Is it bad form to use personal details in posts?

Yesterday I started a thread, and I used a story from my private life to illustrate my position. I posted seven sentences in the entire thread about the personal story. The seven sentences had a total of 98 words. Somebody came into the thread and berated me for including too much personal information in the thread.

Let me put it in perspective. I posted 1,979 words in the thread in question. Ninety-eight words is a drop in the bucket compared to what I posted in total.

All of this has me wondering if there's an unwritten rule here about posting personal details in posts. I realize that most posters almost never do it. On the other hand, some posters practically use this forum as a personal diary.

I'm thick-skinned. I can handle criticism. I just want to know if I'm missing an unwritten rule.

What's your opinion on the matter?

a reply to: Profusion

Not unwritten. Good advice says don't vet personal details that might clue others into your whereabouts, description, name, address, phone number, whatever.

Its not like theres imminent danger, but you wouldn't normally go walking around in some parts of town either.

a reply to: Profusion

Be yourself and do 'you' within the T&C.

After that the haters can sod off.

a reply to: Profusion

Of all of the members here I wouldn't worry about one's opinion too much. I say that while offering mine.

I often post personal details in threads/posts. I am an open book, generally speaking. I am careful at times though as I have a daughter who reads the forum and if I am speaking on something specific to our relationship or something going on personally I try to be somewhat discreet.

If that personal information is helpful in clarifying your position or even the basis for the thread, then so be it. Who cares? It's your information if you choose to share it or not is your business, in my opinion.

We're all here to communicate and it isn't always going to be completely anonymous or random. We're real folks with real stories and real experiences and if we want to share than I think it's okay.

I don't think there's a general rule of thumb but I am aware of some members being very private and never revealing personal information and that's okay to for them.

My opinions, some, on the matter.

a reply to: Profusion

I didn't think so, unless you are stating your name and address. I think I once had a pic of a prescription I got removed, (there was a funny mistake in the instructions), because it still showed too much personal detail, though I had marked it up in paint a little first.

a reply to: Profusion

I don't care.

Simple as that.

Fearing what might happen if you pee someone off is just plain silly.

If in the unlikely event I get a visit from someone nasty, they will say hi to my version of home defense.

Here is phase 1.



and he is not one of these



P

Certainly not. But what's poor form is using your ex-wife's victimhood as a no-holds-barred excuse to tar & feather an entire gender for the actions of a minority of it. JMO.

a reply to: Profusion

I found the post. I didn't make a comment on the thread itself, but commented on the personal details just as I am here. I didn't feel it was a bad thing to include personal information in the way you felt would get your idea across.

a reply to: Profusion


It sounds odd that someone would literally berate you for posting personal details and I guess it's not really "bad form". But it's generally not the best idea. I would say that (in general) the more personal it is the more you have to think about whether or not it's worth the risk to your privacy (or possibly that of others).

Remember one thing about the internet. They say "the internet is forever". And while that isn't necessarily universally true, you have to assume that everything you put on the internet could remain for a very long time. And also that new technologies and methods of analyzing data will come about before said info goes away.

Anyway. It's happened to plenty of people who weren't expecting it. They revealed just a little too much info and it bit them. The kind of stuff you really want to watch is details that are very unique. For example, if you have a story about something that happened and it's the kind of thing that pretty much never happens to anyone, if someone who knows you (and also knows that story) sees it, they would know almost for sure it's either you or someone they know.

Anyway, being as vague as you can about personal stuff just gives you a little extra security in a world where you kind of need as much as you can get.

a reply to: Profusion

1. I fiercely disagree with your attacker.

2. I believe very strongly that personal details and anecdotes provide a wealth of benefit to the readers.

A) --it makes the points of the post more real
B) --it makes the understanding of the points easier and more personally applicable.

C) --it makes the practical application of the points more functional, useful, meaningful.
D) --it helps put the points in a context that better helps to judge the merit of the points and issues discussed.

3. Probably, the persons whining about such personal details are seriously RAD attachment disordered and feel insecure and nervous when confronted with candid, authentic, vulnerable personal details from another's lfie. They do not typically feel very comfortable being vulnerable at all. And when someone else is--they can feel a kind of vicarious insecurity, even threat--whether conscious or unconscious.

4. It is also likely that such persons do not have a clear foundational set of beliefs and constructions on reality that can well stand a thoughtful analysis and examination. Therefore, someone who is both openly, publicly, candidly vulnerable AND who comes across with some clear structural construction on reality that they have confidence in and find meaning in--that too can be threatening.

5. I say--CHEERS! CONGRATULATIONS! Please continue.

Walk softly and carry a big stick

a reply to: Profusion

There is the issue of security, safety, privacy etc.

With reasonable care . . . I think one can chart a practical course on those issues.

There is NO privacy or security in our era . . . the oligarchy has seen to that. ALL electronic communication circuits have been monitored for more than 45 years 24/7/365.

However, there is also no wisdom in allowing crazy net roaming jerks enough information to stalk you. All the more so if one says too many things against the Jihadi's.

And then, there's age . . . at my age . . . with my family dead and gone . . . no children or spouse . . . I don't care that much what others think about the priorities that I know to be true.

Most folks have read far far less than I have about a list of topics.
Most folks have lived far fewer decades than I have.

Most folks have loved far fewer people than I have.
Most folks have been loved BY far fewer people than I have.

Most folks have not experienced as many miracles as I have.
Most folks have not been as stripped to their bone marrow in as many long deep dark nights of the soul as I have.

Most folks have not traveled and lived abroad as much as I have.
Most folks have not experienced God demonstrably, overtly intervene in their lives as much as I have.

These are not things I can take any pride in whatsoever. I'm blessed to have loved as much as I have but even that was an answer to prayer and a gift of God, from God.

I share all that to emphasize that you, too, have your own unique life experiences. And you have a right to share them. They may be life giving to certain others. If folks want to throw rocks, let them go suck rocks and scroll on by.

If you are a fossilized old fart like I am--all the more reason to be brazenly bold about your personal experiences. If you are younger, I guess you have to judge what's worth sharing and what isn't worth the risk of others making connections you'd rather not be made.

Anyway--I only wish to cheer you on.

originally posted by: BO XIAN
a reply to: Profusion

There is the issue of security, safety, privacy etc.

With reasonable care . . . I think one can chart a practical course on those issues.

There is NO privacy or security in our era . . . the oligarchy has seen to that. ALL electronic communication circuits have been monitored for more than 45 years 24/7/365.

However, there is also no wisdom in allowing crazy net roaming jerks enough information to stalk you.

Yes. This. Exactly. I'm not worried about the government stalking me. I just accept it that if they want info on me, they can get it and there's nothing I can do to stop them. And I'm also reasonably certain that they have no interest in me anyway (unless they're just mindlessly tracking absolutely everyone who finds conspiracy theories interesting).

The people I worry about divulging too much info to are the random people on the internet. Many of whom may very well be crazy and petty enough to track someone down through any means at their disposal. It doesn't take a lot of personal info to find someone these days. A name and a general location is more than enough. Of course most people are smart enough not to give out a first and last name online (especially if they tend to get into heated political debates with people of questionable sanity).

Politics and religion are sensitive topics and some people online really are completely crazy and even violent.

a reply to: Profusion

As a rule online, it's probably best not to post anything that would help someone to identify or locate you. Lots of kooks out there. People do share a lot of personal anecdotes, though, and those shouldn't be a problem, within any guidelines for a site. Actual names, locations, place of business, that sort of thing; best to avoid.

a reply to: Profusion

I think that it is down to the individual to decide what they do and do not say about themselves.

A lot of people like to keep ATS seperate from real life as there are some pretty crazy ideas bouncing around that could make their life harder if an employer or familly member was aware of their tinfoil hat.

I don't really care, I am 39 and live in Swindon in the UK, My real name is Gregg.



Will I get in trouble for choosing to share this information freely and does anyone have the right to berate me for it?

originally posted by: pheonix358
a reply to: Profusion

Here is phase 1.

P

Phase 1 is stunningly beautiful! And while he may be no flower, I do wanna hug him!

Op, I think that posters who divulge at least a bit of their self- nothing identifying, but it helps the connection. I would much rather read something that humanizes, rather than sterilizes a poster and his/her words/narrative.

originally posted by: visitedbythem
Walk softly and carry a big stick

You reminded me of the old poster . . .

WALK STICKLY &
CARRY A BIG SOFT.

originally posted by: reldra
a reply to: Profusion

I found the post. I didn't make a comment on the thread itself, but commented on the personal details just as I am here. I didn't feel it was a bad thing to include personal information in the way you felt would get your idea across.

I consider that to be a personal favor. I feel like I owe you now. If I can do something to reciprocate your favor in the future, you can send me a private message anytime.

a reply to: Profusion

No, you haven't overlooked an unwritten rule.

There was an instance here a few years ago when this subject was broached within a thread about a similar topic, and degenerated into one poster putting up a pic of another posters house and yard that they found off Google maps. If someone here, or anywhere on the internet, wants to find your location......they will do so without the help of the words you use. The poster who put up the pic used means other than the words used here to find where the the other poster lived and posted it here without the other posters consent. THAT is against the rules. Not talking about your ex to make a point.

The moral of that story is......don't worry about what you say of a personal nature here. That doesn't matter much when you realize what some posters here are capable of doing in terms of finding you.

a reply to: Profusion

My opinion? Very bad idea. Best to leave personal names, addresses, personal emails, phones, locations etc...out of posts. Especially your full name and location.

Lots of thieves, creeps and stalkers about here. To generalize names and particular specifics and locations is safer for you and others.


***I did not mean specifically here at ATS. Inferring there are members who are thieves and creeps is unintentionally inaccurate and unfair. Sorry...just post carefully everywhere one visits online.

Thanks!