Always the drugs, huh..

a reply to: peppycat

Wow, you serious? Is this your expert point of view? I'm sure you have the education? I'm not gonna bait on your attempt

a reply to: bigfatfurrytexan

If a kid is fat it's probably because they move to little and eat to much?

Is it the kids fault?

a reply to: TNMockingbird

Yeah makes perfect sense.. Doesn't mean I agree tho

Perhaps it would be wise to close this post, its not going anywere good, and its sure not good for the OP

a reply to: tikbalang It's my personal opinion about someone only accepting negative attention...I've seen this in a loved one.
But do to the possible language difference you and I have, I guess there will be no insight from you as to why you prefer negative attention and do not explain things in depth.
As far as I know, you didn't know these people in your Original Post well enough to get involved in their issues and because of our language difference, I'm sure you won't explain how, where or why you got involved in their emotional issues...
Instead, I read cold unemotional responses in your posts on this thread.
I had asked you if the guy was your close friend and he never could speak up about his feelings to his mom... maybe his whole life, but you don't seem to want to go into any detail about this issue you got involved in concerning another families lifetime issues.

a reply to: tikbalang

Thats pathetic! You should have kicked her between the legs first, and then yell the blame onto her ! Amateurs always cutting corners...

a reply to: bigfatfurrytexan

I must agree with you, but as we are all bombarded with SO MUCH information these days, both good and bad, in the end it is up to the individual to believe what they WANT to believe and consequently do what they want to do. ie: drugs.

BUT, isn't it also up to the parent to GUIDE their children towards what we perceive to be certain truths in/of life? And therein lies the problem? A parent can only do so much, and in the end it's in the hands of their child to descern what's good or bad and hopefully choose what's "good" for them and in their own best interests? And whether or not what they choose is bad for them? I truly believe that some people are born, genetically predisposed to be self-destructive. I seriously believe that genetic predispositions influence more than we give them credit for. Until these possible consequences are understood, what can we do other than muddle along as best we humans can? And of course that's another can of worms we may or may not want to open.

PS. I've wondered lately if in a culture so mentally closed for 1400 years if that's not a big part of the violence stemming from such stringent religious indoctrination/beliefs in the ME that it has imprinted genetics and caused a predisposition towards violence. Especially with regards to inbreeding.

Am I missing something here? A little more context is needed. It's been a long day and maybe I'm overlooking something or maybe your just being a dick.

The story seems very odd indeed. We'll need to have a better understanding to truly understand.

originally posted by: tikbalang
a reply to: bigfatfurrytexan

If a kid is fat it's probably because they move to little and eat to much?

Is it the kids fault?

Even more, is it anyones business who is to blame?

Let me ask you this: had that elderly ladies sons been there, and decided to help you with all those loose teeth, whose fault would it be when you got fitted for dentures? Their fault for not allowing someone to make their elderly mother cry? Or yours for bullying an old woman?

a reply to: tikbalang

You dont have to lie. You should have shut up.

It all depends on whether she deserved that.. or needed to hear that.

I know a guy also took on a lot of stress due to disposition of his mom fell into particular drug. .. but nothing is clear cut and things happen for various reasons. Does anyone need to be blamed for anything? I don't know.

a reply to: nOraKat

Do you not think this guy had the choice of taking or NOT taking the drug he got into?

Seriously, I had the choice of taking the opiates I take now for my pain and I ACCEPT that as MY choice...as much as I MUST accept the choice my middle son had in taking the LEAGAL ones, prescribed by a licensed doctor that took his life. I would NEVER presume to deprive someone else of taking the exact same drugs in a RESPONSIBLE way. That, to me, would be tantamount to trying to get penicillin banned because a few people dying of an allergic reaction to it. Can you imagine where we would be without penicillin?? So, no one needs to feel the blame/guilt for another person doing what they knew better than doing in the first place. My son's brothers saw it coming even though i myself hid in my own denial and blindly chose not to see it, even though deep down I knew the phone call: " Mom, Michael's dead." , was coming...and it did.

And no, I'm hardly comparing penicillin to opiates since opiates are, or can be, an elective. It's simply a comparison for this thread.

originally posted by: tikbalang
a reply to: ware2010

Arrogance? Most of the problem in society is because the parents fail, but it's easier to blame something or someone else..

I think maybe you said the right thing the wrong way
Uncaring about a mother in turmoil and self loathing
Not a good fit

a reply to: tikbalang

You dont know the whole story, to just blanket blame her is the same as her blanket blaming drugs.

You shouldnt be bragging, its the sons fault for letting someone control his adult life, and using drugs as a coping tool... if thats even the case

a reply to: tikbalang

Wow, you are certainly one special person, aren't you?

a reply to: tikbalang

but it's easier to blame something or someone else..

Like parents?

a reply to: tikbalang

I'm saying look yourself in the mirror the problem might be the reflection not something else

So its the childs/mans problem abusing drugs and doing crimes and not something or someone else like the parent you had a go at.

a reply to: tikbalang

My dear we are born alone and die alone and past the age of 15 I believe the child is responsible for his own morality. The mother, society, or none else is to blame for the mechanisms we employ to emotionally masturbate our pain and boredom.

I come from an upper middle class family. I am of the generation when family reputation and shame were things that youth cared about, and when I got away from my family I smoked a lot of Marry Jane and popped Ecstasy pills.. for many reasons and none to do with the failures of my parents. There are no addicts or criminals in my family and I was not raised with bad examples. I am simply the reason why I CHOSE to partake in these activities in spite of my upbringing.

You are entitled to engage with the world the way you choose, but I think you should try a little tenderness in the face of another's pain.

a reply to: tikbalang

Who are you to judge her?? You've never made mistakes in life?? And the whole point of this was what?? It's not like she's gonna be raising any more children, so your point of this was creating misery for an old lady. Concern yourself with yourself, it's obvious you need some help. You seem very miserable. But how an that be seeing how your the only perfect person to ever exist??