I second this post:
originally posted by: DBCowboy
a reply to: rukia
Why do you want to die?
To hear that you've struggled with insecurities since you were a little girl hurts my heart.
I think instead of just treating symptoms, you've got to get to the root of this issue and find out what destroyed you when you were so young...
because I'm sure something has. Then practice radical acceptance about it, and get started in setting new standards for yourself.
Repetition is key in neurological re-conditioning... so maybe cut out photos of girls that are a healthy weight, write their weight down next to the
photo's with positive words like "healthy" and stuff, and look at them every day and aspire to be more like them everyday. Once you begin to look
like them and after three months or so of that, it'll start to feel like the norm.
I read in my text that after three months of repetition of something, it will begin to come more naturally to you.
You can literally change how you see things. Three months at a time. I've experienced it.
What you consider chubby/fat can begin to look skinny and healthy, literally. Just set a goal weight and maintain that weight for three months, and
etc. You can take baby steps. You can set a goal for maintaining a weight for four months just to be safe, and you'll begin to "see" differently,
When you have the urge to cut back... think of something ELSE you want to do, and reward yourself or punish yourself with other things that don't
involve food. Like, "if I eat this, then I can let myself do ____!" etc. It's about re-adjusting your focus, where you were focused on food, now
you are focused on something else. If you "mess up" then just let it go as a mistake and get back on track the next day.
I second group therapy as well, too. And a new therapist.
Hope you get better!
Btw, I have Type 1 diabetes... that means I'm on a life-long diet if I want to keep my limbs and live, until they find a cure!
It's an auto-immune disease that forces me to count carbs, and so now I keep track of all the food I eat, too. I've been surviving on carb counting
for three years now... I never once counted calories. I eat between 100-175 carbs a day. I never have soda, I cut out all sweet things like cakes
and cookies- I haven't had a bagel or a soft pretzel in three years! I drink water and coffee only, lol. I eat a #-ton of veggies, some fruit, high
fatty meats, and mostly whole wheat breads. I try to keep actual sugars under 20 grams per meal. I am now used to giving myself the serving size of
everything I make... So my diet is ultra strict. Maybe if you can't quit the dieting, you should just switch to a different but healthier diet. Just
something to consider.