companies need in higher positions of 'authority'. The cycle is never ending.

Being sensitive is, I think, one of the highest levels of conscious a human being can reach. Being sensitive means that you're sometimes going to be treated badly and you'll have to find a sensitive release for that. What I mean by this is the following:

A: an employee gets it in the neck by the boss and is penalized for a mistake. This employee then bottles up his rage and slowly but surely starts to release said rage against his 'lesser' workmates. This is not sensitive.

B: The employee who is scolded has a talk with the boss to iron out the reasons for the reprimand. He then informs the team under him what happened and asks them to empathize with his position. Once that's happened bridges can be built to prevent further occurrence.

Being sensitive is a HUGE leap in understanding. It's not something a lot of people understand yet. As attention spans grow shorter and the workweek is made unbearably long (with little familial contact) it may only get worse. After all sensitive people look out for one another.

Don't grow a thick skin. That's like asking someone to harden their hearts. It's the same thing, unforgivable.


You just reversed thick and thin skinned. Your character A has a thin skin because the scolding got to him and he seeks to take it out on others. That is weak.

It's difficult to tell whether your B was thick or thin skinned depending on whether they approached the situation with an objective eye or from subjective feelings, which can inform but should not govern.

Being overly sensitive can end up producing someone that's incredibly selfish. Your character B goes to make the case to their workmates after the fact. Do they only represent their side even if a valid point was made by the boss? If so, that is a problem with overly sensitive thin skinned people. They see themselves as the center of the universe and only their feelings matter. Yes their feelings matter and if the boss was wrong or overly harsh an attempt should be made to address that, but there is a creeping insidiousness if we want everyone to indulge their whims with no attempt at objective analysis.
edit on 29-6-2016 by WhateverYouSay because: (no reason given)



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 10:32 AM
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a reply to: geezlouise

Why do you care what a bunch of faceless nobodies on the Internet thinks about you or your opinions?

You're entitled to your opinion, they are as well. Often the two don't mix. Sometimes, someone is of a weaker nature and feels the need to disagree with a degree of vitriol, completely unwarranted.

But why should you care? I wouldn't let it get to you, there's people in this world who would pray to have only but name calling done to them rather than the horrible realities they endure daily.

Toughen up.



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 10:45 AM
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originally posted by: TheLaughingGod
a reply to: redhorse

Why would I need an argument when you haven't proposed anything.



Well if you are not presenting a counter point to what you assumed was my point (which I corrected you about), and if that isn't an argument than what exactly are you doing? You sure are spending a lot of time trying to discredit my not point with your not argument I guess. Weird.



originally posted by: TheLaughingGod
a reply to: redhorse
You know nothing of my behaviour outside of the internet, this accusation is nothing more than conjecture on your part.


Based upon your interaction here you are assumptive and clearly hypersensitive to any insinuation that perhaps you could be more considerate. I know quite a bit about you from this, and your other posts actually. You consider yourself an intellectual (of sorts). You have to be right. You are terrified of not being in control. You have low self esteem that you placate and hide by being an intellectual and emotional bully. Probably not physically violent though. I know you don't believe me, because it suits your view of yourself not to, but I'm usually right in my "reads".


originally posted by: TheLaughingGodThe argument goes; because we're tired of entitled brats wanting safe spaces, wanting to censor free speech, being triggered by clapping, being offended by nearly everything we are boorish thugs that can't handle people being annoyed when we constantly bully and insult people. Is that right?


No. That's not what I'm saying at all. Again assumptive, reactionary, hyperbolic and entirely incorrect. I don't like safe spaces either, and I never said anything about them. I am a proponent for free speech and I never said anything about censoring it. I think clapping at public events should be allowed and I never said anything about that either. I will say that being considerate of the emotional state of others is reasonable. That's my point. That's my argument. That's it. No clapping bans, no safe spaces, none of that silliness. Just a little empathy for others and some common decency.



originally posted by: [post=20921574]TheLaughingGod[/postYou know what that is called? A straw man argument. And an intellect that is wholly unwilling to actually confront the criticism that we bring. You know what that's called? Intellectual dishonesty and avoidance.


The fact that you jump from my rather complacent comments to some fantasy you have that I am involved in a leftish agenda where no one can clap and everyone gets a safe space is very telling about your psychology, and further, your own lack of intellectual honesty, and frankly intellectual avoidance. You are doing precisely what you are accusing me of.

I still see basically a pair of snotty kids who are hyper-protective of their snottyness. "I can say what I want cuz FREE SPEECH!" Well sure, the law protects you and it should. But I can still call you on being a crap-useless human being. I get free speech too. I'm not trying to curb yours, just tell you that you are behaving badly, in my opinion. I think maybe you are being more than a bit overly-sensitive here, maybe you need a thicker skin after all.
edit on 29-6-2016 by redhorse because: (no reason given)

edit on 29-6-2016 by redhorse because: (no reason given)



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 10:59 AM
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EDIT: Nevermind.
edit on 29-6-2016 by WeowWix because: (no reason given)



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 11:08 AM
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originally posted by: Metallicus
a reply to: geezlouise

Well, you can go through life a victim and get upset and weepy every time something doesn't you your way or you can 'grow a thicker skin'. Frankly, it is easier to toughen up and not let stuff get to you that doesn't matter.


Having deep emotion does not make you a victim, my wife is one of those who feels everything, it is the reason she is such a wonderful person. I would not change her in any way.



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 11:33 AM
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a reply to: redhorse

You had no point... just a smart ass comment that was completely meaningless. Again, if it wasn't critique why was it made at all? Because you agree with it? "OK, got it." As if that wasn't a sarcastic quip.

Your first paragraph makes no sense. It looks like it was written by a dog.

More conjecture on your part. I will say this though, anyone that is aware of what is going on on this planet that is not furious don't deserve to be called a human.

If you don't agree with such sentiments don't complain when we complain about them then.




but you are exaggerating for effect because you, and most of the others throwing a wall-eyed tantrum over this idea, just CAN'T STAND the thought of having to curb your bad behavior for any reason. It's like watching a bunch of little kids throw fits because people are suggesting that maybe, they might shouldn't, possibly, in some circumstances, throw fits and even *gasp* be considerate toward the feelings of other people. A bunch of entitled snots telling everyone else that they are entitled snots. It's just too rich.


The first sentence is completely made up.

The rest is apologising for SJW types.. because that's who we are complaining about. And they're not suggesting people be nice, if that was the case there would be no problem because that has been a part of polite society for a long time now. No, what they're fighting for is a whole nother range of issues. And you acting like we're mad about having to behave nice is disingenuous in the extreme.





No. That's not what I'm saying at all. Again assumptive, reactionary, hyperbolic and entirely incorrect. I don't like safe spaces either, and I never said anything about them. I am a proponent for free speech and I never said anything about censoring it. I think clapping at public events should be allowed and I never said anything about that either. I will say that being considerate of the emotional state of others is reasonable. That's my point. That's my argument. That's it. No clapping bans, no safe spaces, none of that silliness. Just a little empathy for others and some common decency.


Learn to read will you? If you can't understand what I'm writing there's no use in talking to you.

I didn't say these opinions were yours but apparently you're too thick to recognise the difference.

This is what I wrote:



The argument goes; because we're tired of entitled brats wanting safe spaces, wanting to censor free speech, being triggered by clapping, being offended by nearly everything we are boorish thugs that can't handle people being annoyed when we constantly bully and insult people. Is that right?


We had no problem with being nice being a societal expectation, this was already the case before these SJW started running amok.

What I said was correct. You accuse us of being boorish thugs because we're tired of entitled brats.



because you, and most of the others throwing a wall-eyed tantrum over this idea, just CAN'T STAND the thought of having to curb your bad behavior for any reason. It's like watching a bunch of little kids throw fits because people are suggesting that maybe, they might shouldn't, possibly, in some circumstances, throw fits and even *gasp* be considerate toward the feelings of other people. A bunch of entitled snots telling everyone else that they are entitled snots. It's just too rich.


The picture you're trying to paint is one where we're a bunch of boorish thugs that can't stand the thought of having to behave nicely. A more extreme mischaracterisation couldn't be made. We're tired of entitled brats and all those things I mentioned earlier, this is just a straw man argument of yours.



posted on Jun, 29 2016 @ 12:01 PM
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get off your phones, get off the internet, and talk face to face with each other.




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