posted on Jun, 18 2016 @ 09:06 PM
It seems that most here are talking about fathers who passed. And I'm sorry to hear of that. Peoples remembrances seem to be of good people too. I and
mine have not such "fathers".
I saw "For those without a father" and thought it might mean those of us who were abandoned by our fathers. Or, this too.
If it's OK for us to chime in too, I would like to do so. Me and my friend are bending our elbows for this actually, we don't have fathers, our
fathers left us.
And we came from "Typical Suburban Families". From people who wanted this and worked for this life. And then "dad" left.
And an intriguing thing, for someone else to research, my friend said that AFDC started in the 1950s or 60s because of so many men who
abandoned their "first families".
I try to read about history too and yeah, I believe it. You can see it. Everyone I know comes from divorced parents. Later on, we're younger, which is
another baffling aspect to it all because "the sexual (or cultural) "revolution" had already happened. So then you could choose to be Hugh Hefner or a
Biker or what not. But they chose the "traditional family life", and got the education and work for it.
And then they left.
The kids pay the price, believe it. People like us - we were left, we never heard from them again, they never paid child support, they never called,
not even on birth days or holidays, they never bothered with us at all.
They may have created new families that they liked better. They may have left them too.
Among me and my friends, the parental landscape is littered with drunks, junkies, jail birds, and various losers. Keep in mind: We all grew up in
"Middle Class" to "Upscale" suburban areas. NOT "skid row".
"Dad" often went to "skid row", my friend right here says: Yeah that asshole became a junkie. And a drunk. My "father" is a drunk.
And many of these deliberately turned themselves into dead beats too, so they wouldn't have to pay the child support. Which in most cases was
not even that much. Talk about a slap in the face.
Well and also that they didn't want anything to do with you at all.
We have no "Dad". We have no "Father". And it is clear that the man actively chose to ignore his children completely.
And these were NOT "bad boys". And THEY wanted the Family Life.
Until they didn't. And just left and left a mess in their wake.
I'm basically over this myself, somewhat over maybe, I'm approaching middle age. I do not trust men though. I would never trust a man completely. I'll
go out with them, live with them, I even married a couple of them. But the line was drawn at kids. I will not have kids.
Same for most friends. Male and female. We will not 'do this'. My friend right here drinking with me, she's a lot more volatile on this than I am. I
think she might strangle the guy. Hates his guts. Trusts no man. She's quite attractive too and gets male attention which translates to "they can't be
trusted" and "they're all pigs." I agree in some ways, enough of married men have hit on me too. It's quite disturbing.
And this, she wants me to put this, women too. She found "the whore" who "took her father away". Plenty of women just don't want to work and they'll
go after another woman's husband. Kids involved too. So she found this woman on FB, I said - let it go. This is going to help you, how?
You do want to rage at these people though. And I can see it too, from the timeframes, not sure how to say. Her father split at around the age of 35
and took up with a 17 year old single mother that he picked up in a dive bar. Not even old enough to drink. And she had kids too. Like the wife he had
My "father" and so many other "fathers", Suburban Biz Dads, followed the same path. Some just got remarried, created a new family and the F with you,
enough of others really hit the skids on booze and hard drugs.
We don't have "fathers" from being abandoned by them.
And most of us, it's not that we "hate men" - but we do not trust you at all. We'll mingle with you, be friends with you, date you, but we will not
marry you and we sure as # will never have kids with you. We will not go that far. We have opted out of "that lifestyle" completely. Men cannot
be trusted. And we saw what our moms went through as single moms with no child support, no help, and people wonder why we won't gamble on this?
Call us Feminazis all you want, another slap in the face when we're just trying to survive. Most of us from a young age.
My friend wants to say to her "father" that she hopes he burns in hell and or overdoses on something, she said she hopes he's in some # hole dying
with a needle hanging out of his arm, barfing his guts out and then collapsing. And "Maybe he'll hit his head on the toilet or something, do the world
a favor, good riddance."
This is "Fathers Day" for people like us.